Evolution of a lover's heart | jjk

32

"We don't have to go inside; we can go back."

"So we're never going on an actual date because I'm scared to enter the building?"

"Well, yeah? If it makes you uncomfortable, I'd rather order pizza from the couch."

"How long?"

You check your phone. "Well, we booked for six, so ten minutes."

Jeongguk stares at the glass doors with empty eyes. "I just... can't stop thinking about the last time. I feel so stupid, waiting for you when I've already fucked it up. I fucked you to win a bet, and then I ghosted you. How am I supposed to act like that never happened?"

People are walking past you, talking and laughing as they head up the three small steps to enter the restaurant.

"Because that's not what actually happened," you tilt your head to look up at him, letting go of his bicep to hold his warm hand instead. You admire his profile, the rounded tip of his nose and the bridge of it, his dark and relatively straight eyelashes.

He's a vision in black tonight; black slacks, black button-up tucked into them, and one of his black leather jackets on top. As the finishing touch, his black hair is combed back. It's styled more than usual, but you know it rarely stays styled for long, always ending up falling forward sooner or later.

"I wanna be here. With you," you admit quietly, but Jeongguk remains silent, staring at the doors.

"Look, if given the chance, we would've both done things differently back then, but it's a different time and place now, and I'm so glad that I get to be here with you." You squeeze his hand and look straight ahead at the obstacle in the form of those glass doors.

"It's just a place that serves food. Cheap tables and sweaty menus. And the other customers, maybe some are celebrating a birthday or a promotion, or just stopping by since this place has good gluten-free options that don't taste like a rat's ass."

He doesn't laugh, but you're at least rewarded with his eyes on you. You pull him with you by his hand, closer to the steps, and with you taking two of them in one stride, you're about the same height.

Another couple walks by, and you wait until they're gone before you wrap your arms around Jeongguk's neck. He watches you, big eyes still hesitant, but his hands find your waist at least.

"What if I'm a disappointment, though? What do I do then?"

Your smile fades as you see the genuine feelings of worry and fear that brew inside of him.

"Jeongguk, you're not a disappointment. I know you," you encourage, using your index finger to brush the night's first stray piece of hair away from his face. "First and foremost—even before dates and romantic feelings and all that—you're one of my best friends. But if it's too hard, we can go home. I'm happy doing whatever, as long as it's with you."

It's quiet as you wait for his reply. Nervously, he nips on his bottom lip as he considers.

"I don't wanna go home. You must think I'm ridiculous, but I'm just... scared. I've never, uh, been good at dates, and it's never ended very well when I've tried."

"Then don't try."

"What?"

You grin at the surprised and confused wrinkles on his forehead and between his eyebrows. "Let me ask you out, and I can be the nervous one."

"No, it d—"

"Jeon Jeongguk, would you go on a date with me? Today? Like... in five minutes or so?"

"Take that back," he huffs, " I'm the one who's supposed to ask you out."