lethal | hs

/32/

~~*~~
Molly Pierce

I've been staring at this locket for over half an hour, yet the temptation to open it keeps getting stronger.

I promised him I wouldn't, though. I literally opened my mouth and swore that I wouldn't open the locket. I'd feel too guilty, but curiosity is killing me.

I mean, does he have some sort of way to know if I open it or not?

With him, the possibilities are almost endless. I have no idea what he put inside of here. Usually lockets have tiny pictures inside of them, but we don't have any photos together, so that option is ruled out. It could be a picture of other things, maybe. Or another assumption of mine is that he put nothing in it. He'll get me so caught up on what's inside this necklace, just for me to open it and there will be nothing inside.

I can hear his laugh now. He'd probably think he's hilarious for doing that.

Maybe that's what I need to do; convince myself there's nothing inside.

That way, if there really isn't anything inside of the locket, I won't get my hopes up. Plus, it'll make me less interested in trying to open it. That way I win either way. My hopes won't get too high and his trust in me won't be broken.

I stare down at the necklace laying on my vanity's desk. Its oval shaped, perfect silver feels as though it's haunting me. The shine of the necklace maintains the majority of its beauty, but at the same time it feels so beckoning. I don't know where or how he got the stuff to make such a gorgeous piece but he did it successfully. Its edges are smooth, it doesn't feel cheap, and the suspense he's created makes me more obsessed with it.

I reach my hand down, rubbing my thumb along the five letters that spell my name. It's probably the neatest cursive I've seen freehanded on a piece of jewelry. If I never knew that he made this himself, then I would be convinced that some kind of machine was used to carve out the design. His cursive handwriting is perfect.

Maybe just one peek inside won't kill me. My hand travels over to the piece that clasps both sides of the locket together, but I hesitantly snatch them away.

I can't. I'd feel horrible.

Again, I just have to make myself think there's nothing inside.

Quickly I snatch the necklace up, clipping it back behind my neck before I decide to get too impulsive. My eyes zero in on my reflection in the vanity's lighting as I make the final adjustments to the necklace on my collarbone. The locket fits so well with the diamonds. He really did ensure that they matched so that I could wear both of them at once.

I look back down, peering at the piles of jewelry littering my desk. I have so much, but the only pieces I enjoy wearing are ones made by him.

God, what's happening to me? This is so wrong. I can't be with him, whether it's romantically or sexually. I shouldn't be enjoying the moments I have with him as much as I do. If anyone ever found out, I'd get killed. Landon would either tell everyone to humiliate me or tell nobody to blackmail me. Niall would be so hurt. He'd think I'm using him. And my parents, they'd be ashamed of me.

But I hate it because everyone who doesn't like H really just hasn't gotten to know him at all. I mean, I like to think I know more than others, but practically everyone thinks he's a whore with a bad attitude. His intentions when he sleeps with a girl aren't to go off and brag about it or play her, he just wants to feel validated by someone. When it comes to that, he's not a bad guy, he's just hurting.

I just wish my mind would stop clouding itself with thoughts of him.

All I know is that I can't open this locket.