[EDITING]𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐓𝐨 𝐁𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬

🥀꧁9꧂🥀

ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣: 09

🖤

Anaira's Pov

My eyes wandered off into space as everything seemed to blur itself around me, for the very first time in my life I had screamed at my parents. For the very first time, I had doubted them. I doubted them for making good decisions for me, I doubted their intentions for me, I doubted their love towards me.

The entire week that I spent trying to make myself understand all the advice and mental notes went straight down the drain when I screamed at them right after the Oberois left. I was shattered and I hated the fact it was my very existence that was sold off.

I am not a lamb, I am not a piece of meat. I am a human. And my own parents forgot the said fact when they signed me off before they even conceived me.

I had locked myself in my room out of sheer anger and frustration, the entirety of the situation was swallowing me up, I was breathing yet I felt suffocated, I was sitting in my room yet I felt lost in an unknown place. Anger, confusion, hurt were all I felt. How could anyone do this? Either my parents were selfish or I was, I don't know and I don't care.

I felt powerless and I hated the feeling, all my life I had felt powerless against my own insecurities and now that everything has been turned upside down, I am utterly and cruelly shattered. The man wasn't super old and I was thankful for that but was I thankful that I got someone handsome? No, I wasn't one bit relieved. Having a charming exterior doesn't mean the interior would be just as charming.

I did not want to get married, it was my choice and it was snatched away from me.

My love for my parents can't just turn into hatred overnight. But all I need right now is some me-time. Paint my nails, cut my hair, eat as much as I want to, sleep the entire day or cry over titanic-I want to do something that tells me I have enough control over my life. It wasn't easy for me growing up, yes I look like a food lover but that is not the case. Eating once terrified me, it terrified me so bad that I was just a sack of skin and bones. The constant bullying in my school days, people called me a pencil and I fucking loathed the feeling.

My parents didn't trust me enough to take care of myself, I always had to be babysat by one of my brothers. Heck Karan, the brother who was just a year older than me was supposed to 'take care' of me. I hated it when I was to be supervised in even lighting a candle, I hated it when my brothers pitied me, I hated it that I was so shy, I hated it that I had no friends and had to tag along with my brothers to play.

I hated who I was and that ultimately led to an eating disorder, I won't go into details but yes those years were horrible going through. I just craved some control over my life. My breath wavered as I thought all about my struggles in the past but that is exactly what they were-struggles.