Family: Out of Business

Clarified

EJ's pov

"Are you done being mad at me yet?" my niece asked. Without giving me a chance to answer, she clarified her question, "Cuz you're not saying anything. You're just kinda looking at me funny and it's weird."

"Yes, Claire, I'm done being mad at you. For now anyway, because God knows, that's not gonna last. You'll do something stupid, bratty, rude, or annoying eventually and then I'll be tasked with straightening you out because your father and aunt can't be bothered and they both know I'm the smartest and strongest of the siblings and therefore the most capable and qualified so..."

"Uh, can I go now?" the plebeian interrupted me, her most benevolent uncle. "Cuz you've been rambling on senselessly for a while now and I get the feeling I don't need to be here for this."

Hmmm, that must be a new record.

"You made it all of twenty-two seconds before you were impudent again, mia nipote (my niece). Nicely done," I retorted sarcastically.

"Thanks. So is that a yes on the, can I go now?" she asked, starting to get up and walk away.

"Yes, Claire, you may go," I said, sighing and shaking my head. I really could use some super powers when dealing with the clueless waif. I've said it before and I'll say it again, an uncle's work is never done.

Claire's pov

Finally, my uncle let me go. I just went over there this morning to eat my pop-tart while looking at the flowers in the garden, well that and the fact my father told me to go talk to my uncle. Ever since the whole soccer versus homework debacle yesterday, Uncle EJ's been acting really weird. I mean he's always been kinda weird but I usually just chalk that up to him being British. This was different though.

Before I could make it up the staircase to my room, my father called out to me, "Claire, I'd like a word with you please. Come to the living room."

I've always thought that saying was kinda funny. I'd like a word with you. It's never just one word as the sentence implies, at least not in my experience. In fact, it's usually several words. Sometimes with my uncle, it's a few short commands like he's speaking to a dog, sit stay speak, but even then it's still followed up with a lot more words and a few insults thrown in to boot. Anyway, I'm sure this exchange with my father will entail more than enough words.

"Coming, Father," I sighed heavily, making my way back down the stairs.

As soon as I entered his field of vision, he motioned me over to the seat next to him on the sofa.

"Tell me how your conversation with your uncle went."

Counting silently in my head instead of responding, I deduced he's already at nine words and we're just getting started.

"Claire?" my father questioned, knowing I wasn't paying attention as I was lost in my head for a moment.

Shaking myself away from the tangent I was currently fixating on, I replied, "Yes," trying to act like I was listening all along.

"Didn't you speak to Uncle EJ this morning?" he asked, trying to redirect my focus.

That's eight more I thought, nine actually, including the repeat of my name. So let's see, we're up to eighteen now and the conversation hasn't even begun. There's no way anything of substance could be accomplished between two people by the utterance of just one word. Is there? I mean someone could bark a one word command at the other person and incite an action on their part but that's not really meaningful, not from a discussion point of view anyway. I think it would have to be at least a whole sentence. Yeah, one word just wouldn't cut it.