Na Jaemin...

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Sorry, for selfish self of mine


Renjun glared up as he stabbed at his food, his chopsticks close to breaking the bottom of the container. It's not his fault he hated Na Jaemin, but he couldn't help his blood boiling every single time he saw him. Seething at the teeth, he rolled his eyes, sighing slightly as Jeno fed Jaemin some of his food.
Jaemin smiled sweetly, making Renjun want to throw up. "Thank you, Nono."
"Of course, Nana," Jeno grinned back, placing a peck on his cheek.
"'Nono', 'Nana', I think I'm gonna be sick," Renjun thought to himself. He huffed, slipping his phone out of his pocket with his earphones, plugging them in. If he didn't even try to drown him out he might actually commit murder. He put earphones in, blaring Day6's Congratulations through his ears. A suited song, he thought.

With that, he rested his head in his hands, staring up at the boy in front of him. Lee Jeno. Probably one of the prettiest people in the university, no, in the world, the galaxy. No other beauty could really compare. Everyone gushed about him from behind the scenes, Renjun just had the privilege of gushing about him while being around him. They had been friends for a while, and paired with Jeno's personality, Renjun couldn't help but fall for him. Now, five years after Donghyuck's relentless teasing, Renjun was sitting on a crush that had been crushed unmercilessly.

By Na fucking Jaemin.

Jaemin slid into the picture only a few years ago, maybe two, the second last year of high school. But it was enough time for Jeno to fall helplessly in love with him. And because Jeno had way more guts than Renjun could even try to gather up, Jeno took his chances and asked Jaemin out. Now Renjun was left third wheeling with a broken mess of heart, knowing that whatever compliments he could shower Jeno in would wash down the drain as if they were nothing.

Five minutes had passed, Renjun staring mindlessly at Jeno in all his glorious perfection as Jaemin soaked it all up and spat it out. As if Renjun had to grind his teeth anymore. He knew Jeno was happy, he just couldn't help feeling miserable. What the hell did Jaemin have that Renjun couldn't give him?

Donghyuck finally greeted them, sitting down beside Renjun and throwing his arm around his shoulder, giving him a peck on his cheek.
Renjun groaned, sending glares to the younger as he wiped his cheek. "What do you want?"
"Am I not allowed to kiss my homie?" Donghyuck shrugged with feigned innocence.
"No," Renjun snapped back with wide eyes, huffing before slumping in Donghyuck's arms.
Jeno chuckled, quirking an eyebrow and mumbling 'homie' under his breath. Jaemin laughed quietly himself as they both finally paid any attention to the other people at the table. Until either of them started paying attention to Renjun.

"Why are you laughing?" Renjun muttered irritably, sending daggers at both of them, but most definitely directed more to Jaemin. He couldn't help it. It was like hating Jaemin was built into his system. A bug that, no matter how many times he did try to fix them, just wouldn't go away. Not that his tries were really commendable in any way. It was more or less just Jeno nudging him, telling him to be at least a bit kinder to the brunette. That usually just resorted to a meek, unsavoury smile at him before going back to the roots of his disgust with Jaemin. 

Jaemin swallowed, smiling back at him, Renjun imagining the annoyance running through the young boy's head. Good, maybe he might get the gist. "We're not laughing at you, Renjunnie."
"Don't call me that, thanks," Renjun bit back, Donghyuck flicking his side at his tone again. Renjun could see Jeno sigh sadly in his chair, shoulders slumping slightly. Renjun bit his lip, sighing to himself. He had to at least put the act up for Jeno. "Sorry, Jaemin, I just don't really like being called that." "At least by you."
"Ah, I'm sorry, Renjun," Jaemin smiled sheepishly, "I won't do that again."
Renjun nodded, muttering "yeah, you better not" quietly to himself before taking a bite of his food. Donghyuck kicked him under the table.

Jeno huffed, linking his hands with Jaemin's, "Uh, I think we'll be off."
Renjun bit his lip, nodding reluctantly. It was his own damn fault anyway, he shouldn't be surprised. But honestly, how could he not even have a slight disliking towards the young boy. Though, it was probably ten times stronger than just a mere disliking. If murder wasn't illegal he reckoned that some time sooner or later, he'd rip Jaemin's heart out. Maybe by now he'd have done it.

Jaemin waved at both of them, standing up as Jeno picked up his half eaten muffin and coffee. "Bye Haechan," he grinned animatedly before glancing to Renjun, Jaemin's face dropping slightly as he casted his eyes downward, "Bye Renjun."

Renjun's eyes followed the two, harsh glares burning into the brown haired boy's back as they turned the corner.

Donghyuck huffed, flicking the side of Renjun's head, the older boy wincing harshly. "What the hell was that for?"
"You need to grow up, Injun," Donghyuck sighed, "He's literally done nothing wrong."
"I know that," Renjun snapped, his chopsticks going through the bottom of the cardboard making them both jump. As the burning liquid ran off the table, the two stood up, Donghyuck quickly grabbing tissues from his bag. He passed them to Renjun, the miserable boy taking them with a small acknowledgement, using them to clean up.

Donghyuck sniggered as he helped clean up, "You sure you know that?"
Renjun rolled his eyes, sighing deeply, "I know it, but I can't help it."

"Just let Jeno love someone," Donghyuck grumbled, taking the tissues away from him and putting them to the side to throw later.

"Why can't that someone be me?" Renjun looked up at him in desperation, whipping around and gripping him by the shoulders.

Donghyuck stared back at him with dead eyes, looking slightly disappointed, Renjun knowing this was just cause he wouldn't move on. He had tried, of course he had. But it's hard to get over someone who you are so determined is the one. Jeno was the perfect guy, he couldn't blame Jaemin for falling for him, but he blamed him for everything else.

Donghyuck sighed, bringing Renjun into his arms as the elder's head fell onto his shoulder in despair. "It's okay, Injunnie," he spoke, voice laced in sadness, "someone out there will love you." He placed a peck on Renjun's head. "Someone out there loves you."  

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