Paper Dolls

Chapter 7

By the time our session is over, my quads are sore and sweat drips down my back profusely. Mr Lee made us do our dance routine twelve times. The first five times he paused the track every few seconds, making us perform the each step to near perfection.

I say near because the last verse will honestly be the death of me. Thankfully, the last time did the trick and I executed the move at the precise moment, earning a smile from Mr. Lee. 

Once we are done, everyone sits down in a large circle. The fifteen of us girls, the seven Viva members and Mr. Lee. 

Chan, being the lead dancer of Viva starts the discussion. I listen intently to his words of wisdom as he points out small minute postures and movements we could incorporate into the routine to make it stand out. 

He's smaller than Jiho but he stands out the most with his bright pink hair and light brown eyes. I concentrate on his words but ever so often I feel Jiho staring at me and it is enough to make my cheeks flush. 

I've never felt this conscious around a boy before. Granted, we've never actually interacted with Viva till now and I've only ever seen them on tv. But still why does he have to keep looking? It's making it so hard for me to concentrate. 

An invisible string pulls my gaze towards him for only a second and I see him turn to Chan, making me wonder if I am imagining things. 

Once Chan finishes, all of us smile gratefully and chant out the words thank you in unison. Our voices bounce off the walls, filling the room like an encore. It makes some of the boys smile and now it's my turn to stare at Jiho as he flashes that million dollar smile of his that made one of Viva's performances trend on YouTube. 

Dammit. I really need to stop. The last thing I need right now is a very handsome, six foot tall distraction. 

The boys offer some words of encouragement and all of us stand up once the session is over. I can already see a few younger trainees waiting outside, eager to get on with their dance practices for the day. 

They stare at Viva and then us and it's hard not to see the admiration on their faces even when they look at us girls. It reminds me of how I used to look at Dalia when she came to visit during her trainee years. 

She hadn't debuted yet then but she was already a hero to me. 

The boys of Viva leave first, followed by JinJin and her merry troop of followers. They march past the juniors with their heads held high, ignoring them completely. The remaining trainees stop to chat with some of their junior friends and Binna waits for me by the door as I pick up my satchel bag.

"Jina, I'd like a minute," Mr. Lee's voice freezes me in place and she stares at me in alarm. 

"I'll meet you at the lobby," I mouth to her and then head to the corner where a large black speaker sits. Mr. Lee stands next to it, a clipboard in hand and fingers tapping the top of the amplifier. 

"You were off your game today," Mr. Lee notes without looking up from the papers in his hands. 

"I promise to do better," I reply immediately and stand straight ready to receive more criticism. It certainly seems to be that kind of day for me. 

He looks up at me through thick red rimmed glasses and his eyes narrow. "Why were you crying?"

"I wasn't," I quickly say as panic burrows its way into the back of my neck. It feels like something digging into my skin, I have the strongest urge to scratch it. The last thing I want is for a teacher to report that I have caved under stress. 

Management wants idols who are immune to staggering amounts of criticism, insane working hours and the ability to smile pretty through it all. Trainees who can't take the heat get kicked out. Period.