𝐏𝐎𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐍 | 𝟏𝟖+

𝐗𝐗𝐗𝐈𝐗 | 𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐁𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓

"We tried a thousand times, he said, "let's try  thousand and one."

❦

   "Luka?" Gianna called out to her brother as she rounded the large bookshelves surrounding her. A smile graced her lips when she found her brother sitting on the large window seat with a book in his lap and his reading glasses perched on his perfect nose.
   Luka was always the brother she looked up to more whether she knew it or not. Peace radiated off of him and made anyone feel safe when they were around him. Although their father him weak for it, Luka took his mother's word when she told him that he was every bit of strength-not with violence or power like his brother and father. 
   Gianna ran up to her brother and sat across from him, snuggling her bent legs between his. His deep blue eyes met her brown ones through his obsidian hair. "What is it, Solnechnyy svet?"
   Sunshine, was the first thing Luka thought of when he first saw his baby sister in his mother's arms. Her golden hair, soft brown eyes, and even softer skin made her seem like an angel, and he wanted to be her guardian for as long as he could be. 
   "Where do we go after we die?" The question shocked Luka but he knew her curiosity had been growing as she's gotten older. He placed his book down and thought for a second, out of all the books he has read, all the myths he had heard about, and all of the religions he studied-there was telling the actual truth about where we go after death.
   "I think when we close our eyes and take out last breath, our minds get stuck in a dream of past, present, and future. We dream about an alternative to what we wished could've happened while not knowing what actually did happen. But there is no telling what happens after death, really."
   Gianna watched the way his brows creased and his lips puckered when he went deep into thought. She tried to mimic his expression as she leaned her cheek against his knee. "Well, do you know what I will dream about when I die?"
  "What?"
   "When I die and get lost in the fantasies in my head, I want to be surrounded by a thousand roses. I would walk through the gardens and eventually find everyone I love. Mamma, Papa, Leo, you, Axel, Lev, and Rowan. We would all be happy and free, dancing like souls in the sky," Gianna pondered. Luka hummed in response, leaning forward to place his forehead against hers.
  "Well, although dreams are the greatest fantasy we could ever live in, they are not reality. Death is sudden and unexpected, sometimes people can control when they leave, and sometimes, they can't. You are not dead yet, you have too many people to live for."
  "Of course, I'm not dead yet," Gianna chuckled, scrunching her small nose against his.
   "But you're close to it, very close, and if you don't wake up now, you will be leaving and hurting the people who matter most to you."
  "And who is that?"
   "Rowan, Sofia, oh and let's not forget the little beating heart that lives off of yours-"

❦

GIANNA STARKOV

   I jerk awake with a gasp.
   The pressure behind my eyes pound harder and harder as I take in the bright white ceiling and walls. A beeping noise goes off beside me, it's a monitor. When I try to lift my hand, I'm restrained by a weight on it, Sofia, she's cuddled up next to me with a light bruise on the side of her head with stitches. She slept soundly, looking very much like her father when she slept.
   Speaking of which, he sat in the chair next to the hospital bed we were in. He was in a hoodie and sweats, his head propped on his hand as he slept. I smiled when I caught both Sofia and Rowan's pouty lips, they quite literally looked the same when they slept.
   "Oh, good, you're awake, I'll be quiet so I don't wake them." I looked at the nurse who entered the room. He held a clipboard in hand and scanned what was on it. 
   "Can you tell me what happened?" My voice was raspy and dry, along with my throat which hurt a lot.
   "You were in an accident, your daughter had a minor concussion and got three stitches to her temple but overall, she is perfectly healthy. Now with you, you suffered a severe concussion that kept you in a small coma for three days, there was some bruising on your neck and chest area from the seat belt, and just some minor cuts we took care of. We also ran some tests which came back today-you and your baby are perfectly healthy and ready to go home tomorrow afternoon after we know you are completely fine."
   "Wait, did you say baby?" I ask in confusion.
   Maybe I was still asleep.
   Or maybe I heard him wrong.
   "Yes, you are almost three months pregnant, I advise that you go see an OBGYN for an ultrasound and normal checkups, especially after the accident and if you want the gender, we are only a phone call away-congratulations." The doctor left shortly after that. I was in pure shock, almost three months ago was when Rowan and I got married, I guess he lived up to his word.
   But then I remembered what Luka said in my dream. 
   "Rowan, Sofia, oh and let's not forget the little beating heart that lives off of yours-"
   The little beating heart was my baby-I'm pregnant; even after that horrible accident. 
   "Gianna," a raspy voice called out to me, when I turned my head, I met Rowan's worried gaze. He jerked up and kneeled beside my bed, holding my hand. "Fuck, I am so sorry, I should have stayed with you and Sofia, fuck." I hushed him and slipped from Sofia's weight, bringing his head to my chest, my fingers fiddled with his hair as he apologized over and over again.
   "It's okay, baby, just tell me what happened after the accident," I whispered.
   "Right, well, we were able to kill off most of Lorenzo's men when I got a call from Scarlet. She sounded like she was in pain and informed me about the accident, I got there immediately. Kaiden was thrown out of the car by impact, he practically shattered his shin bone in his left leg and is still in a coma, Scarlet was able to get out and get help, and Sofia woke up as soon I had her in my arms."
   His voice was shaken like he was reliving the moment all over again. The tremble in his hands is something I've never seen in him before, the fear that he almost lost his wife and daughter-and his unborn child. I'm sure he doesn't know yet; I don't know why the doctors wouldn't have just told him.
   "You were out for three days and everyone was quick to get back to work. Silas and the rest of his empire are pissed that their heir is in this condition and are out for blood, so things have been messier since the accident-fuck, I'm so sorry, little bird-"
   I don't know why I blurt it.
   Or even say it.
   Out of everything he has said, the fact that there is a baby inside of me has been the one thing on my mind.
   "I'm pregnant."
   The trembling in his hands stops and stiffens, my hands begin to tremble, and fear sinks to my stomach. Not because I think he won't want it, but because I'm pregnant while we are going through the deadliest time in our lives. The thought of having another baby was great at first, but now it's actually happening and I'm scared shitless.
   "W-why didn't the doctors tell me?"
   "I don't know."
   "Are you happy about it?"
   "Yes and no."
   "Do you want to keep it?" This time I finally look at him, the fear in his eyes isn't hard to catch. We both know the struggles of pregnancy and the struggles of this war, adding two and two together makes things complicated but fuck, does he really think I would not want this baby?
   "Of course, I want this baby, despite everything going on I'm going to have this baby no matter what," I reassured him. A sigh of relief escaped his lips, he leaned forward and kissed me slowly before pulling me apart to kiss my stomach. My lower lip trembles, tears threatening to spill as I look at my small family. "Rowan, I'm scared," my voice breaks. 
   He lifts up and sits next to me in the small bed, I plaster myself to his side as Sofia sighs in her sleep and cuddles against my back, her small hand lying flat against Rowan's stomach. "I'm scared too, and even though I can't promise anything, I'll die trying to protect our family-I'll make sure at some point we are able to live, and not just survive."
   "Your battle is my battle; we fight together and we protect together, I'll die before death gets a chance to even look at our children," I promised. 

❦

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