Entropy (Tech x oc)

22

Tw for this chapter: PTSD.

How did it come to this.

Me and the badbatch stood in the engine of the cruiser, all of us holding our breath anxiously as the engine began turning on. We were knocking on deaths door now; praying it wouldn't open it, much less allow us in.

We all healed hands in a circle like a bunch of children playing ring around the rosy, closing our eyes as tightly as we could scrunch them up. Some of us trembled; some of us cried. But we remained strong, defiant against the empire.

"If we put our ex.p..I...o..........n............."

Tech voice entered my ears, but quickly flooded back out. I could see them throwing detonators, but I couldn't move. I have been in near death experiences so many times, I had to wonder, what made this different? The fact that Tech was here? No, he has faced it so many times. The fact that it was one of their own brothers who was doing this? Maybe...

I smiled, but I don't know why. I started seeing Obi wan sitting on the engine, Anakin too. Ahsoka followed, eh was screaming at me, telling me to jump, to do something like the bad batch was. But the devils whispered in my ear, calling me useless. Telling em to stay put, allow the flame to engulf me.

Who knew I would listen to them.

"Theo!" Tech shouted, but it was too light. A flash. A bang. An explosion.

The engine crumbled, a piece of it cracking and falling off, along with it, a few of the bad batch members being flung around to the ground. I couldn't see which. If all happened so fast.

Techs screams echoed throughout my ears, the obnoxious ringing that filled my eardrums pounding on my skull like the beating of a thousand drums. I was trembling a lot now, and it didn't take long for me to figure out I was crying. Why, why was I crying?

Why was I being weak, what was wrong...with me?

At the moment, I only wished for the engine to turn in full thrust and kill me. Disi grate me into nothing but ash. But it wouldn't happen.

As the engine fell, I felt a hand grasp my wrist tightly and firmly, it held me up on a piece of metal just underneath the engine, and then I heard it. The screams and screeched of Crosshair as he was being burnt alive; the curses he sputtered out as he shouted for the "imbeciles" to turn the engine off.

But I also heard Tech scream, I also felt the heat on myself, and could tel, Tech felt it as well.

Tech was closer to it, but I could tell I was hurting all the same. Tech was shielded by his armor and helmet a little, even if it began to melt slightly. I had but a little fabric in between me and the flames of the engine, and my clothes were now tattered and ripped, threatening to combust.

I could feel the searing burn seer through my flesh, slowly frying me to a crisp. It stung so much; the heat overwhelming as I felt me and Tech engulfed in the immense heat. We were below the engine by a couple hundred feet, I couldn't imagine how It would feel inside; let alone Crosshair who was in the direct trajectory of the blue flame.

As me and Tech tightened our hold on each other, I could feel my throat become sore from the screaming. All I could taste was ash, and all I could feel was the heat as if devoured my body, causing me to writhe and cry in pain and discomfort.

Before long however, the engine powered off, letting Tech pull me up onto the edge.

The two of us inhaled sharply, our breathing labored and sharp.

"You ok?" I ask him, causing him to take off his helmet.

"Im quite alright."

He had burns all over, but they didn't seem major. What was more concerning, was the large cuts he obtained from degree flying out of the engine when powered on, or from the explosion and break off. Judging by his expression however, I was much worse.

"Oh my god... Theodosia." Tech muttered, staring at me like a lost puppy. I had to hold in the tears that threatened to spill as I let out labored, slightly huffy breaths. I wouldn't cry. Nothing was wrong

"I'm fine Tech, I'm alive." I smiled softly.

"But yo-"

"Shhhh." I whispered, placing two fingers on his lips. I leaned quickly into his chest, letting his warmth engulf me. Unlike the warmth of the flame, his warmth was comforting. Soft. Warm...

"We are ok, we are safe."

"You have third degree burns in your face! We just tend to it quickly or-"

"Tech please."

He quickly shut up, but wasn't having it. He forced me to my feet, and forced me to keep walking towards the ship that one of the bad batch members flew.

We entered before long, and went tot he cockpit. He stared at me for a while, the silence thick and tense. I couldn't pinpoint what he wanted as he stared me, but he was quick to get the Medkit and come to my aid. Once he finished, he put the supplies away.

"What was that." He stated slightly bitterly, biting the inside of his cheek as if to bite back something else from slipping from his pink, thin lips.

"What was what?"

"As soon as the explosion went off you lost it! You... phased out, you wouldn't respond!"

I feel slightly taken aback by his sudden outburst, but I could understand why. I don't know what happened either...

"You show signs of Posttraumatic stress disorder, but reason would you have to have that!"

Post...

PTSD?

That's ridiculous.

Suddenly images of Ahsoka and Anakin flashed in my head. Fire. Fire. Flash, a flash. Bang. Boom. Whoosh?.. a light, a blinding light. Another, another, dead... a man flying in the air, labored breathing, burning in my skin, my eyesight taken by a flashing light, the sound of airships splitting through the air, lightsabers clashing, boom, boom, flash, another explosion... explosion, some cries for help.

I'm brought back by the shaking of my shoulders, Tech looking at me worriedly.

"Theo, look at me."

I look into his amber eyes, getting lost in the little sparkle they held.

"Your ok, please listen to the sound of my voice."

I listen to the sound of his voice.

It's so smooth, so rich and preppy

"Breath."

I breath. In, hold, out. Just like I was thought for my anxiety all those days ago, back in my first days at the temple. Breath, breath, breath... I feel calm, serene.

I'm safe, I'm safe.

I look up to tech, my heart raising and my eyes glossy with tears threatening to spill. But I refused, I wouldn't let them.

"I'm sorry." I whimpered out, disappointed in myself.

THE EVNTS OF THIS CHAPTER DO NOT PORTRAY PTSD WELL AT ALL. I am horrible at writing serious problems, and I don't have it myself. Please take this as completely fictional, and do not consider this to be how ptsd actually is. Because it's not. I portrayed it horribly, and it deserves way better attention.

Thank you.<3