Identity V

Run!

Tw: puking, mentions of puking
- - - - - - - - - -
Lucas Diary
This stupid brat. Jumping around and acting like nothing's happening!
It was just upsetting, why is she acting like this is all just a bunch of nothing...

I didn't know Vera very well yet but I could already tell that I disliked her, no that's an understatement, I hated that woman to the guts!
The thought of Vera made me mad, even stressed and due to that my nausea startet to hit.

It's caused because of my brain damage, all this damage that this one little experiment brought to me... But that's a different story..

I wanted to vomit so badly right now I just wanted to get rid of this nasty feeling,that desire seemed more important than escaping to me in that moment.
I put my arm on one of these cracked walls, and faced the floor with an open mouth, hoping that maybe this time I can satisfy my desire to puke.
But as always, nothing happened.

I stayed in this position for a while until I started to hear footsteps from afar.
I raised a brow, didn't I tell Nair to fix another machine?
As I said, what a stupid brat.

Why didn't she just follow my rules?

When I used the work with Tracy Reznik, she acted the exact same, always doing her own thing and never the things I told her to or that needed to be done.
It lead to endless arguments and discussions, but I was actually never really mad at her.

This may sound sick but sometimes.. I just enjoyed having a little fight with her, her emotions always changed from upset to angry, then to ashamed and then sad.
After that last bit of emotion, the last drop of sadness and the last, tiniest tear, I used to comfort her.

During these fights I strangely felt something like pleasure, maybe even joy?

I probably sound like an asshole right now, but it was just so entertaining watching the expressions on her face and her emotions change due to the things I said or did, no matter if I meant it or not.
In most cases I did not.

When it happened, it felt like an experiment.
Just like with science , chemistry, all of that.
I add something and she reacts.
Look at this however you want, but you can't deny that it's fascinating.

I slowly started to stand straight again and tilted my head a bit while squinting my eyes.

I couldn't really tell who that person in the distance was, but one thing was sure, it was not Vera.
My nausea got so bad at this point that it caused another strong head ache that I felt till my neck.
I bit my lip and resisted the urge to puke again.

I breathed loudly with the hope to make it go away, but nothing happened.
I looked at that person again and saw no one familiar.
Right as I started to see some details, like the long braid or something that looked pretty long and sharp in their right hand , my sight got blurry and my headache got worse.
This fucking brain damage, I would have rather lost a limb than this bullshit.

I closed my eyes and suddenly dropped to the floor.

Now standing on my knees and hands I now really needed to vomit.
I gave a croaking sound from me before it all came out and and splashed to the floor.

I felt disgusting, more than that, I felt weak...

I opened my eyes again and saw that this strange person was now only a few meters away from me.
I now could see the dead looking face with the piercing eyes, and an umbrella with blood all over it.

Out of reflex I immediately stood up and started sprinting out of the factory.
I couldn't really run in a straight line, almost hit my head a few times due to my headache and nausea, but the adrenaline made my body feel better and better every second.

I ran and ran, I didn't even look back and just ran over this whole place.
Sweat was dripping down my face and my breathing turned louder and louder until it turned to some strange mixture out of sighs and painful moans.
The cold air completely filled my lungs, it felt like a thousand little needles were stabbed into my throat and I was choking on my own blood.

My sight got worse and worse and I didn't know how long I could run like that anymore. I started to scream, not out of fear but out of pain. My head hurted so bad that it made tears roll down my cheeks and my legs started to feel like useless toothpicks.

And so I slowed down, while this strange being was getting closer and closer.
I wanted to look behind me, I wanted to see how close it was and what it wanted.
Hey, maybe it didn't even want to hurt me! But what was I thinking...
The blood dripping from the umbrella, Patricia screaming over this whole place and Aesop being missing for a while...

This thing definitely wanted to hurt me,
It wanted to kill me.

I tried to run faster again but it was useless and my nausea didn't get better at all. No it was even getting worse, but I tried to pull myself together.

I would make on tiny mistake, if I would fall or trip or run too slowly it would get me, and I'll be dead pretty soon.

I suddenly heard another loud noice echoing around the place and it hit me,

another cipher machine got finished!
I guess Vera really figured out how it worked and in that moment, while being chased by some murderous creature I just hoped that she met the others and told them how it's done because I was sure that an embalmer and an enchantress wouldn't know shit about machines.

The sound made adrenaline pump through my veins again and god damn it felt so pleasing I forgot about my nausea for a moment,

I even forgot about this disgusting creature behind me, until it took a swing at me with this huge peaky umbrella it held in one of its hands.

The sharp end ripped my shirt from my neck to my rips, and not just that but it also teared my flesh apart.
I always thought my brain damage was bad, that I will never feel more pain in my entire life than from this fucking accident that caused all the damage years ago, the accident that gave me nausea and the feeling that I was a secret psychopath
and who knows, maybe I am.

But all these worries faded away with a simple hit of this strange being.

I was feeling how I wanted to give up, to surrender to let this thing kill me since all of this was hopeless. There was no way that I was going to survive this,
I may be good at machines but not at running away from literal murderers while having the worst nausea attack of my whole life.

I felt how I was starting to slow down even more,
I was about to fall to the ground and I had already accepted my fate,

Until

I've heard another machine being finished and the beautiful sound of it being fixed, which sounded like sweet music in my ears gave me the need to run again,
and so I did.

I realised that we only needed to fix 2 more machines and then we could finally get out of this hell and hopefully it would be forever.

The thought of escape made me smile, it even made me let out a small laugh and I knew for sure that I must have looked crazy in that moment.
A killer was chasing me, Blood was running down my spine and I ran like a crazy maniac who forgot how to use his legs.

I started to spit blood and wondered if I will die today, but I pushed the thought away because I needed to concentrate on surviving first..
- - - - - - - - - - -

Hello again! I thought the cursive font was low-key annoying so I won't use it anymore for long passages, like whole diary entries I think🤔
Thx for reading ^-^