it all started in vegas

L.O.V.E

I've been in a daze for the past week, ever since i heard him say those three little words it's been the only thing on my mind. I haven't seen much of Austin because i decided against going to set this week, he's been coming home earlier than before but it's still late in the day so we don't spend to much time together. Even when he is home i just feel lost in my own head, i look at him and can only think about why he would say he loved me. 

My negative thoughts have completely taken over at this point, i hate that i'm this way but i can't help it as much as i want to.

I'm sitting on the couch flipping through the tv just waiting for Austin to come home, im gonna tell him tonight. I've done enough sulking and self esteem damage to myself this week, it's time to turn it around and try to spit it out. I love you.. It's only three words it can't be that hard right?

Not fifteen minutes later i hear the lock unlatch on the front door letting me know that he was home. I drew in a sharp breath and turned to look behind me, he was stood directly behind me just staring, not saying a word. It was kinda creepy.

I gave him a confused look and waited for him to say something but he didn't.

"Well hello"

His only response is the narrowing of his eyes.

"Austin? Kinda freaking me out with your whole serial killer vibe you got going on."

"You're talking to me now?" There's a sadness in his eyes as he finally speaks.

"What do you mean i'm taking to you now, when was i not talking to you?"

"For the past week i've come home, you said hello, asked how my day was and then went to sleep. This right now, is the most i've heard you talk." His finger gestures between us, and he moves around the couch to stand in front of me.
"What did i do? If i said something or did something to make you upset just please tell me, i can't take you barely acknowledging my existence. You've been a ghost of yourself."

"Austin..." I felt terrible, i thought i had hid my feelings better than that. Nothing negative i was feeling was directed at him, it was all me.

"No Cami, i'm serious. Let's just talk it out because i've been racking my brain trying to figure out what i did and it's killing me that i...."

"Austin" I try to cut off his rambling but it was hopeless.

"Can't figure it out. I mean for god sakes i...."

"Austin Robert Butler"

"I...what?" His face flashed with concern at the use of his full name.

"Would you let me get a word in?" My palms start to sweat and i catch myself trying to avoid eye contact.

"Sorry...." He sat down on the wooden table in front of me "Go on"

"You didn't do anything wrong, i had a really bad mental health week and honestly didn't realize i was taking it out on you."

"Why didn't you talk to me?" I see his face soften and he grabbed my hands in his leaning forward towards me.

"I was just really down on myself, stuff i needed to work out on my own and i did. I'm much better today."

"Why were you down on yourself?"

"I..I heard you say something the other day, when you thought i was sleeping and i just couldn't wrap my mind around it. I still don't know why you would wanna be with me when you could have anyone you wanted. I just got really stuck in my self negativity and..." I felt the tears threatening to roll down my face, i took a few deep breaths before he finally spoke up.