COMPLETED Nellie Lovett (The Virgin Widow of Fleet Street) #Wattys2016 Sweenett

Salted Caramel Lips

Chapter XXVII

"Are you dizzy?" He asked as he adjusted the sail.
Elle looked at him and shook her head then she realized, she didn't throw up that morning, and morning sicknes wasn't as bad as the previous ones. The soreness she felt when she woke up wasn't from the fact that she's pregnant. It was because of the passionate night she had shared with this man. Her husband.

She felt the heat reached her face and she blushed. She avoided his gaze and touched her baby bump.

"Have I told you, you look wonderful whenever you blush, Elle?" He touched her cheek and gently rubbed his thumb on her skin, making her blush more. Elle bowed her head shyly.

'I hope I can see you smile again, Elle.' Benjamin whispered to himself. Never had he seen her smile since that bloody night. The situation they have now is getting better and better, he gets along pretty well with his wife, but something is missing, he knows. Elle has yet to regain all that she ever was. The cheerful little girl he adored, and the strong independent woman he admired. He missed her, he still misses his Elle.

Benjamin looked up the sky and breathed before he turned to her again and pulled her closer to his side, in front of them is the wheel controlling the boat. They are getting near their destination and he decided to just let the wind get them there when he adjusted the sail.
"Elle?" His hand is on her waist.
"Hmm?" She replied.
"Tell me about Albert..." They both turned to each other. His eyes were waiting for her reply, her eyes were sad and confused.
"What...about him?" Her voice was broken and if he didn't know he was the only one who have touched her, he'll be so jealous of her late "husband".

"He wasn't really your husband, was he?" He asked as he pushed the strands of hair left from her french braided curls to the back of her ear.
"What makes you think that?" She finally asked.
"I was the only one... You were a virgin when I took you, Elle." He stated. Elle looked away again, blushing.
"He was my bestfriend..." She started. Confused, Ben searched for her eyes, her sad eyes for the man she married, for the man who is now dead. He can see love in her eyes which made him a little bitter towards Albert.
"He was in love with someone else." Her eyes looked down. He just couldn't believe what she said. No way can a man married to this beautiful woman be in love with someone else, and no way can he have as much control not to touch her, not even once.
"Why did you marry him, then?"
"I loved him." Benjamin frowned and looked away, to the sea. She loved him, he knew that before, he knew that whenever he saw her looking at his photographs above the piano, he knew that when he saw her holding his photo the day after he almost killed her. He knew she loved him, but why does it still hurts to hear her say it?
Cause he never heard her say that to him... She has never spoken of love to him or even looked him in the eyes with such love and sadness like when she speaks of Albert, and he has to know why.
"You loved him..." He repeated what she just said.
"It was complicated." She said simply, 'It is indeed.' He told himself.
"I want to know Elle... Everything."
She looked at him again and sighed before she started telling him the story of her past.
"From the start, I knew that he was in love with someone else... Someone he can never be with. Someone who will never be right for him. I went to him to talk about it one day. I needed to confirm cause I wanted to help, he was the only friend I had then, he was my bestfriend... After that incident 14 years ago, he was the only one I had, aside from my parents. He was like a brother to me. Just like how you were before you were...sent away." She looked up the sky as she refreshed her mind of the memories from her past.

"Oh, Bertie!!!" Nellie started crying after confirming what was bothering her all these years.
"Hush, love." Albert sat down on the edge of his bed beside his bestfriend to wipe her tears.
"Don't cry for me Nellie. You know how much I hate seeing you cry." He said softly and cupped her face with his palms.
"How can I not?" Another couple of tears run down from her eyes. She feels so bad for Albert. She knew he will never be happy like a normal person. The love of his life is gone, and even if that person is still around, he still cannot be with Albert. Society will never allow it. It would be a scandal for the Lovett family. A scandal in the whole of London.
"Stop crying, love. Don't waste your tears on someone like me. Someone who have grown around such beauty, but never really see it or appreciate it enough." There was sadness in his eyes as he looked at her face and pushed the strands of her hair behind her ear.
"I really wished I just felt this way towards you instead of him, you know... I really wished, I loved you instead." Tears fell from his eyes as well.
"You can't force love, Bertie." She said simply, understanding how deep where his pain is coming from.
"Indeed... That's why you have to stop crying now. One day, my time will come and I'll see his face again. In a place where we may be together..." His eyes flew away and he stared blankly on the door in front of them.
"What do you mean?" Nellie's eyebrows were almost meeting each other. Albert just stared at her for a long time before he wiped her wet face with both his thumb.
"I'm dying, Nellie." The news made her tremble, he's got to be kidding. She searched for any trace from his eyes but he was serious, and she knows him. He'll never joke about anything like this.
"I've been blessed enough I guess, this is the last blessing I will have of this world, Nellie. Death...how wonderful, right?" He smiled, and it was a very genuine smile he gave her.
Nellie began trembling, he couldn't be true.
"I know death is a scary thing for everyone. But for me, it isn't. Death is a celebration of your life, death is freedom."
"Albert!" Nellie began crying out loud, and she found herself in the arms of her bestfriend.
"You can't... What am I going to do if you leave me?! How am I going to live now?! You can't live me Bertie...!"
She was already sobbing hysterically and he was rubbing her back, his lips were on her forehead, trying to stop her from crying. She couldn't think straight at that moment. Even when Albert's mother came in the room and witnessed the scene, Nellie didn't notice that until his mother screamed at Albert.
"What have you done to Nellie?!" She yelled at him looking at Nellie crying on his chest. Albert just let out a sigh.
"Nellie, dear..." The old woman who treated her almost like her own kneeled in front of her and held her hands. Nellie just remained sobbing.
"You two, shall be married as soon as possible, Albert!" His mother shouted again as she pressed Nellie's palms.
'M-married?!' She asked herself and looked at Albert. His jaws were moving but his features became gentle when he looked at her.
"I'll marry Nellie, mother. I'll take responsibility of what happened." He finally spoke which only made her tremble more.
"Hush now, love." His mom held her hands before she wiped her tears. Nellie couldn't move, she can't even say anything. She just looked up at Albert who gave her a reassuring smile.