My legs were lifting a thousand pounds of anxiousness as I made my way to the bright blue lunch table I sat at, placing my bag down. Letting go of the dark blue leather, I raised my head and examined the room, secretly looking for her. My eyes silently darted across the crowd of Jocks, nerds, and cheerleaders, noticing the teachers looking at their phones or talking to one another as they leaned against the walls. I didn't see her though, my mind starting to feed itself doubt. Quietly, I looked back at my phone and scrolled through social media, silently looking at each post.
As I scrolled, I was stopped by the image of a familiar face. The face of Abigail, taking a selfie alongside Cassey while they were working together. I guess I had forgotten to unfollow them. Despite the fact my mind told me to unfollow the account and reload my screen, I just quietly sat there, staring at the image. Or rather, staring at her. Staring at her smile, the way her eyes looked so beautiful in that split second, how the filter was able to make the impossible possible with her natural beauty.
I still thought of her fondly, my heart gently beating as I admired her like I did all those weeks ago...
"What you lookin at?" I heard Janine's voice ask, knocking me out of my daze. Quickly, I scrolled down past the image, shooting my head up to look at her looking over my shoulder.
"Nothing," I replied, giving her an awkward smile as she sat her stuff down beside me.
"I saw the picture, you know one of them?" she asked, my smile disappearing instantaneously upon her question. I turned my head solemnly away from her, my black hair falling in front of my eyes as I quietly replied.
"Yeah, I knew both of them," I responded, keeping my eyes on the bright blue table.
"I'm sorry," she said, before reaching into her bag for the lunch box. Lifting my head, I turned towards her with a confused expression.
"Why are you saying sorry?" I asked, watching as she lifted herself up with the bag, placing it on the table.
"Because I can tell it makes you upset, so I don't want to continue to upset you with my meaningless questions," she explained, unzipping her lunch box. Lifting a ham sandwich out of it, she began chewing away at the fuzzy bread.
"It's okay, it doesn't affect me anymore," I explained, her eyes glancing up to mine as I tried to explain myself.
"Does it really?"
"Yeah." I gave her a friendly smile, trying to push back all the nervousness and pain that was building up inside of me. The text messages were starting to come back, plaguing my mind with sadness as we continued with the conversation. She stared deep into my eyes, studying every movement they made. A soft smile formed across her face as she took another bite out of her sandwich.
"hokay," she responded, her voice being muffled by the bread in her mouth.
"Ew, gross!" I said, chuckling as she continued to chew. Quietly, I turned to look outside at the senior courtyard, looking out at the bright world before me. Janine continued scarfing down her food, eating her sandwich in four bites before moving on to the small bag of chips. I didn't understand why I was so upset; I should be over it by now, right? But still, the image of her and I haunted my mind like a phantom.
Janine must have known deep down that something was bothering me, even if I said I was okay. Suddenly, the blinking of my eyes brought me back to reality, taking me out of the strange realm known as zoning out.
"You got any plans today?" Janine asked, looking towards me with a smile on her face before eating a chip.
"After school I have to go work," I stated solemnly.
YOU ARE READING
𝒮𝓉𝒶𝓇𝑔𝒶𝓏𝒾𝓃𝑔 (Stargazing)
Romance"There's always a light at the end of a dark tunnel." Kevin is now a husband and father, but as he looks through the attic, a necklace brings him back to his former years. Thinking about the impact the people back then had on him, he explains to hi...
