Unrequited Love | [Meteor Garden] Huaze Lei

Chapter 13

As night fell, I fixed my attention on the villa's enormous windows. As I clutched my warm hands, I could hear the servants getting ready for the New Year.

I now have another day to live thanks to God. He promised to give me a fresh start so I could complete my unfulfilled commitment. I have a life that I should cherish because it could end at any point.

He helped me understand that...

Lei's words keep repeating all over my head. I just want everything to finish yet he always make my head turn back again.

And I hated it...even knowing this what I wanted before.

I look to the palm of my hands as I thought about everything. After this year, things will get complicated to me.

Should I just tell him to stay friends with me, just like this. But...I have dreamed to stand beside him, for so long already.

But if I continue, would I be happy if there are doubts around my head? Lei... Cared for me but, something I knew wouldn't be love as a friend.

I'm not like Shancai, I act as a victim too much and I felt coward knowing that that's the only way I will get his attention.

Was too act weak...

But my emotions doesn't let me hold back, it's frustrating.

I hate...choices...

Lei seem to notice that I'm slowly thinking of staying as friends with him, the words he stated, was that really for me, or Shancai?

Lei is not the one who will immediately abandoned his first love because she chose to pursue her dream than stay.

He, never truly moved on from Jing yet...

I heard someone's footsteps nearing my direction making me snap on my thoughts all over there.

I saw the man I was thinking of as he stood near me. "The fireworks are about to start, won't you join us?"

His calm voice ring through my ears as I look over the balcony tiredly. How can I talk to him about yesterday's confession. I shakily sighed and look over him. "Lei..."

I called out as Lei waited for me to speak as I tightly close my eyes and look away. "Another year will begin... Marking 5,316 days ever since I first met you"

I started as I pursue my lips and look over the sky as the sparkling light exploded creating a beautiful scenery. Something that I can ruined so easily. "Lei... I think I'm ready to start again on my life after those long days. Without you on my life"

I painfully smiled at him as his expression never faltered. "I...". I stopped on my words as I watch his expressions for a while. "I want to start my life again, as a new identity, as a new person. Because... the pain you have caused me still hovers around my heart and mind."

I let out as a tear fell from my eyes, "The words you said, made me make my final decision. I want to live peacefully. I once told you, I would stop looking my happiness on the same person where I lost it."

I continued as I look away. I knew he was letting me speak before he react, my decision was still not clear for him. "I don't accept your love and care for me"

"Why?"

I heard him immediately spoke after I let the bomb explode. "Every part of my being... can't accept it"

"No matter how much you look at it, You still love Jing, even on how much you deny it" I explained to him as I settled that very decision within me. "Please stop thinking you loved me, because of your pity when I love you for so long. I would like to tell you, I once fell in love with another person. This love of mine, wouldn't last long anymore"