The Patchwork Hearts

Chapter FORTY ONE

Maya

I am not confused, not even a little bit, on Sunday night with Marcus.

   That drive back to his house takes like four minutes, but it is excruciating. He is teasing me with  his words and touch and we are barely inside the house when he picks me up and presses me against the hallway wall. He is kissing me so hard that I pretty much forget things were weird between us at all. When he carries me through to the back room and sits, with me facing him in his lap, he pulls back and grins.

   "This spot is familiar."

   "Yeah," I agree, my mind racing back to the first time we had sex.

   And then we are removing clothes and our mouths and hands are everywhere. I bite his neck as he enters me, so fast that I don't even realize or care that he didn't get a condom. He's so sexy and strong and the way he looks at me makes me melt. There's so much passion in his movement and the sounds he makes. Knowing how much he enjoys this makes it that much better.

   He gently moves my body off of him and places me down, getting on on top. When he's entering me again a minute later, this time he's keeping eye contact. He wants to be in control.

   "Maya, oh fuck..."

   I am already close to going over the edge and when his hand comes down to touch where our bodies meet, it set me off.

   "Marcus..." I moan, "that's so good. I'm close."

   "Yeah baby, let go," he mumbles and I do, right then.

   It feels like I'm falling and then waves are crashing over me, drowning me. When I can breathe again, Marcus is grinning. He's still moving in and out but it's more controlled now. It's only a couple minutes later that's moving fast again, groaning and cursing. And then he's done, and only pulls out at the very last second

   I don't feel like going anywhere and I don't have to, so we stay there and watch a movie. And then when we crash, together, right there on the couch, naked and tangled together, I'm exhausted and fulfilled and... happy.

   I wake up early as the sun is shining in the huge windows and into my eyes. Everything from the night before comes back to me as I see Marcus, his large body half off the couch. I pull myself out from behind him and stand up, feeling way too exposed, then grab what clothes of mine that I can find around the room and go upstairs, to the bathroom.

   Staring at myself in the mirror, I'm taken back to the moment in the hotel bathroom, the first day I was back in Boothbay. George brought me to the hotel and paid for those few nights that I stayed there. It was almost two months ago and yet feels like a life time ago now. I looked at my naked body that day and saw bruises. I saw pain and sadness. Today I see hope, and happiness. I'm not that girl anymore.

   I start the shower and get in, but it's only a few minutes before I hear some noise outside the door.

   "Mind if I join you?" Marcus says smoothly, pulling back the curtain a little.

   "I thought you'd sleep through me taking a shower," I tell him and smile.

   "I'm actually a light sleeper," he says and steps in, even though I didn't actually agree. Of course I am okay with him joining me in his own shower.

   Looking at him now, I feel intensely appreciative of him. Of just knowing him. He helped me get my apartment. He let me stay at his house for a week before I could move in. And, well, he does crazy things to me. He's brought back a feeling in me, of being wanted. And I think he'd say the same about me.

   So why can't I commit? This gorgeous guy likes me, wants me in a way that I so badly craved in the past, and yet I'm holding back.

   His hands are on me right away and I don't argue - I press myself against him and kiss him hard. I want to feel something more. If this was more than sex, somehow I know that Marcus would be good to me. But it's me I'm worried about. He deserves someone who can give him all of that back. But for now, I'll take what he's offering.

"You work today?" he asks me, as we are drying off from the shower.

   I'm distracted by his chiseled chest and the water dripping down his shoulders. "Uh, yeah. At 4P.M."

   "Right. I actually have to be in the office by 9A.M. Okay if I drop you off at home on my way?" he goes on.

   I pull on my jeans, but since I didn't find my underwear, it's awkward. I have my bra but I disregard it and pull my tank top on without it.

   "Of course. Thanks," I answer, turning away from him.

   He's acting pretty chill about us, today. I'm surprised, actually, as we go downstairs and get some coffee and then head out the door. He said he's cool with casual, because he still gets to be with me. That's what I want, isn't it? We just had sex twice in less than twelve hours.

   It's quarter to nine when he pulls into my apartment building lot. I turn towards him and lean in as he kisses me, his hands pulling me closer. There's always this heat between us, and it's crazy that it just turns on like a light switch. I feel it when he kisses me now.

   "Have a good day," I whisper to him, then pull away and put my hand on the door.

   "I will. I'll be thinking about you... in the shower." He grins as I push the door open and get out.

   I spend the day lounging on the couch, reading a romance book I've been wanting to finish, and eating whatever random food I can find in my fridge. That was a crazy weekend I need this time to unwind before I go to work for the evening.

   Nella calls a bit after 2P.M. and says she's on her way home from work. Kayleigh was hanging out with Willow today because I didn't answer when she called the night before, asking if I wanted to babysit today. Oops. I was busy with Marcus.

   "You need a ride to work?" Nella asks, and I feel bad even asking because I sort of bailed on her for today.

   "I can take the bus," I answer, dropping my book on the couch beside me.

   "It's raining. No point in you taking the bus. I can drive you," she says and I know she's serious, but I still feel bad.

   "I'm sorry I didn't answer your call last night," I say, even though it doesn't matter now. "Is Willow feeling better?"

   "She slept good last night, and no fever today. Kayleigh was more than happy to come over to hang out with her." It sounds like she's not mad about it, but I don't know how to be sure. 

   "Oh. That's good." I swallow hard.

   "So you went home with Marcus?" There is it.

   "Yeah." No point in denying it. George knew I went with Marcus, when we left Kayleigh's.

   "You stayed over?" she wants to know.

   "Yes. Stop interrogating me."

   She laughs. "The sex is good, right? Man, it has to be."

   I almost drop my phone. "Nella!"

   "Sorry," she says, but she's still laughing. "You are having casual sex. You shouldn't be embarrassed to talk about it."

   "I'm not," I say quickly.

   "I'm happy for you, geez. Okay, I'll be there at 3:30P.M. Willow misses you, so we'll take you to work," Nella finishes, as if she wasn't just asking me about the sex with Marcus.

"Okay. Thanks," I say, shaking my head.

What a weird conversation to have with my sister.