Chapter 16: Is This A Joke?

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There I went, as I saw that there was in fact a locker room, that even had to words basketball on it, that did in fact thankfully let me know that I had in fact gone the right way that I had in fact needed to go in the very first place any ways, as I let out quite a bit of a heavy sigh to my self all at once, as I did my best to try to calm my self down, as I got my mind, and I got my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts that I had in fact been thinking on long before now once again.
Now that it was that I had in fact seen Andrew, I now all of the sudden began to start to realize as to the fact that I did in fact know that Xavier might be right that I could not get on to the Varsity team this year, which I felt like it was stupid of me to even think that I could, as I knew that I was 14, and I was sure that those guys were 18, as they were over a foot taller than me at that, never the less, once again.
I did my best to try to keep my self as calm as I felt like I possibly could, as I then all of the sudden began to start to just head over to wher it was that the locker room was right now. I knew that I at the very least needed to show that I could go play on the JV team, as much as I did not want to, I knew that it was in fact still my freshman year, and I knew that Xavier was right, and that I needed to train some more, and that I still had 3 more years of high school after this season ended.
I felt like I was better than ever when it came to basketball, but I was just a little bit scared as to the fact that I felt like I might not get a chance on the team, when ever it was that they saw how short it was that I even was in the very first place any ways, once again. I knew that I just needed to keep my self as calm as I felt like I possibly could, as I knew Xavier was right, and that I had to have faith in my self, if I wanted to go far in life.
Some thing he had told me he had failed to do after it was that he had got injured, as he had said that he had made the mistake of fucking his entire life over due to all of that. I had seen him play a bit, and I could see in fact the talent that it was that he did in fact have in the very first place any ways, but sadly enough though, he was right, and he had not had faith in him self to bounce back stronger than ever after all that he had gone through.
I grunted quite a bit to my self all at once, as I did my best to try to get my mind, and get my focus off of all of the rest of the thoughts that I had in fact been thinking on long before now, as I just got my eyes back on to the locker room, as I knew that I needed to be in there before it was too late for me, as I knew that I had already wasted enough time as it was already, as I knew that I could not waste any more time than I had already had.
I shook my head all at once, as I got my mind on the fact that I had just seen a guy that was simply just a little bit taller than me, as he did in fact begin to start to go right on ahead and begin to start to walk in to the locker room, all at once, as it did in fact kind of give me a bit of some hope, as to the fact that if that guy was trying, than perhaps I might have a chance to get in, all at the exact same time as well, once again, as I then all of the sudden nodded to my self all at once.
As soon as it was that I had in fact felt quite a bit better about all of this, that was when I then all of the sudden began to start to open the door to the locker room that was right in front of me all of the sudden, as I then immediately heard a lot of chatter, and a lot of voices that were all around me right now, as it felt quite a bit chaotic if I was not going to lie to my self either, as I knew that it was in fact quite a bit cold out side, but right now, in this room, it felt burning hot.
That was of course due to the fact that I could see that there seemed to be at least 50 people that were in this locker room right at this very moment in time as well, as I was quite a bit scared, and I was quite a bit afraid as to just what it was that was going on right now, as I knew for sure that Xavier had not told me that it was going to be this bad, as I felt like if I was competing for a 15 man spot on the roster, than I for sure would not have a chance, as I felt like I for sure would get over looked.
I breathed in quite a bit heavily to my self all at once, as I did in fact do my best to get my mind, and get my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts that I had in fact been thinking on long before now, as I then all of the sudden did my best to try to keep my self as calm as I felt like I possibly could, as I just went back on the further edge, where there were not so many people right now.
I was quite a bit scared that a bunch of people were about to go after me, and make fun of me, due to the fact that I was short, as it seemed like every single person that was in this locker room right now, was taller than me, by about 3-4 inches at the bare minimum, as I was quite a bit scared if I was not going to lie to my self either, once again, as I did my best to try to keep my self as calm as I felt like I possibly could in the mean time, as I just stared down at the ground.
No one seemed to be picking on me what so ever, luckily enough, as I wondered if that was due to the fact that they had not even noticed me, though I was fairly certain that a few people at the very least had in fact noticed me as soon as it was that I had in fact headed in to the room, all at the exact same time as well, none the less, as I did my best to try to keep my self as calm as I felt like I possibly could in the mean time, once again.
I seemed to just stare off in to the darkness, and in to the distance of the ground that was beneath me for just a little bit of some time, until I then all of the sudden began to start to hear the familiar voice of Andrew, as he began to start to speak to who ever it was that was around him right now, as his voice was obnoxiously loud if I was not going to lie to my self either. I did my best to try to just stay calm how ever, as I then began to start to lift my head up to Andrew, all at the exact same time as well, never the less.
Andrew much to my surprise was in the middle of the entire crowd that was in fact in the locker room right at this very moment in time as well, as I did my best to try to keep my self as calm as as I felt like I possibly could once again, as I did my best to get my mind, and get my focus off of the rest of those other thoughts that I had been thinking about the guy long before now, as I knew that I did not know the guy what so ever, none the less.
