The Patchwork Hearts

Chapter TWENTY TWO

Holden

I dream about Maya that night. I wake up sweating, remembering she's not mine and I don't know her anymore. It's not fair because I'd finally stopped missing her and dreaming of her, when I was in LA. I was drinking and partying and bringing home girls. I was having a great time, but I also trying to force myself to forget about Maya. I should have known this would happen when I came back.

   Landon is cooking pancakes when I go out to the kitchen. My head hurts. I drank too much and didn't sleep enough. But the breakfast my brother is making smells amazing.

   "I'm still shocked you can cook," I say, walking in. Honey is already at my feet, so I reach down and pet her head.

   "I had to learn. You left and mom was working two jobs." He doesn't say this with any mean undertone, but I feel guilty anyway.

   Landon stays at the house with me almost every weekend, and lives in the dorm during the week. We have lunch or dinner on Sundays with mom and Eddie. It's nice to have a routine. It's awesome to know I see my brother every weekend and my mom whenever I want. I work on commissioned pieces or my own work during the day and mostly spend my evenings alone. I don't mind it that way. I got my dog, a month after I got back to Boothbay. I just drove by the shelter and decided to go in and then I brought home Honey the same day. She's a two year old Shepard mix and she's the best.

   A couple hours later, Landon is making plans to see his girlfriend after dinner - before he goes back to his dorm - and I'm waiting for the text about what time to meet at mom's. Honey is laying by my feet, like always. She must know that I'm feeling a bit off today.

   My mind goes back to Maya. Of course. I remember exactly how she fits in my arms and how my heart always beats a bit too fast when I see her. I was thirteen when I knew she was more than my best friend. I didn't ask her on a date until she was fourteen and I was fifteen. We sat on the beach, twenty feet from my house, and had a picnic. That was when I told her I liked her more than a friend and I wanted her to be my girlfriend. She wasn't surprised in the slightest and she told me she wanted that, too. So I kissed her. We dated for over four years. She was the only girl I kissed, touched, or had touch me. Maya was my life. And I let her leave.

   Dinner at 5pm. Eddie's doing steaks. A text from my mom comes in and Honey jumps up at the buzzing sound of my phone.

   Sounds good. See you then, I send back.

   You'll take Landon back to school after?

   Of course.

  Landon, Honey and I pile into my truck around 4:30P.M, after I shower and get dressed. Eddie's house is only ten minutes away, like pretty much everything else. I always bring Honey because she gets lonely, and my mom loves her.

   "This dog thinks she owns this truck," Landon says seriously, pressed up against the window. Honey is a big dog and needs a lot of space.

   "Yeah well, it's her truck too," I laugh.

   "Hold, I was thinking... what is your plan?" my brother asks a few minutes later, looking at me.

   "About what?"

   I turn onto the main road and start driving towards the harbour. My window is down and Honey is now sitting on Landon's lap. He's petting her head. He pretends he doesn't love her, but I know he does.

   "You know what." He won't say her name. I'm glad he doesn't say her name, actually.

   "There's no plan," I tell him, focusing on driving.