The Contradiction Between Humans

Chapter 35: Break

   Between the two tests I had only seven days of actual rest, this day included. Soon, the second semester will begin. This is the first time a vacation went this fast, the other "vacations" were something else disguised as such.

   "Haaah..." I breathed, laying down on a comfy surface.

   After the whole shenanigans of a different result that I expect yet still obtaining my object, I have just been enjoying my life to the fullest.

   There's not a lot that I have to worry about, some people may be feeling depressed due to summer vacation being over, but I beg to differ.

   Freedom was enough for me, I wouldn't dare to ask more. It's the reason that it's short that students look forward to it, and get excited at the start of it. If it was way longer wouldn't it lose its thrill? Well, that's my thoughts on the matter.

   I'm not one to complain about such things, to me, even going to school is a privilege. It's a way of freedom to me, not being shackled to the White Room. I have come to value things way more than before, when I had nothing I couldn't really tell what was precious or not. Back then those days were filled with routines after routines without any form of breaks, in the mental sense.

   To think I still am sane after experiencing that is a shock, though if I'm honest I know I never changed at all.

   My whole self is filled with many contradictions.

   I may do something or say something then right after that I make a clear contradiction.

   Sometimes I ask myself; what do I truly want? Although I know the answer to the question, I still ask it. It might be because I want to see if there's an alternative answer.

   For the same reason that Kiyotaka acts like that, is why I am who I am in this world. Perhaps I should regret ever becoming like this, yet I have this feeling deep in my heart that no matter what I have to accept this and move on. After all, I can't change what had been set in stone, these are my very own words in the exam that was just finalized.

   "Haha," I chuckled out of nowhere.

   I guess a form of depression did hit me like a truck, making me reminisce about the past. Many people wouldn't like to remember those times, but for me it's a reason to keep on moving on and enjoy the beautiful existence known as life.

   Heh, look at me getting all sentimental. Nothing wrong with that, to be able to control your emotions you can't bottle them up and get the better of you. You have to release it one way or another, this line will definitely be taken out of context...

   There's still time until summer break is over. As such, I will do some things on my to do list. Hopefully everything goes as planned!

   As I got up to start my business, my phone rang—Sudō was calling me. Hmm, I wonder what he wants.

   "Yo, Mochizuki! What are you doing right now?" he asked.

   "At the moment? Nothing, I was planning on doing something," I answered, sitting back down.

   "Is it important? Y'know I can call you later."

   "Nah. It's nothing important, it can wait. I'm going to make some food while we talk," I said, once again getting up, heading to the kitchen.

  As he heard the sound of a knife chopping something Sudō continued. "Gotcha. Speaking of food, I just ate some chicken tenders. Pretty basic stuff."

   "Was it good? I might get some instead of cooking, it's good to indulge in those kinds of food once in a while."

   "I mean, they tasted alright. But I would definitely get tired of them if I ate them too often, so I try to change things."