~Guilt~

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POV (Y/n)

-1 day in the Scorch-

I don't sleep like everyone else on the aircraft. I don't need nightmares to wake me, because my memories are bad enough. I stare at the passing sand dunes, and when the craft finally lands I'm the first one to run off. On the aircraft, I was too closed in and I needed to escape the stale air. As we all ran to the building in the distance the guards around us shouted about cranks and fired their guns relentlessly. As soon as we were safely secured inside we moved again to another closed-up room.

I felt caged in again as I stood arms crossed in the small room "why did they just leave us here?" I ask no one as I look around and of course, no one answers because no one knew. We are pulled out of our thoughts by the creaking of the large metal door opening "you kids doing alright?" A man asks as he enters the room, and we move quickly over to him. "Sorry about all the fuss, we had ourselves a bit of a swarm," he goes on to explain, but this guy sets me on edge.

I keep my eyes narrowed on him not daring to trust him. "Who are you?" Thomas asks feeling just as defensive "I'm the reason you're all still alive, it's my intention to keep you that way," the man states, and I want to scoff at his words. Did he get us past the griever back in the maze? Man, I must have missed that. "Now, come with me. We'll get you kids squared away," he says walking out of the room expecting us to follow, and we do with some hesitation. "You can call me Mr. Janson. I run this place," he explains as we walk through the noisy corridor.

"For us, it is a sanctuary, safe from the horrors of the outside world. You should all think of it as a way station. Kind of a home between homes," He explains and my brother is stupid enough to ask "that mean you're taking us home?" I can't help but roll my eyes. The word home makes a memory flash in my head of a warm morning spent in a warmer embrace with rough fingers in my hair. I feel my fingers stray to the faded gray mark on my wrist and I swear I can still feel the pulse of life in it, but Gally is dead.

"A home of sorts, a refuge, outside the scorch. Where WICKED will never find you again. How does that sound?" Janson asks and I glare at him, what's the catch? What is this game? He says everything like we didn't just lose the only world we'd ever known yesterday. Everything he says is just to... scripted. "Why should we trust you?" I spat out not believing a word out of this guy so far. "I understand your wariness but let's just say the world out there is in a rather precarious situation, and we're all hanging on by a very thin thread. The fact that you kids can survive the flare virus makes you the best chance of humanity's continued survival. Unfortunately, it also makes you a target, as no doubt you've noticed," he explains.

I scoff "unfortunately," I mutter under my breath, that word doesn't begin to cover it. "Beyond this door lies the beginning of your new lives," Janson tells us as he opens the large metal door and I feel a sting of pain at the word new lives. Before we pass through Janson turns to us, "first things first, let's do something about that smell," he tells us and we're led to showers. Teresa and I are separated from the boys, and when I strip off my clothes I feel a tear fall. My clothes are covered in Gally's blood and it was overwhelming. I stood in the shower letting the hot water run over me and I feel myself sink to my knees. I close my eyes and the memories of the first shower I can remember sting through my brain.

I had Gally stand watch, and he held his eyes shut tightly the whole time. I cried into the shower mourning him, and over the overwhelming guilt, his memory brought. 

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