Sincere sat at the table with Messiah beside her picking at the food on her plate. She used her fork pushing the lunch which consisted of honey sesame chicken bites with a side of Chinese noddles on her plate; as Messiah watched.
"You not hungry? ," Messiah stared at her.
"I just don't have a appetite right now. ," she dropped the fork from her finger tips.
"Sin you ain't ate nothing and it's going on one o'clock. I need you to eat even if you just take three bites. ," said Messiah.
She picked the fork back up picking at her food. Keeping her eyes on the plate in front of her tears rolled down her face dropping onto the plate. The emotions that she was feeling came out of nowhere and being that Sincere hardly ever cried she didn't know why she was feeling the way she does. Messiah lifted her chin making her look at him.
"Why you crying? What's wrong? ," Messiah used the pad of his thumb wiping her face.
"Because.. ," sniffled Sincere hiccuping in the process.
"Because what? Calm down I'm right here. ," assured Messiah.
"I know I need to eat but I don't have the appetite to. I don't know what's wrong with me I'm always crying and usually I don't even cry. I wanna stop crying, but everything has been overwhelming for me. I don't know what to do. ," sobbed Sincere. She felt like everything was becoming too much and she thought she would be fine instead of letting anyone help her.
Messiah scooped her from the chair placing her onto his lap rubbing her back. He felt wetness on his neck as she continued to cry. Lifting her face in his hands he kissed her forehead, nose, lips; then all over her face looking into her eyes.
"I know you going through a lot and I'm sorry for being responsible for it as much as you say it ain't my fault it is. I was in the streets.. I'm the reason for all you when through without me, I'm the reason we got shot, I'm the reason niggas still after us and I'm gone handle it. I was selfish for leaving you for two years. ," admitted Messiah. He knew majority of this was his doing and he was willing to do whatever it takes to fix it.
"I understood why you did it and I forgave you. ," sniffled Sincere.
"That don't matter it was selfish of me to do and I'll apologize for it every time. I don't deserve you Sincere, but I love you with every breath in my body. I'll kill for you; I'll die for you, you know that? ," Messiah kissed her forehead.
"Yes I know. ," replied Sincere.
"I'll make anybody disappear for I let something happen to you again. To Kairi and Kareem; to my family. I'll die or die trying as long as I know y'all gone be straight. I'm gone handle it I promise. ," assure Messiah resting his forehead against hers.
"I hate when you talk about you dying it makes me think back to them two years without you. ," frowned Sincere.
"But we know how this shit go you eat or get ate. ," stated Messiah.
"If they take you they might as well take me too. We go together remember. ," said Sincere.
"Sinc—
"That's our word Messiah we promised that to each other. Promise me now if shit goes off the deep in we'll always have each other until the very end. ," Sincere held her pinky out.
".... I promise it's us until the end. ," he interlocked his pinky with hers as they kissed them simultaneously.
"I love you. ," Sincere rubbed the side of his face.
"I love you too mamas. ," he kissed her hand.
_____________
Sincere stepped inside of the two story building taking a look around at everything around her. She walked up to the front desk catching the attention of the receptionist.
"Good evening I'm Indigo who are you here to see? ," asked the receptionist typing on her computer.
"I'm here to see Dr. Robinson my name's Sincere.. Sincere Brewster. ," spoke Sincere.
"Okay she's expecting you the fourth door on the left I'll let her know you're on your way. ," nodded Indigo.
"Okay thanks. ," Sincere followed the directions the receptionist gave here knocking on the door before entering.
"Hi you can have a seat on the couch or anywhere you're comfortable. I'm Dr. Valeri Robinson and today were going to talk about whatever you're comfortable with sharing and I'll ask you some questions if you don't want to answer that's fine too. What would you like to be addressed as Sincere or Mrs. Brewster? ," Dr. Robinson introduced herself and trying to get to know her patient.
"You can just call me Sincere. ," said Sincere.
"Okay Sincere tell me about yourself. ," Dr. Robinson gave her undivided attention to Sincere who sat across from her.
"I'm originally from Brooklyn New York. Before I moved here I was a full time nurse. I'm a mother and a wife that's about it. ," stated Sincere.
"You stated that you were a full time nurse before you came to Georgia what changed? ," questioned Dr. Robinson.
"My husband was incarcerated my family and friends we all moved in different directions. The closest person to watch my son is his grandparents. my husband's parents. They kept him while I worked because I'm not too trusting of people with my son. ," explained Sincere picking at her nails nervously.
"And what caused you to not be too trusting of people? ," Dr. Robinson wrote waiting on an answer from her patient.
"Can we go to the next question? ," Sincere rubbed her palms on her jeans.
"How would you describe your childhood? ," asked Dr. Robinson sensing her mood shift.
"My childhood was pretty average to me my sisters and I didn't have to want for anything. We weren't rich but we came from money. ," shrugged Sincere her childhood was nothing spectacular it was normal to her.
"Are both your parents in your life? Together still? How's your relationship with them? ," asked Dr. Robinson.
"Yes my parents are in my life and still together. My relationship with my mom is loving and jovial I could always go to her whenever I need her. She's my best friend always have been; always in my corner to let my know everything would be fine. ," spoke Sincere.
"And your father? ," Dr. Robinson looked over her glasses glancing at Sincere.
"My dad and I didn't have a stable relationship until I was around seventeen. He was there but he wasn't y'know? He was always out in the streets. It's certain things I wish that I wish he was there for and things we could've bonded together over. My mom was both parents to me for a while. ," explained Sincere crossing her legs over one another.
"What about your sisters? What's your relationship like with your siblings? ," asked Dr. Robinson
"My sisters and I relationship is great, but it hasn't always been that way with my sister Sienna. We would always fight well she'll always find something to start an argument with me I was her target until I moved out which was a day before my nineteenth birthday. My other sister Serenity and I have always had a tight bond no matter what. ," Sincere smiled small thinking about Serenity always having her back through any situation she faced.
"It looks like our time's up it's a pleasure meeting with you Sincere. I'll schedule your appointment in two weeks and I'll email you an exact day. ," Dr. Robinson stopped the ringing timer closing her notebook.
"Okay have a good day. ," said Sincere standing to her feet she placed her shades over her eyes heading towards the door.
"You too. ," replied Dr. Robinson.
