I was bored ok-
Characters: Britain, Canada, America, Australia, New Zealand, France
Britain: There is no discrimination in this house, you all annoy me.
~~~
Britain: Have you seen America anywhere?
Canada: No, I haven't, wh—
*boom*
*crash*
*thud*
*all noises come from other room*
Britain: found him
~~~
New Zealand: How could you lose the remote?
Australia: What makes you so sure I lost it?
New Zealand: Uhh, 'cause you're you.
Australia: Hey, just because I lost that video game...
New Zealand: And the toothpaste, and the football, and the waffle iron...
Australia: Things disappear. How am I supposed to know where they go.
New Zealand: Well how am I supposed watch TV without a remote?
Britain: *slamming his book shut, angry* Simple, you just get up and change the channel.
~~~
Britain: I don't have the energy for this
France: For what?
Britain: *gestures vaguely*
~~~
America: You're telling me Julius Caesar, who has been dead for well over 70 years, made this salad?
Britain: Technically, you aren't wrong with that number, but I just hate it.
~~~
Britain: While I'm gone, America, you're in charge.
America: YES!
Britain: *whispered to Canada* Canada, you're secretly in charge.
Canada: Obviously.
~~~
Britain, answering the phone: hello?
America: it's America
Britain: what did he do this time?
America: no, it's me, it's America
Britain: oh
Britain: what did you do this time?
~~~
Britain: you're on thin ice
Australia: im on the floor
Britain: its an expression
Australia: its a carpet
~~~
Britain: what was that sound?
New Zealand: my shirt fell
Britain: it sounded heavier than that...
New Zealand: i was in it
~~~
Britain: America, you're in charge while I'm away.
America: Alright, I'm your man.
Britain: Don't do anything stupid.
America: Ok I'm kinda your man.
Britain: And keep the twins out of trouble.
America: You need another man.
~~~
America: Dad, are you mad at me?
Britain: What did you do?
~~~
Britain: what's the one thing I told you not to do?
Australia: burn down the house.
Britain: and what did you do?
Australia: hang out with Brazil
Britain: and...?
Australia: burn down the house.
~~~
America: Why aren't there adult sized playgrounds? Like everything is the same as a kids playground but bigger? Why do we not have those?
Britain: Theme parks.
America: But you have to pay for those.
Britain: That's the adult part.
America: Son of a-
~~~
Australia: I'm telling you it's spelled "S-C-H-O-O-L" not "S-C-H-O-O-L"
New Zealand: I don't understand how you can think you're right when you're being so stupid!
Britain: What? You are both spelling the word same and it's correctly spelt.
Australia and New Zealand in unison: He put the wrong "O" in front!
Britain: I can't believe I fathered these idiots.
~~~
America: who the fuck
Britain: language
America:
America: whom the fuck
Britain: No
~~~
Australia: I wish we all had infinity dollars.
Britain: That'd wreck the economy.
Australia: I just-
Britain: Go to your room until you understand inflation.
~~~
America: Dad! Do you know what day today is?
Britain: Well, based on the fact that yesterday was the birthday of legendary Dutch flautist Frans Brüggen, and a week ago was October 24th, I'd say today is-
America: It's Halloween. Just say it's Halloween.
~~~
Britain: America, it's 3am. Come to bed
America: all odd numbers have an 'e' in them
Britain: America, it's 3am.
America: t-h-r-E-E
Britain: GO TO S-L-E-E-P BEFORE YOU GET B-E-A-T
America: You ever dip your entire oreo in milk except for the part where you're holding it and feel like Thetis dipping newborn Achilles into the River Styx leaving him invulnerable everywhere except for his heel?
Britain, groans and puts his hands over his face: Go back to what you were doing
~~~
Australia: That's when I thought to myself, 'Don't think, Steve. Act.'
Britain: So you weren't thinking.
Australia: Not at all. I cannot emphasize enough how little I was thinking.
~~~
America: Life is meaningless, why am I even alive?
Canada: what happened?
Britain: I didn't stop at McDonald's
~~~
British: *sees the building is flooded*
British: okay. The only explanation is that I'm still asleep, dreaming that the building is flooded. What does it mean? What does it mean?
Australia, floating by on a door: It probably means you're under a lot of stress because this is not a dream and the building is flooded.
~~~
YOU ARE READING
CountryHumans Incorrect Quotes
Fanfictionyeah uhm.... enjoy some skits, as me and my friends call them. I don't even know what characters are gonna be in here so.... hope it's good! Updates are slow but they will happen!! Also Disclaimer I don't support any of the bad things in this book i...
