Breathe

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"Let me know when it's time to come back, maybe when your life is on track."

- Bucky -

Taking that day off made it harder for me to see her again. Hard for me to see if she's freaking out, or if she isn't doing well. I couldn't bear to see it.

But I love her.

So I walked in the room to see boxes and boxes of pop tarts stacked in all corners of the room, hearing groaning from the floor. I looked down to see Thor groaning as he held his stomach, while Tessa was laughing from her bed.

"You gave up so fast!" She exclaimed, throwing a wrapper at him, "you can't get to pop tart number 50?"

"Lady Tessa, I'm done with pop tarts for the rest of my life thanks to you," he groaned, and I just started laughing.

"Bucky!" Tessa exclaimed, "long time no see! Thor and I were just trying all of the pop tarts society has ever made! You should try one!"

"Sorry darling but I ate before I came," I chuckled, sitting on the edge of her bed, "Thor.. You can go home."

"THANK YOU!" He exclaimed, hopping from the floor and stumbling out, "saved me from the pop tart monster."

"It's an addiction that needed to be stopped I'm sorry!"  She exclaimed back, giggling as he shut the door behind him. Her eyes glanced over to me, "I remember his obsession," she giggled as she shook her head, "And I remember eating his last pop tart. It was..." and she paused, "it was because he ate the last slice of my cake. I don't even like pop tarts!"

I was speechless.

Even though she might not think it's much, that memory means everything. EVERYTHING, to me. It means she's figuring out how to regain her memories. That her brain is tricking her into remembering what is seemed to be an alien to her mind.

"Are you okay Buckybear?" She asked as her palm cupped my cheek. Her beautiful hazel eyes searching mine as she gazed up at me.

"I'm just fine doll," I whispered, my eyes filling with tears seeing her starting to remember herself, "I'm so happy."

I'm so glad she missed the part where I called her doll. I fucked up with that.

"Why are you crying?" She asked, rubbing her thumb lightly across my cheek.

"I'm just really happy you remember," I smiled, rustling her hair a bit, "do you want me to braid this mop?"

She raised a brow, "nice change of subject. But yes please."

She maneuvered her way to where she was sitting in between my legs, handing me her brush and closing her eyes as I started to gently brush through her hair. My hands started to weave her hair into two different French braids as she started trying to talk to me.

"Can you continue the story?" She asked sleepily, "I've never fallen asleep with someone braiding my hair."

"I'll always continue the story darlin," I smiled, and she turned to look up at me.

"Can you tell me how Jay helped Theresa when she was scared?" She asked, and my heart ached to just hug her, and tell her everything is going to be okay. But I can't.

Because she doesn't know who I am in relation to her.

"Of course," I smiled, and she gave me a small smile.

- Tessa -

October 18, 2018

Today was a very hard day for me. Why? Because some people just don't know when to quit. Sam was being a bitch today.

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