Summer of Sorrow ✅

Ch. 13 Planning

Drift's P.O.V.
I struggle to calm down this time while Crosshairs hugs me. I know this is why he hides how much seeing our little lady hurt hurts him, but I don't like when he does that.
We stand in the hallway in silence as I calmed down, but we didn't think we'd hear crying from our room.  Either she's crying loudly, or Mirage left the door open a little.
Scrap, did she hear me?
Crosshairs and I look at each other, worried that Jamie oddly doesn't remember that this is Cade and Vivian's house, and she thinks we left her.

I try not to think how this has become routine and that Crosshairs and I don't need to discuss the plan to comfort Jamie. Even if this doesn't happen daily, it's enough to know I go on the left side of the bed and Crosshairs goes on the right side. Laying close to Jamie.
Jamie hugs me the second I lay down, and I'm changing the routine. I hold Jamie and move to the edge of the bed, and Crosshairs moves to sit next to me.
"What's the matter?" Crosshairs asks, hoping to get Jamie to talk.
From her crying, I suspect this results from trying not to cry for a while. Even though she cried a little last night. Unless it's the thought again. I hate how I can't help her and how most humans would say this is ridiculous. 
The only thing I can do is hug Jamie. I don't think words are going to help this time.
Lightning rushes in, closes the door I failed to close, and sits on the bed beside Crosshairs. Even she knows words won't help. I gesture for her to sit next to me to reach Jamie.

Jamie calms down in a few minutes. I didn't think Crosshairs would leave, though he has to make Lightning leave. I hug Jamie close.
"Jamie, I love you so much. You know how much I'd love for us to have a baby, but I worry about you. I hate I don't know what to do."
She says nothing as I clear her up a little. Jamie knows the issues. One is how she eats very little, which is not good for humans.

Crosshairs' P.O.V.
I hug Lightning in the hallway, but we both cry.
"I hate the feeling that there's nothing we can do," she sobs.
"At least, for now, we can ensure she enjoys the vacation. I know it's not great, but it's something."
"Then what?! Nothing! If Optimus, Ratchet, and Rung can't think of anything, even Drift, then what else can we do?!"
"We'll think about that later."
Lightning goes downstairs while I check on my friends. Jamie and Drift lay on the bed.

Drift watches who's coming in.
"Is she ok?" I ask.
"Yeah, for now."
I look at Jamie and remember what Ratchet said on our Christmas vacation.
She needs to be shown love.
It's hard, though, with all the years of hurting and humans not understanding. Even though it's best right now, I worry she thinks Drift doesn't love her to start a family — or add on, considering we're all like family.

It's not long before Jamie falls asleep. Drift looks at me disappointed. It's hard; we could think what would happen if we were part of the team who came here to retrieve the AllSpark? But what good would that be? It's been twelve years since we met Jamie, and look where we are. How would an additional five years help? Drift, and I feel like things went downhill over the past four years. It's still scrap what she's been dealing with pretty much since this adventure started.
"How long before she leaves?" Drift asks with tears rolling down his face, "by terminating this adventure then... or..."
Drift struggles to say that our little lady will look to end her life. Will we find her dead here and then in her dimension, or will she close the portal, and we can't stop her from killing herself in her dimension?
"We'll protect her," I assure him, "the others will help us. Do you want Mirage to watch her like he did in February?"
"I don't know," he sobs.
I worry nightmares will return for both of us.

"Crosshairs?" I hear Optimus, already concerned, "is everything ok?"
I sigh, "no, Jamie is struggling already, and Drift is terrified."
"And you're hiding how you are feeling?"
"I have to, but I don't think it's working either. Everyone worries about Jamie and will keep her safe, but..."
"There are things that can't be done."
"Even with everyone helping us. There are things we're struggling to deal with."
"Things you two don't want to tell everyone?" Scrap, we're in trouble, "I understand. Everyone already dreads not being able to help Jamie. I trust you two aren't hiding serious medical concerns from the medics."
I wonder if he knows? But I'd rather not say anything.

Optimus Prime's P.O.V.
Once Crosshairs goes downstairs, I have Inferno, Mirage, Prowl, and Sunstreaker asking about security.
"Lily wants to spend time with Jamie, so this could be ready," Sunstreaker argues.
"Could be easy, or Jamie is in no mood for others aside from her guardians and sister," Prowl argues.
I didn't think he'd agree with Crosshairs' family mindset.
"Then plan B; I follow them while invisible," Mirage adds.
"I think it's wise to get her to want us with her," Inferno insists.
They don't like hearing that we'll have to plan last minute, but it should be easy to keep Jamie safe. Mirage argues he'll follow the three invisible, but I'd rather not go this route.
Crosshairs and Drift aren't telling us everything, and I know they'd tell us anything serious, but I don't like how they won't tell me everything. Even if I tell them, I won't tell anyone else. I shouldn't be feeling this way, but I feel like I'm being kept out of my daughter's life rather than knowing what troubles a friend has. How can I not feel this way with how much I worry about her? How much I've watched her hurt?
I look in the room, seeing Drift and Jamie asleep. Even while asleep, Drift has a worried expression. He has Jamie close to him, but I wouldn't be surprised if that's how the two sleep. I'm both happy that Jamie loves someone — though I never thought she'd fall for an Autobot — and hurt knowing the pain they're both in. I don't think Drift will tell me anything, but I think I understand his fears and sadness.