Hey yall..so I just want to say thank you for all the support and everything. You guys are the best, and it's amazing that I don't even know you, but I love you guys so much (ironic HUH?) well...recent events have made me so emotional that I have been drawing so much and ughhhhh..I would've posted something but...yah know. Let's not talk about it! Maybe if I ignore it it'll go away..(I wish). Anyways here's a bit of chapter four...it's a teeny time skip, two weeks almost. This will go under editing soon too..I don't want yall reading this with mistakes in it lol..anyways love you guys!!! Xxx
P.s.
Would've been updated sooner but I got put in the hospital..ughhh. But now I have time for a ton. XD
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Liam was constantly tired now. He knew it was a sign of depression, and he should probably get his meds refilled, but he wanted to get better on his own. Be stronger for Zayn.
The bags under his soft brown eyes showed his tired he was. They showed how his thoughts kept him awake at night eating away at his heart, if you can call it that anymore. Liam feels barely alive, but he doesn't feel dead. He just feels so hollow in his chest, like there's no heart pumping blood into his body.
He lay in bed, staring at the sleeping figure beside him, desperately wanting to reach out and touch him-hold him. Liam wanted to kiss Zayn's lips, entangle his legs with his and breathe in his scent. Deep down, he knew his husband didn't want to be touched by him, Liam just didn't know why.
A shaky sigh escaped from his lips as he turned on to his side, scooting closer to Zayn. Daringly he reached his hand out and ran his trembling fingers up and down Zayn's inked arms. Liam moved his hand up towards his husbands face and rubbed his lips with his thumb, "I'll change myself for you Zayn, I promise I'll be what you deserve," he whispered in a low tone, sincerity seeping in his voice.
Liam rolled out of bed and walked over to the full length mirror that stood in the corner of the room, his reflection stared back at him, but he didn't recognize himself. Hesitantly he pulled his shirt over his head and inhaled sharply. He cringed at his pudgy figure in the mirror and traced his fingers over the scar that went from the bottom of his abdomen and just past the top of his belly button.
His clutched his stomach at the memory with the scar. Each time it happened it got larger, and so did the spaces between him and Zayn. Liam bit his lip and shook the burning tears away from his eyes, "Don't fuck this up Liam." He spoke to himself, glaring back at his reflection in the mirror.
The scar was ragged and ugly, it was a different color from his normal skin, and raised around the edges. To Liam (and Zayn obviously) his body shape only made him look more unappealing. The man reached up to his cheeks and grabbed them, not liking how chubby they were, and how easily they could be grabbed. He did the same with his sides, and thighs, wishing they were toned up.
Liam often wonders if he hadn't got pregnant at eighteen if Zayn would still be with him. Probably not, as bad as it sounds. He knows that shortly after they were married he had flings with other men, and the occasional woman. Liam never said anything though, he's not stupid, but he is in love with Zayn. He always has been, and always will be.
-(Bit of a flash back ) -
Liam remembers the night like it was just yesterday, the dark summer moon casted a pretty silhouette through the curtains, the windows open slightly so you can smell the honey suckles growing outside. The much younger boy was sitting on the bed, legs crossed, hand resting on his small baby bump, a smile spread across his face as he looked down on the growing infant inside him.