The guy seemed to have quite a bit of a happy and quite a bit of a chill smile on his face, all at the exact same time as well, none the less, as I then all of the sudden began to start to get my mind, and get my focus more on the fact that he was in fact talking to every one that was in fact in the locker room right at this very moment in time too, as I did in fact begin to start to listen as to what it was that he even had to say to everyone in the very first place any ways none the less.
"Alright everyone is are you all ready for the season? We're going to States this year, am I right?!" He yelled to every one that was in the rocker room right at this very moment in time as well. I did my best to try to call my self down, as I was not all too sure as to what just what it was that I had been thinking on it before now. I felt quite a bit bad for thinking that way about the guy if I was not going to lie to my self either. I had not known the guy at all, sadly enough.
I just did my best to call my self down, as I stared at the guy for a little bit longer, as I saw everyone in the locker room start to get hyped. It was clear that every one thought big things of him, as I kind of wondered if I would ever have teammates I would think that way about me someday. I just did my best to get my mind off of all that stuff, as I simply just stared at every one that was in the room right at this very moment of time.
They all seem to be very happy as I wish I could feel the same way as all of them did. Sadly that was not the case as I felt like I had a lot of stress and a lot of anxiety that was building up in me right now. I knew that was exactly what it was that Xavier had been trying to get me to stop doing. I could not lie to my self I felt quite a bit guilty due to that, once again as I got my mind and my focus off of all that. I simply just saw every one cheering on him.
Everyone was happy right now and I felt like I should be the exact same way as they all were right now. I knew that I should not feel guilty or greedy about all this, as I knew that sports were always a team game. I kind of shook my head a bit to my self, cuz I just seemed to look away from all of them all at once, is that was due to the fact that I all the sudden began to start to hear some one else begin to start speaking from the other side of the locker room all once, as I then all the sudden began to start to turn my head all the way over to them.
Much to my surprise I saw it was the shorter guy, that was just a little bit taller than me, as I saw that he much unlike the rest of the people that were here right now, was not wearing a jersey. I kind of dipped my head a bit low to the ground as I felt a a bit disappointed about all that, as I realized that he was not a player on the team as it seemed like he was more just a trainer. I kind of shook my head to my self all at once how ever, as I knew that I still had a chance on the JV team.
I lifted in my head up, as I knew I still need to be strong right now, as I knew this was exactly what Xavier told me that I need to be. I stared at the guy for just a little bit of some time, as I then all the sudden nodded to him all at once, even though I knew he's not paying me any sort of attention right now, as I was sure that his attention was on some one like Andrew right now, as I knew he was the team captain.
I just blinked my eyes a few times, as I got my mind and my focus off all that, as I saw that he had quite a bit of a happy smile on his face just as Andrew had, is this all felt so fake to me if I was not going to lie to my self. I kind of rolled my eyes a bit to myself, all at once is I just seem to stare at the trainer that was right in front of me right now as he nodded back to every one to make sure they were all paying attention to him. Of course every one did in fact nod right back over to the guy, to let him know that they were all paying attention to him.
Now that it was that he saw that every one was in fact paying attention to him right now, he then all the sudden began to start to continue to speak to everyone just as he had been doing before, now that it was that he knew that everyone was in fact listening to us to just what it was that he even had to say to all of us in the very first place any ways, as I did my best to keep my self as calm as I possibly could as I too did in fact being in the start listen as to just what it wasn't even had to say to us all the exact same time as well.
"Alright, is every one ready to get all this started?" He said everyone, as he had the same smile that he had on his face long before now once again. I just did my best to keep my self as calms I possibly could, as I saw that every one in the locker room was in fact nodding right back to him to let him know that they all wer in fact ready to get all of this started once again, as I just did my best to try to keep my self as calm as I possibly could, as I did the exact same thing that every one else was doing right now.
I still kind of felt like I could not help but to be a little bit scared if I was not going to lie to myself either. There was a lot of tall people in here and I was probably the shortest person in this entire locker room, as I just blinked my eyes a few times as I did my best to get my mind off of all those other thoughts, once again. As soon as it was that the trainer had turned his head around, that was when every one began to start to follow him, is it was clear that we were about to go into the basketball court, all the exact same time as well none the less.
I nodded it quite a bit to myself at once, once again as I to begin to start follow as just what it was that everyone was doing right at this very moment in time any ways. I was probably the last person behind everyone else right now, which I really did not care about if I was not going to lie to my self either, as it kind of calmed me down a bit, to know that no one was staring at me right now.
I was not sure how I was going to get used to the crowds and the very loud stadiums if I was not going to lie to my self if I could not get used to this, as I knew that this was my own team. Though I could not be thinking that just yet as I had to get on the team first. I kind of shook my head a bit to myself as I got my mind and my focus off all the rest of those thoughts, as I cracked a bit of a fake smile even though I knew that no one was paying me any sort of attention right now.
