What if they all lived?

Chapter 17

First year - we are all mad before holidays

Sunday, 1st December 1971

Marlene Mckinnon

Marlene went up the stairs and into the boys dorm and found the boy she'd been looking for, "James" she said, laying down on his bed, as she did when they were little and had sleepovers. 

The boy was looking at the wall in front of him "What are you doing? Have the Marauders gotten bored of you already?" she said half joking half not he raised his shoulders, let out a small laugh and turned to his side "I am bored" he simply stated, the girl nodded "Yeah, me too" now it was her looking at the wall and Potter looking at her, playing with her sleeve "I think my dad is working way too much" she didn't know what to say, she was usually telling him that, she used to say it to Mrs and Mr Potter as well. She said "Euphemia, your husband is working way too much" and pointed at the tired mad. "Well, he is a very important and very needed man" that made James laugh a little "James" "Yeah?"

"Can I tell you a secret?" The boy got up, straightened his back immediately and was now leaning against the bed frame. She laughed at the movement that was a clear yes. He made an exasperated movement for her to keep talking.

"I heard a rumor, about me" he raised his eyebrows

"Yeah so, do you know a kid named Carl Winter? From Ravenclaw?" a nod

"Well rumor has it he likes me" 

"Well, that's good, he better, you are a very likable girl" she gave a weak laugh "Do you like him back?"

"We haven't even talked, once. No. I don't like him. The thing is, he's not the only one. Mary keeps trying to get me to give them a chance. Turns out five other boys like me as well. And it's just that Mary keeps talking to boys like it's so easy, And I just don't wanna."

He took that into consideration, stopping to analyze the girl's words. Marlene could practically see the wheels in his brain spinning 

"Well, you dont hate to date anyone you don't want to, I hope you know that" he nodded at her nod "No, yeah, I know that. But it's just weird, I guess. Why don't I like them back? It's not like they're all bad people. Mary is always talking about some guy that waved at her in class."

"Don't worry, you are way too young to worry about that. Way too young for that to be a pressing matter of any kind. Plus, we have pranks to pull" she laughed. It was true. She wouldn't worry. "I was thinking we could make quills explode when you try to use them. Maybe I'll get Sirius to help. '' The subject quickly became quite an interest of hers and she was now extremely excited to pull that one out.

Sirius Black

Sirius hated Christmas. He knew Regulus enjoyed the attention being lifted off of him but it wasn't the same for the twins.

He had always hated it, ever since he could remember.

 Christmas for the Blacks meant family dinners and boring galas and far too many of Sirius's relatives hanging about in their dress robes. He enjoyed talking shit about this time of the year with Thena. They would talk about the pain in the arse that it was to get dressed and walk in line and sit straight and dance and talk french with hsi relatives. And they would talk of their family. They loved talking shit about them in front of them. It was risky but that's why it was better than their usual talk.

His mother was always on edge, ready to snap at a moment's notice under the stress of playing the perfect hostess. His father grew somber and strict, always watching them with a reproachful eye to ensure they did nothing to embarrass him. It was altogether joyless-even the presents were boring, books about family history or dusty heirlooms that served no purpose past decoration.

So as November drew to a close, and December edged brittle and biting into Hogwarts, Sirius grew more and more sullen. While other students chatted about holiday parties and presents and family visits, he scowled and threw himself into his research, spending hours in the library. Even James was becoming insufferable-he kept talking about his mother's mince pies, or how badly he hoped it would snow.

"Last year my dad apparated us to this huge hill just outside of London-Inside-alonged, it felt SO weird—it was unbelievable how fast—"

Sirius slammed his book shut. They were sitting in the common room, next to the roaring fireplace. Remus and Peter were playing a game of gobstones on the floor.

"Do you mind?" Sirius snapped, "I'm trying to read." James fell silent, and both Peter and Remus glanced up when they heard the book slam (a thick tome on ocular transfiguration). Now, they watched him in tense silence.

"Er...sorry, mate," James said, awkwardly. Remus's lips were pursed, like he thought Sirius was being ridiculous, and Peter was looking back down at his gobstones nervously. Sirius knew he wasn't being fair, but he couldn't help responding to the sharp prick of irritation he felt at the excitement in James's voice. They would be boarding the train the following morning, and his own nerves were stretched thin.

"It's fine," he muttered, "Too loud to concentrate down here anyway." He picked up his book and retreated to their room, hoping to make a dignified exit. He was already embarrassed about snapping at James—he got frustrated with Peter all the time, and even Remus, but never James. It felt strange.

Of course, James Potter was too good to hold it against him. That night, when Sirius tiptoed over to his bed, the other boy let him in immediately. Sirius didn't even have time to speak before James was apologizing,

"Look, Sirius, I'm sorry about earlier—I wasn't thinking, I know that Christmas is rough for you—"

"No!" Sirius gaped, horrified with himself, "No, I should be the one apologizing! It's not your fault my family's awful. You have every right to be excited—I'll try to be less of a miserable git."

They were both smiling, all forgiven, and Sirius felt an incredible sense of relief. What would he do without James Potter?