starlight - jaylor AU

date

- Taylors Pov -

What the fuck do I wear for this date? I need to wear something warm because it's the middle of October. I can't believe we are already six weeks into the school year because I feel like its flown by, but regardless, now I need to figure out what to wear.

«What are you getting dressed for?» Selena asks from the spot on her bed. Its Saturday and she asked me to join her on what she called lazy day. It apparently involves lying In bed and watching movies all day while eating junk food. she has even bribed tom to get her food from an actual junk food place and not the cafeteria.

If I didn't have plans, I might have joined her but skipped the junk food. I don't do fat filled food. She can get away with it because she looks beautiful, but I will look fat instantly if I let myself splurge on that kind of food. I'm already big and I don't want to get any bigger. The scale says I've lost weight, but I don't believe it. Sure some of my clothes don't fit as well anymore, but it's no big deal. I'm only doing it to make myself fit in more, and my body still works perfectly fine.

«I'm going out in the city today. I'm going to plug in my earplugs and walk around like I used to do when I came here with my dad and he was working» I did use to do that while he worked, only after I turned 17 years old, in full daylight and with a tracker on both my phone and Apple Watch just in case. But still I got to walk around alone as long as I had followed my meal plan. it was one of the things I looked forward to while in treatment, to just get to explore the city on my own without people hovering over me.

«Have fun. Just be careful. You have pepper-spray, right?» She says and I nod «yes, my dad got me several before I came here. And I've always had one hanging right inside my purse anyway. Can't be too careful» I've thankfully never had to use it, but you never know.

I settle on a pair of Burgundy pants, a plaid button up in a dark gray, almost black, color. I have these lace up brown boots with a slight heel I've decided to wear, as well as my short brown coat. It's starting to get chilly, but it's not parkas weather either. I am putting on a dark bluish green scarf and gloves though.

After checking my makeup one last time, the last thing I want is for my mascara to have smudged down my face, I head downstairs to meet Joe. I'm not wearing heavy makeup, just my light daily stuff. We decided to keep the date casual, to relieve some pressure, which I'm thankful for.

I walk all the way outside and around the corner of the building, right by the entrance to the subway station, where he is already waiting for me. We decided it was too risky to meet inside as we are still trying to keep this from everyone else. They do know we went to the bookstore together, but that was no big deal. This is a date, an actual date.

«You look beautiful» he says and take my hand. It's a simple gesture but sends sparks all over my body anyway. «Thank you» I mumble before we head down to the subway. Our fingers are intertwined, and it feels so right. It's also convenient because there are a lot of people down here and I don't want to get lost from him.

We get off at the right stop and walk hand in hand towards the edge of Manhattan. I can faintly see the Hudson River before us, and we slowly get there. «It's so beautiful down here. My dad took me down here once and we got some to-go lunch so we could sit and look out at the water while we ate» I say.

«It's beautiful. We should head out to the statue sometime, that would be fun» he says, and we reach the railing. There is a decent amount of people down here, but not an overwhelming number of people thankfully. Living in New York you have to get used to being in a sea of people whenever you step outside, so I appreciate anytime we get some space here.

«We really should. And I have plenty of spaces I could show you in New York if you want» I want to show him around and take him to all my favorite places. New York is more than times square. it's easy to get wrapped up in all the billboards there, but if you head outside the heart of Manhattan there are so much more exciting things to see.