Weasley

Chapter 10

Alliums last class was DADA, she wasn't sure how Lockhart would he as a teacher. He could be obnoxious but would that make him a bad teacher? There was also the part of her that doubted that his books were fiction, some were quite far fetched but this is the wizarding world.

She followed the rest of Slytherin house to the DADA classroom. Draco and Blaise were discussing quidditch which she gave occasionally commentary on. She felt content in that moment, life was simple for a moment.

Well everything was simple until she got into the classroom.

Everywhere she looked there was a photo of Gilderoy Lockhart in view, she wasn't sure if it was more creepy or sad.

She was able to get a seat by Blaise since Pansy had claimed the one next to Draco. She was relived when she set all of Lockharts books down, she had casted a lightening charm but it had clearly faded away.

Once the whole class was seated, Lockhart cleared his throat loudly and it was at that moment Allium thought of a nickname for him. Giggleroy Lockhart, it was pure genius.

Giggleroy reached forward and picked up a random students copy of Travels with Trolls, and held it up to show his own, winking portrait on the front.

"Me," he said, pointing at it and winking as well. "Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League, and five time winner of Witch Weekly's MostCharming Smile Award—but I don't talk about that. I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at her!"

He waited for them to laugh; a few people smiled weakly. Allium wanted to burst out laughing, not from the joke but, from how someone can be so full of themselves

"I see you've all bought a complete set of my books—well done. I thought we'd start today with a little quiz. Nothing to worry about—just to check how well you've read them, how much you've taken in—"

When he had handed out the test papers he returned to the front of the class and said, "You have thirty minutes—start—now!" Allium looked down at her paper after only the first question she wanted to bash her head in.

1. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite color?

2. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?

3. What, in your opinion, is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?

On and on it went, over three sides of paper, right down to:

54. When is Gilderoy Lockhart's birthday, and what would his ideal gift be?

Half an hour later and a lot of headache later, Lockhart collected the papers and rifled through them in front of the class.

"Tut, tut—hardly any of you remembered that my favorite color is lilac. I say so in Year with the Yeti. And a few of you need to read Wanderings with Werewolves more carefully—not a single person knew my favourite broom—I clearly state in Chapter twelve that my ideal birthday gift would be harmony between all magic and non magic peoples—I must say you lot are worse than my other class and that's saying something"

Now this made him the bottom of many students list, because being worse than other classes, meant being worse than Gryffindor.

Allium was sure she wouldn't last the rest of the class especially till the end of the year.

"Now onto the fun stuff, let's see if this class can redeem itself" Giggleroy said as he lifted up a large cage placing it on his desk.

"Now—be warned! It is my job to arm you against the foulest creatures known to wizardkind! You may find yourselves facing your worst fears in this room. Know only that no harm can befall you whilst I am here. All I ask is that you remain calm."

Allium was sure that it would be something dumb, Giggleroy looks like he'd be scared by a common mouse. "Imagine if it's a muggle child's toy and he simply got confused" Allium whispered to Blaise who snickered. "Or a niffler, he's probably terrified they'll take his hair" Blaise responsed nearly making Allium laugh out loud.

"I must ask you not to scream," said Lockhart in a low voice. "It might provoke them." As the whole class held its breath (and as Allium and Blaise chuckled about things it could possibly be), Lockhart whipped off the cover.

"Yes," he said dramatically. "Freshly caught Cornish pixies."

That was the straw that broke the camels back for Blaise and Allium. They both laughed louder than an offended hippogrif.

"Yes?" He smiled at Them .

"Well, they're not—they're not very—dangerous, are they?" Blaise choked.

"Don't be so sure!" said Lockhart, waggling a finger annoyingly at Blaise. "Devilish tricky little blighters they can be!"

The pixies were electric blue and about eight inches high, with pointed faces and voices so shrill it was like listening to a lot of budgies arguing. The moment the cover had been removed, they had started jabbering and rocketing around, rattling the bars and making bizarre faces at the people nearest them.

"Right, then," Lockhart said loudly. "Let's see what you make of them!" And he opened the cage.

It was pandemonium. The pixies shot in every direction like rockets. Several shot straight through the window, showering the back row with broken glass. The rest proceeded to wreck the classroom more effectively than a rampaging rhino. They grabbed ink bottles and sprayed the class with them, shredded books and papers, tore pictures from the walls, up ended the waste basket, grabbed bags and books and threw them out of the smashed window; within minutes, half the class was sheltering under desks. Allium tried to grab one but only got her finger bit, she wasn't sure of any spells that would be useful.

"Come on now—round them up, round them up, they're only pixies," Lockhart shouted.

He rolled up his sleeves, brandished his wand, and bellowed, "Peskipiksi Pesternomi!"

It had absolutely no effect; one of the pixies seized his wand and threw it out of the window, too. Lockhart gulped and dived under his own desk, it took every nerve in Allium not to scream at him.

The bell rang and there was a mad rush toward the exit. In the relative calm that followed, Lockhart straightened up, caught sight of Blaise, Allium and Draco, who were almost at the door, and said, "Well, I'll ask you three to just nip the rest of them back into their cage." He swept past them and shut the door quickly behind him.

"Can you believe him?, my father will hear about this!" roared Draco as one of the remaining pixies bit him painfully on the ear.

"He's such a coward, why in Merlin would dumblewhore let him work here" said Hermione, Allium finally word out a spell for the pixies a simple freezing spell was so far effective.

Draco and Blaise followed her lead and helped freeze the pixies. After five or so minutes they had rounded up the pixies, Allium may have stuffed a frozen pixie down the back of Draco's robes but she'll never admit it.