The next day Rupanshi and Bindu were waiting for their turn. As the patient came out, Shehnaaz went inside. The nurse called Rupanshi and her mother inside.
They went inside but Rupanshi felt uncomfortable with Shehnaaz's presence. She was looking at her continuously while Shehnaaz was unaware of a constant gaze on her.
"Sidharth mere koi mail nahi aaya hai. Resend karo." Shehnaaz said.
"What? Aisa kaise ho sakta hai maine toh kal hi send kar dia tha. Ab tum hi resend kar lo apne mail pe ya mere laptop par hi kaam kar lo." He replied and looked at Rupanshi who cleared her throat to make him aware of her presence.
"Sorry Bindu Ji and Rupanshi for waiting. Toh aap batao Rupanshi you want to talk in your mother's presence or alone." He asked.
Rupanshi was hesitant. She did not want to talk in her mother's presence. Not because she wanted to hide anything from her. It was just that she didn't wanted to stress her mother more. But she felt that not agreeing to talk in her presence would hurt her mother.
Seeing her in a dilemma, Sidharth gestured Bindu to wait outside. Bindu left the cabin. He then asked, " Now first tell me how are you? And then tell me whatever is there in your mind."
Rupanshi kept looking at Shehnaaz with a frown. Sidharth saw this and spoke, "Rupanshi she is my P.A. She knows everything about this hospital. You don't need to feel uncomfortable with her presence."
"Par aapne toh kaha tha ki meri baat sirf aap tak hi rahegi." She reminded him.
Shehnaaz who was busy with her work looked at the direction from where she heard her name.
"Of course yaad hai mujhe. But yaha pe sabhi cases sab doctors study aur discuss karte hai. Aur jinhe apna case sirf mere tak rakhna hota hai like you vo koi aur doctor tak nahi jaata. But she is my P.A. inhe sab pata hai. She maintains my files, cabin, meetings, conferences etc. So relax." He assured her but she wasn't convinced. She was fidgeting hands in her lap.
Shehnaaz interrupted, "It's fine Sidharth. She isn't comfortable. Mein apne cabin mai jaakar kaam kar lun gi." She then left his cabin.
"Ab bolo kya chal raha hai aapke andar. Jo share karna chahti ho. Jitna karna chahti ho karo." He said.
"Dr. vo problem yeh hai ki mein...nahi mera matlab mera colour." She spoke hesitating.
"What is the problem?" He questioned.
"Mera colour hi problem hai Dr. Mein saanwali hun." She spoke with difficulty as a lump formed in her throat.
"Do you think it is a problem?" He questioned again.
"Hein problem toh hai. Tabhi toh sab mujhe mere rang par kuch na kuch kehte rehte hai. Par mein kya karun? Jo bass mai tha creams and soaps sab try kara kuch farak nahi padta." She replied letting her tears flow down.
"Rupanshi let me reframe my question. Do you think your colour is the problem? What I mean is kyabaapko aisa lagta hai ki aapka colour aapke liye problem hai. Mein dusre kya sochte hai aur kya bolte hai vo nahi puch raha hun. Aapki raai jaan na chahta hun. Aap time lijiye apna aur phir batayiyega." He explained.
Rupanshi was puzzled. It seemed a difficult question to her as it was the first time that someone asked her about this. Otherwise it has always been people commenting, making fun and suggesting remedies to lighten skin colour. Looking at her expressions, he asked her to relax and called Bindu inside. Bindu came and bombarded him with questions asking if he could figure out her daughter's problem, what needs to be done next?, are medicines required in her treatment? etc.
Sidharth said, "Bindu Ji mein aapki chinta samajhta hun. Aap maa hai inki aur aapko fikar hai. Par aise ek din mai aapki beti se sab bulwana bohat badi baat hai. Aur rahi baat ki mujhe inki problem pata chali ya nahi toh maine inhe Homework dia hai. Vo Homework ko evaluate karne ke baad aapse baat karunga iss baare mai."
He looked at Rupanshi and asked, "Aapko koi aur dikkat mehsus hoti hai. Jaise neend nahi aana, chamak neend aana, bhukh bohat lagna ya lagna hi nahi?"
"Nahi aisa kuch khaas nahi hai." She replied.
"Fine then. Next appointment aap reception par likhwa dijiye apne hisab se par next time pehle Homework complete hona chahiye. And haan no cheating, answer khudka hona chahiye dusre logo ka nahi." He said making Rupanshi smile. Bindu was happy seeing her daughter smile genuinely after so long. They both left.
☆
"Sidharth I have made a few slides of the PPT. Ek baar check kar ke bata do if you want any changes or should I continue?" Shehnaaz asked.
She found him lost somewhere. She repeated her query. Still he didn't responded. She shook his hand and he came out of the trance.
"Are you okay? Tabiyat theek hai aapki?" She inquired.
"Shehnaaz, what do you want? Yeh kya hai kabhi you act so cold and kabhi you are so concerned." He asked frustrated from her behaviour.
"Sidharth please. Let's not talk about this. I am asking you something related to work." She said looking everywhere but him.
"Fine then. Let it be like this. Atleast I will not be concerned ki maine kuch galat kia hai jiski wajah se you are acting cold and distant." He stated firmly.
He checked the PPT and asked her to make some changes. Then he engaged himself in some file ignoring her. Shehnaaz didn't like this and her eyes teared up. She left the cabin to hide her tears from him.
☆
"Why I felt bad jab unhone aise baat ki mujhse? He also agreed to stay indifferent with me. Maan gaye vo meri baat. Manaya bhi nahi mujhe. Par mein ro kyu rahi hun yahi toh mein chahti thi na. Aur aise hi toh reh rahi hun na itne saalo se toh ab kyu farak pad raha hai." She complained to her reflection in the mirror of her cabin's washroom and was sobbing like a baby. She kept wiping her tears while speaking but they kept flowing.
This has been her habit since she was 14 years old. She used to cry and talk to herself standing in front of the mirror.
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NOTE : - Namaste everyone. This time I am early with an update. This chapter had less interaction of the main characters. But I felt this issue of skin colour must be taken. Hope I didn't disappoint y'all with this.
What will be your answer to the H.W. given by Sidharth to Rupanshi?
Have you ever simultaneously cried and talked to yourself in front of the mirror?
(P.S. I have done this many times. I feel light after this. And no one judges you for crying as there is no one to judge.😅)
{Published on : Wednesday, 4 May 2022}
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Keep Sidharth and his family in your prayers.
Your writer,
Sudhanya.
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Dil Ko Karaar Aaya (SidNaaz❤)
FanfictionSidharth Shukla, a clinical psychologist, was once a fun-loving and jovial kind of person but now is very serious towards his work as he lost a very important PERSON in his life. Shehnaaz Kaur Gill, P.A. of Sidharth Shukla, is a very reserved perso...
