A letter to y/n (Spock)

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This one will be very difficult bc it's Spock omg.

It's the movie Spock cause I feel like he's got better humor.

You aren't Vulcan, but you were born on Vulcan, and you knew Spock when you two were children.

I'm trying my absolute best on this one.

Inspired by LuckyLuckyClover!

(And yes I had permission to write this)

Y/n, I sometimes wonder if you have a "magic power," because when I look at you, I feel something in my chest, it's buried deep inside there, but I can still feel it.

You have made it a routine to come to my room to say goodnight, but you did not come to my room tonight, and I felt the absence of your presence.

Y/n, you render me unable to function, when you are around me, I am unable to perform correctly, because I am too busy looking at you.

You are a very... excitable person, you are always happy and you always have a smile on your face.

One of the somewhat childish things you do is you always walk up behind me and howl like a wolf.

I always do it back, and I have no idea why.

But I do know that my brain has the most peculiar reaction seeing you smile -and giggle- when I do.

Y/n, you and I have known each other since we were children, you showed me what emotions were, and how to use them, but you knew that I couldn't have emotions, even though I'm half-human.

I always told you, and of course, you always understood, and that's who you are, an amazingly understanding human being.

My most favored memory is that you've taught me a lot growing up, you taught me love, hate, among a lot of other ones since humans have so many emotions.

You even taught me how to read human emotions, and how to give gifts, so I gave you one, it was a Vulcan hairpin, and you fell in love with it.

But then one day, you disappeared, and I never stopped thinking about you.

When I started going to the Academy, I saw you and I recognized the hairpin you were wearing, and I must say, I favored the way you reacted when I had come up to you and told you it was me.

You jumped up and down and then hugged me. You had kissed my cheek, a most peculiar and simple thing, yet it filled me with delight and satisfaction.

Y/n, I know you honor honesty, truthfulness, reliability, dependability, and well- faithfulness above anything else, so I am going to be honest, I've always wanted to feel your lips on my cheek again.

I always think of that day we were reunited.

My most logical mind is always filled with illogical things sometimes, I think of showing you my emotions, something I've wanted to do for a while now.

But I can't, it's against my peoples' way of thinking.

But until then, I will always be thinking of showing you my true feelings, but you know I can't act on them.

Eventually, you did come to my room, but it was 2:27 in the morning, and you were crying, I asked you what was wrong, and you hugged me, not wanting to talk about it.

I hugged you back, curious what made you cry like this.

You never answered my question, but you had cried yourself to sleep in my arms.

I didn't have a roommate yet so I tucked you in the extra bed I had, and you looked sad as you slept.

For a long time, I thought of many reasons why you could've been crying like that.

I could come up with 72 reasons why.

Most of them was that you were very nervous about the exam tomorrow, but you're always anxious for exams, but I've never seen you cry like that.

Maybe you had a bad day, so you decided to come to me for comfort.

Y/n, if only you knew I've loved you since we were children, and I know that you did too.

Y/n, I'm very—but happily—illogically yours.

-Spock

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