Hidden Pain (BoyxBoy-Jastin)

Our Blessings

Jason POV

I smile at Justin as I place my Uno card and yell “UNO GAME!” making his beautiful face turns to frown as he place his remaining cards down on the bedsheet. I coo looking at his face as he pout. Justin has been making progress since he’s been in therapy for 3 weeks now. The psychiatrist will come 3 times a week for his session. Justin still have nighmares and in every session he’s in, it’s getting harder for me and Pattie to seat, listen and watch. Justin slowly but finally told every detail that had happen to him with Mark. Every session will end up with tears and Justin being exhausted for opening up his darkest memories. Justin are not fully recover yet, that would take times and his session still have long way to go but I just hope it will ended soon, I cant take seeing how broken Justin look and feel, how much my uncle has destroyed this amazing person that used to be so bubbly and care free, as to what Pattie had told me.

Pattie had grown closer to me, so as Justin’s close friends and even his crew. They tried to be there for Justin as much as they can. “Awww Jay, stop pouting will ya? I won fair and square.” I grin at him. He still pout. It’s rare to see this side of Justin and when I get the chance, I wont take it for granted and tried to enjoy this moment. “No.. You cheated.” He whine and stutter a bit. I laugh a little. “It’s not my fault, I’m just good at everything I do.” I joked and give him a wink. He roll his big brown eyes playfully. “You’re a meanie.” He pout again making me gaps dramatically. “Am not. I’m the most nicest person ever.” I wave my hand in the trying to prove a point. He let out a chuckle and hide his face on his pillow.

I smile adoringly at his action. Justin is still shy with me and sometimes he doesn’t like to laugh or even chuckle in front of me which make me feel sad. Pattie told me Justin used to not care when people his laugh, he will laugh loudly as he can when he finds things funny but now he’s different. “Why are you hiding Jay jay?” I coo and come closer to him. He whine but still hide his face. “Awww. Come on. You don’t have to be shy with me. I love hearing those beautiful laugh of yours.” I said not caring if I sounded weird saying that to another boy.

He peek his head out cutely with a smile on his face, it really warms my heart. He has the most beautiful smile. Not trying to sound cliché or anything. “You do?” he ask innocently with big brown eyes staring at me. I lay on my back as I motion him to come closer to me. I pulled him gently as he put his head on my chest, I come to know that he loves putting his head there, he always does that when we cuddle. I stroke his hair softly. “Yeah. I do love it. Every bit of it. I think your laugh is beautiful and I’ve also been told that it’s contagious.” I chuckle remembering what Pattie, Jeremy and his friends told me. He sigh softly. “It used to.” He murmur. I furrow my eyebrows knowing he’s feeling sad now. I decided not to say anything and just let the comfortable silent of the room consume us.

“Hey bro!” Ryan and Chaz greeted me as we handshake. They took a seat beside me on the couch. Justin is upstairs sleeping as he just took his medicine that he needs. Pattie was out with Scooter settling something leaving me taking care of Justin. And now his two bestfriend in here to accompany me. Justin is very lucky to have them. “So, how’s Justin doing? Pattie said he’s making progress.” Ryan smiled at me. I nod my head slowly. “Yeah, he’s making progress but we wtill have to take things slowly though. Hey may have open up a little but he’s still not okay inside.” I said frowning and so as the boys. “I hope he gets better soon.” Chaz whisper sounding worried. “Don’t worry guys, as long we’re here for him, he’ll be okay.” I assure them positively.

As we talk and talk, it’s so weird how I just known this guys for only like a month but we talk like we’re already been friend in a long time. They made me feel comfortable and accepted. I never had any close friends before, not even a friend to talk to, my uncle would flip. I look up to Ryan as Chaz continue rambling about how someone cut lines when he went and brought Ice Cream earlier. I guess he’s just weird that way. Ryan suddenly smirk deviously at me. I gave him a confuse look. “You liked him don’t you?” he ask out of nowhere. “What?” I was confused than ever to the question he had asked. “Justin. You liked Justin don’t you?” he ask again, the smirk never left his face. Chaz stop taking immediately. “Yeah, he’s my friend now.. of course I like him…” I said not really knowing where this is going. “No, what we mean you like like him.” Chaz now speak wiggling his eyebrows.

My eyes went wide. “Wh..what are you guys talking about? I’m confuse.” I stutter. Ryan chuckle and put an arm around my shoulder. “Don’t be confuse bro. We know the look you’ve been giving Justin or the way you treat him, or even the way you hold him.” He said casually. “I don’t..” I tried to speak but Chaz cut me out. “Don’t worry man. We’re not judging you or anything. In fact, you have our blessings.” He grinned at me. “Still confuse here.” I look at them scratching my head. “No, your not. You’re just afraid to admit it to us. But that’s okay, we wont force you. For us, Justin’s happiness is all that matters, and he needs that more than anything right now. Especially with everything that had happen to him..” Ryan greeted his teeth remembering what one of his best friend went through.

His eyes went soft as he look at me. “He deserve all the happiness, don’t you think so? And I know he’s been doing better and I also know you’re apart of it. Justin might not be stable enough to realize that now but he will one day and he needs you Jason. We can see that.” He smiled at me like a knowing person. “And how do you guys know that?” I find myself asking. “Because he never lets anyone touch him as they pleased anymore unless he knows and trust that person. But Pattie told me, he cant even go to sleep at night when you’re not with him. And when he finish his session, he will come to you for comfort. Doesn’t that say anything to you?” he ask desperately.

I sigh. “Maybe he’s just used to me comforts him when we’re back at the torture place?” I question not only them but also myself. Chaz sigh dramatically. “Bro, he’s not at that place anymore. He have his whole family member around him now. And he’s trying to forget that evil place, you’re a part of that place, don’t you think he will try to forget you too? but instead he doesn’t. Let me ask you this, did he ever ask you to stay and hold him?” His turn to question me now. I look straight ahead and nod slowly. “Yeah, he did that one time, he ask me to lay down with him at the hospital.. and also one time in his bedroom..” I trail off as the memories running in my head. Ryan claps his hand together making me look at him. “And that’s a sign that he trust you Jason and he also needs you.” Ryan smiled softly. I lick my dry lips and look down at my hand.

“I’m not going to force you to admit your feelings to us Jason.” Ryan speaks up after a few minutes of nobody saying anything. I look up at him as he stare ahead, at nothing. “But I know you care about Jay, I just want you to be sincere with him Jason. I know it’s weird for us to ask that but Justin is our brother, we care and love him too much and seeing him suffered all those times, kills us and I still blame myself for not stopping it from happen, for not being fast enough to end my best friend pain…” he paused and gulp. He smile sadly at me as tears form in his eyes. “We just don’t want to see him in pain anymore. That’s all.” He finish softly and stood up immediately walking fast to the restroom.

I sat there not knowing how to react. Chaz pat my shoulder. “Sorry about that. Ryan still blames himself for Justin get taken away which definitely not his fault. And the fact he was the first one to find out about the .. the abused but he couldn’t help Justin still haunts him till this day.” Chaz whisper sadly. I nod understanding. It must be hard watching your best friend that you care about being in bad situations and you can’t do anything about it.

I look at Chaz with determination in my eyes. “Don’t worry, I will do anything to bring him back to you guys and I will try my best to make Justin forget about the pain.” I promised.

Hey Lovelies!

What do you guys think?

Justin adorable side is coming back slowly.

Isn’t Jason is just the sweetest?

And Ryan stills blames himself. :(

Don’t forget to comment and vote!

Love You guys so much!