Love Her

Page 1

I think I was alright. At least, that's what I told myself.

Of course, I couldn't fool myself completely. When I stopped to take stock of my life, which I tried not to do too often, I couldn't ignore the significance of my strange behaviors. I felt like a crumpled-up sheet of paper, perfectly blank and covered in creases.

My face felt permanently set into the fixed mask it had worn all night. I wasn't sure I had the ability to smile anymore. I held my head in my hands.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked.

"Nothing much." I sighed, looking up. "Why do you ask?"

She was patting her hair in a nervous gesture. Her pupils dilated in concern. "It's just that, I know how you're unhappy a lot. And, maybe it doesn't help anything, but I wanted you to know that I'm always here. I won't ever let you down, I promise that you can always count on me. But you know that, right? That I would never, ever abandon you?"

"Yeah, I know. I appreciate you."

The smile broke across her face the way the sunrise set the clouds on fire, and the shadows didn't seem as dark as usual. Not with my personal sun around. Her shiny bronze-colored hair fell in ringlets past her shoulders. Her chocolate brown eyes examined me with an interest that was not at all childlike; it was adult, aware, and intelligent. She always knew exactly what to say to calm my nerves and bring me back to earth. She was a serious person, a responsible person.

I was an empty shell. Like a vacant house condemned for months, I'd been utterly uninhabitable. Now I was a little improved. The front room was in better repair. But it was all just the one small piece.

"I'll see you in a bit." She said.

"I thought you said you wouldn't abandon me?" I poked.

"You won't be alone." She stated.

I looked at her curiously, then looked up to see my current boyfriend walking across the lawn a little ways off.

I gave her a pleading look, to which she replied "It'll be fine. I'll call you."

She then got up.

I became nervous. She didn't know what I was planning.

The sun was beginning to dissipate below the horizon, the sky a brilliant color of pink and orange.

I started to breathe a bit faster, getting edgy.

I grimaced. I didn't want to do this.

Not just not now, but not ever.