Hidden Pain (BoyxBoy-Jastin)

I'm Ready

Jason POV

I stare at the sleeping boy in my arms. I keep playing with his hair in a soothing manner. I couldn't help but smile and blush at what had happen few hours ago. I kissed him! I can't believe I did that and I don't regret one bit. It was my first real kiss. I kiss someone before but I didn't have feeling for that person, like I do for Justin. I care about Justin.

But what makes me smile even more is that he kissed me back. It didn't turn in to a make out session or anything, just a simple sweet kiss. Simple yet perfect. After the kiss, we decided to just lay down on the bed cuddling. Justin didn't say anything but he's not freaking out or having a panic attack. He was calm. He kept snuggling in to my neck and wrap his arms around my waist as if I'm going to disappear.

I lean down and peck his cheek. I'm never going to leave him. He's important to me. I think I love him. Yeah. I love him. And I will never stop showing that I do. I will wait until he recovers and finally felt the same. I know he have some kind of feeling for me. If not, he won't be freaking out like that, he won't feel confuse and scared. I don't want to push him though, I'm willing to wait until he's ready and I don't mind how long that will take.

"Jase?" a small voice interrupt my thought as I look down at the big brown eyes. I smile lightly and kiss near his mouth softly. "Hey beautiful. You're awake so early." I said. He sigh a little snuggle in to my chest. "I don't feel like sleeping no more. How about you? How long have you been awake?" he asked. "Just few hours ago. I couldn't really sleep." I told him truthfully. "Why? Was I crushing you or something?" he question frowning a bit. "No baby boy. I just couldn't sleep that's all." I chuckle at his cuteness.

He stare at me still frowning. "Then something must be wrong. You love sleeping. Something must be bothering you." He said wide eyes. I laugh which result him to frown even more. I caress his cheek still chuckling. "Your too cute you know. I just couldn't sleep because I cant help but to think about our kiss last night. It was so magical." I told smiling adoringly. His frown disappear as his cheek turns shade of pink. "Ohh." He look down at my chest clearly embarrass to look me in the eye anymore.

"Hey baby boy. There's nothing to be embarrass about." I lift his chin up. He bite his lips signaling how nervous he's feeling right now. "Was.. was it that magical?" he asked still blushing like crazy. I nuzzle my nose with his which he scrunch them immediately. "It was beautiful. It was so magical." I told him honestly. He didn't say anything but just cuddling to my chest. We lay there in a very comfortable quietness. "You don't have to rush you know." I speak up first and not waiting for his reply I continue. "You don't have to rush with your feelings. Don't ever force yourself to think too much about it. Don't work yourself too much like you did last night. I hate seeing you like that. I know it's hard for you Justin. Especially on trusting people. And I'm not planning or forcing you to figure out what you really feel. We have plenty of time for that." I smile kissing his forehead.

He stare at me for a while. "But that wont be fair for you. You're always here for me and it's just stress me up that I couldn't think straight or make the best decision. I know that I need you but..." his voice crack. "Hey hey. I told you not to work yourself out anymore. You should be focusing on your recovering which means on yourself. Not me, not anybody else." I peck his lips.

"But what if you got tired of waiting? What if by the time I finally recover and know my true feelings than you're not here anymore? I'm scared Jase. I don't want that." He told me brokenly. I couldn't help but gathered some tears in my eyes. No one ever needed me like this beautiful boy in my arms. I never felt important since the day my parents died, the day I got taken away by Mark. And here it is, the boy that I save and the most beautiful human being I've ever met needed me in his life.