Just as soon as it was that we had begun to start to go into the gym, that was when I all the sudden began to start to see the bright lights that were all around me. So I was not talking about like bright lights, that came to the fact that I was on the main stage right now, as it was more just the bright lights of the room that we are about to head in to, at that none the less.
I did my best to get my mind and my focus off all that all at once, as I just shook my head a bit to my self at once, as I cracked quite a bit of a smile on my face once again, now that I knew that every thing was going to be okay. Every thing was going to be fine and I knew it, has all of us began to start walking into the stadium, as I already heard a few basketballs dribbling, as it was clear that someone had already gotten some of the balls.
I still was a little bit scared to shoot if I was not going to lie to my self either, even though I knew that there was the main thing that the coach was looking for, as I doubt there was going to be very much passing which was my specialty. I felt like the odds were all against me right now, which was not the best way to be thinking right now if I was not going to lie to my self either. I just did my best to try to keep myself comes up possibly good.
I blinked my eyes a few times I just kept on going into the stadium. Just like the rest of every one else is doing right now once again. I knew that everything was going to be okay now that I saw a ball roll over to me. That was a bit afraid that someone was going to start looking for it. It seemed like no one was paying me any sort of attention once again, which kind of scared me if I was not going to lie to my self, as I was not all too sure as to how I was going to get on the team if no one was paying any sort of attention.
I shook my head a bit to my self all at once once again, as I then began to start to hear some one being speak right next to me. It kind of almost seem like they were talking to me for a second, though I knew that was not the case at all, as I got my mind and my focus off of all those thoughts, as I just kept on going on ahead with what it was I was even trying to do in the very first place anyways none the less.
Though I could not help but to turn my head over to the person that was speaking right at this very moment time any ways. They were speaking to one of their friends if I had to guess, as I saw I did not seem like their friend wanted to be here at all, as perhaps he had kind of made them come with him to join the team. I kind of rolled my eyes right to myself as I stared at the guy for just a bit of some time, as I saw his friend nod to him to let him know that he was effect paying attention as to just what it was that he even had to say to him in the very first place any ways.
As I saw him do that as a bit of a return back to his friend, I too nodded a bit to myself even though I knew that they were paying me no such sort of attention right now. I just did my best to keep myself as calm as I feel like I could possibly do, as I begin to start to listen as to just what it was that the guy even had to say to his friend in the very first place any ways, once again.
"All right bro we just go to the middle of the court... That is where the coach is going to split us in a separate spots." The guy said to his friend as it was good news to know for myself at the very least, cuz I had not been all too sure what it was that I should even be doing right now, that kind of just shook my head a bit to my self all at once, as I did in fact follow with what it was that they were doing right now, which was of course the fact that they were going to the middle of the court right now.
I blinked my eyes a few times all at once, as I saw that the coach was in the middle of it, at least I had to guess that it was the coach. He was about 6'5 if I had to guess, as I was sure that he had played tons of basketball back in his days as it made sense as to why he was in fact the coach of this team. I had kind of wished that the coach of this team was the same coach that had coached my father, but I had found out that that guy had retired about 5 years ago and gone to something else in his life which I felt like I could not blame him for if he really was that old.
I kind of just shook my head a bit to my self at once, as I looked on ahead of the coach that was smiling just like the trainer, and just like Andrew had done, when it was that they had first gotten here. It all felt so strange to me it all felt so fake if I was not going to lie to my self. I just breathed them quite a bit to my self with it in my best to call my self down all at the exact same time as well none the less.
I seem to just stare at the coach for just a little bit of some time, as it seemed like the coach should even notice that I was staring at him as well, unlike everyone else that had when I had been staring at them. The coach kind of tilted his head a bit, as he had a bit of a smile on his face as well, which I hoped was a good thing at the very least.
At least so far the smiles have been a good thing though I was not sure if that was going to be the case in this case at all, as I did my best to call myself down, as I got my mind and my focus off of all those other thoughts once again, as I just blinked my eyes a few times, as I was not sure as to just what it was it was even going on right now.
The coach kind of shook his head which had me even more confused, as I told him my head of it towards him as I was not all too sure as to just what it was that he was even getting at right at the very mind time in the very first place any ways. The coach seem to be amused about something and I just was not all too sure is it just what it was that he thought was so funny this very moment in time any ways.
I stared at him for just a little bit longer, is he then all the sudden began to start to speak to me, which I knew for a fact that he was for sure speaking to me right now, as he was staring at me right in my eyes right now. I was not all too sure if this was a good thing or a bad thing just yet, as I blink my eyes few times and I felt like the best thing for me to do was to go on ahead and on back to him to let him know that I was in fact paying attention as to just what it was that he was about to say to me in the very first place anyways none the less.
The coach should not seem to care about that at all, she just kept the same smile that he had on his face before hand, I see then all of a sudden began to start to go right on ahead and speak to me, as I did in fact be going to start to listen as to what it was that I even had to say to me in the very first place any ways once again.
"What is this? Is this some sort of joke?"

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