Back in time

When we made sense - chapter 25

*Flashback*

Kendra

"I don't want to talk about it Darius"

"Well I do"

"And so what? Just because DARIUS wants to talk about a situation we must all just follow that command? Yeah miss me with that D"

We had just got home from school and we were in my kitchen having a little disagreement.

I go and grab some water out of my fridge and throw it at his head but him and his damn reflexes caught it.

"Why'd you throw the water at me?"

"My bad for being a good host and giving you something to drink"

"Drea, you threw it at my head" he says with a straight face.

I roll my eyes, shut the fridge door and walk upstairs to my room. I hear Darius' footsteps behind me.

"Kendra we have to talk about this baby"

"Ain't nothing for us to talk about love" I say mockingly with a toothless smile.

Darius then groans in frustration. To say I'm confused is an understatement.

You when someone messes up but they feel annoyed as if they didn't start the issue.

Well this is that.

I place my water on my desk and sit in my swivel chair and wheel up to him. I am now sitting in-front of him as he is sat on my bed.

"Okay. Let's talk about it."

"What changed your mind? " he says looking at me cautiously.

"Doesn't matter. You said you wanted to talk about it. So talk"

"Okay....well what do you wanna know"

I stare into his eyes for a silent minute. Really asking myself if I wanted to know the answer to the question I was about to ask. Really asking myself if I could handle it.

Here goes nothing I guess.

"Did you sleep with her ?"

He stared into my eyes. Not saying a word. I don't know if this was because he was considering lying to me or if he was trying to gage the best way to break the news to me.

I ask again "Did you sleep with Aaliyah?"

He shakes his head and a part of me feels relief but the other part doesn't fully trust his answer.
Almost like there's something he's not telling me.

I clear my throat. "Did she give you head?"
When those words left my mouth he looked deflated. That was all the answer I needed.

"Get out of my house Darius" I say in a voice just above a whisper.

"Drea let me explain. Please baby"  he attempts to grab my hand as he says this but I pull away from him.

"Spare me the details of how much she wanted you Darius. I don't want to hear it"

"It wasn't like that baby I promise"

"So what was it like ?"

He began stumbling over his words.

I stood up and walked towards my window. The last thing I wanted was for him to see me cry.

I feel his presence behind me. "It was a stupid mistake and a moment of weakness that won't happen again"

I turn to face him with glossy eyes. "Let me just ask you this. If a guy that I knew was interested in me gave me head and it just happened, what would you do ?"

As soon as that scenario left my lips, I saw his fist clench. The irony of a man's capacity to handle the crap that they put you through will never not be amusing to me.

I'm supposed to stand here and let you explain how a girl who's been on you for a while, has had you but when I give you a hypothetical situation, you clench your fists.

Yeah men are crazy. They can never handle what they put us through.

"Well answer the question D?  Hm how would you feel if it was Ant we were talking about ? We all know that he's had a crush on me since elementary"

"Kendra don't say trash like that"

"No it's not trash. In fact lets paint the same scenario. Let's say Ant gave me head and all the boys were talking about how I felt, the sounds I made"

I could see Darius' eyes fill with rage and honestly I didn't care. In a swift moment he even ended up punching the wall behind me.

I flinched a little but I know he would never put his hands on me. He would honestly be crazy if he did.

He's a lot of things but a woman beater he is not.

I cleared my throat and spoke slightly above a whisper, with a tear coming down my face.

"Get out Darius. I do not want you in my house"

He looked at me silently as he grabbed his bag and left.

When will this pain end? Why did I have to fall in-love with my best friend?

Darius

I messed up.

I know. But honestly I don't even know why I did it.

I just got caught up and I know that's no excuse. I have feelings for Kendra. I do.

I would even go as far to say I am literally falling in love with my best friend.

But it's not that easy.

I don't feel like I'm ever going to be enough for her. I'm a thug.

I don't want her involved or exposed to nothing that I do but I can't imagine another man, loving her like I do. Making her smile like I do. Hence the wall incident, which I will pay for.

She's the best part of my day.

I've just never been in love before.

Hi everyoneeeee, it's been about 2 or 3 years since I've written in this book nd honestly I wasn't; considering coming back to it until I saw the recent adds and engagement. if you guys really want it, I'll come backkkkk. Let me know by commenting, liking and starring pages xxxxx