𝐁𝐄𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐈𝐅𝐔𝐋 𝐁𝐎𝐘.

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐞𝐧...

* * *

❝ seems like
i care too much
when i'm all alone
i think that
i'm falling out
you know
what i mean ..?❞

* * *

- two months later -

jae's pov

"c'mon jae, pleasseeee?"

the sappy-sounding request filled with sarcasm has been leaving the boy's mouth for twenty minutes now, and nothing can get him to stop pleading and whining.

"indi, i can't. if i do it for you again, how are you supposed to pass a test?" i murmur, glancing away from my own work over at the boy who simply just rolls his dark eyes, letting out an exasperated sounding sigh as he plops his head against one of my pillows, and for a few seconds i take a moment to admire the sight and all that it could be.

if i could look at him normally- like i'm supposed to, then maybe the sight of him simply laying in my bed wouldn't pull on my heartstrings like it does. recently, he's been doing it a lot more; i'll come home from practice and see the boy just laying in my bed, on his phone as if my room is his own. at first, i was dismayed by it but i realized that it's his way of letting me know that he's comfortable enough to be around me- around my atmosphere.

i guess a lot has changed in two months.
the product of the day at the fair was prolific, it's offspring bringing about a whirlwind friendship between me and the boy i was almost sure hated my guts. now, we spend nearly every single moment together unless i'm in practice or school. that factor hasn't changed; indigo would still rather skip most of his classes unless i pleaded with him to at least attend one, and still prefers to take lunch outside in the parking lot with a blunt; thank god i've learned to simply be pleased with the success that i have gained. i even got him to sit my lunch table with my friends once or twice, though he almost always says nothing unless it's to me. despite his up and down behavior, i find that there's a science to the naturally quiet boy who's eyes do the speaking for him.

he himself has changed, and i would be unsure why if i didn't see the small blue pill yosef cooks in his food every single day, which concered me greatly before i was told indigo agreed to it. i'm happy for him, but i can't help but to hope that the generated optimism his medication gives him isn't the only reason why we're friends, though when the meds wear off he's not much different. only grumpier.

things have been doing well.
too well.

every single day, i spiral further and further as the boy gets more and more comfortable with sleeping in my bed.. stealing my things, playfully slapping me or leaving me with a lingering touch. how much longer am i going to be able to hide the growing affection that i have for him, because i'm not sure it's already hidden- if so, then not well. as sad as it is for me to say myself, i treat indigo better than my own girlfriend- and i wonder if he himself realizes the accidental favoritism- or realizes the stupidly massive crush crush i have on him.