THE WHORE DIARIES

18: SESSION

TINA: I was listening to Beyoncé this morning and I remembered you... You're so sexy, I think about you while I'm peeing and washing the toilet... You turn me on... I'll be your porny droplet. A single drop of sweat trickles down my cleavage and slides towards the lacy Victoria's Secret bra, followed by your gaze. I will be unholy to you, but not unfaithful. I want you to fill me like you're taking away my virginity, to enter me slowly, then to scream, then to jump high like a bungee jump... I'd beg you on my knees, on my knees, and then I'd let you squeeze my bottom as hard as to squeeze a swollen mandarin... I want you to stretch my pussy so much that I get stretch marks everywhere... I'll pray for you, I'll never be dry for you, I'll cook you my sexy pizza at a hundred degrees... I'm dying of love, I'm erotic like an oak tree ! I'm flexible like a screwdriver, I can stand on one foot and lift the other high, high, like the Leaning tower of the Eiffel Tower. Mmmmm... I like to take vitamin D regularly, especially yours... It's so exotic, mystical and hot... I like guys who drink brandy and even more so those from exotic countries. I want to leak like a hydrant when I see you from afar. Wrap your lips around me and inhale every inch of me. Do you want to put your mouth on THIS? I want to doodle your dildo until it changes its name to dodol. I want your juicy Italian sausage in all my creases and crevices, but I'm afraid of getting the blue waffle. It's because of you that I eat breadsticks with Eurocream.

Tina was sitting in a wide and comfortable armchair the color of a tampon package at psychotherapist Ana's session again and was just reading her notes from her neon sex notebook. Ana was stunned, shocked, but also DTF.

TINA: Here is a passage from my book.

ANA: Come on, explain to me, what is this? Whore diary?

TINA: Well, I'm very erotic and I write well, and I want to collect all my sexy messages and publish them. Like fifty shades of grey, but not trash.

ANA: Fine. And what do you think about it, will you succeed?

TINA: Well, I would say yes. I have a relationship, my uncle has a lot of guys, he works in the ministry and then he can arrange a publishing house meeting for me...

ANA: Yes. Is there anything else bothering you?

TINA: Well actually... Yes. My boyfriend is very sexually aggressive, and that's why I decided to send him these messages to calm him down. I mean, he's quite expressive and he's all like that, full of himself... And Sonja told me not to do that because she's afraid I'll get HIV. And I think that Sonja has a big ego and that she wears too tight a neckline, I think, little by little, her button breaks, I think like, she takes dick too much and she's fed up. What should I do about it?

ANA: Eat a toasted sandwich.

TINA: And Sonja?

ANA: Well, let him buy more expensive things. I buy my wardrobe only in Zara and sexy shops.

TINA: Ok, I'll pass it on to her.

ANA: Anything else?

TINA: Let's say, when I go to campus, I see a character there, and because of him I get wet in places where I shouldn't. And I feel like I'm cheating on that Italian because of that. And I mean, he's beautiful, handsome, blond, plump... And this one is Italian again and like, I want to be like a double-filled donut - a little white, a little black cream. Like, honey, honey -- your pussy fell off for money!?

ANA: Honey, I'm not your gynecologist, but a psychotherapist. I think you should be less sexual.

TINA: But I'm less sexual. I could even say that I am dry as the Sahara! Last week, Sonja had intercourse with as many as 19 men, and I only had with one!

ANA: yes, but how many times a week?

TINA: 26...

ANA: That's what I'm talking about.