Beautiful Mistake [a Roman Reigns story]

4 A shattered dream

Roman POV

What a beautiful dream this was. I knew I was asleep and that this would be over the minute, the second I woke up. Desperately I clung to this fantasy as I tried with all I had not to wake up. I didn't want it to disappear, didn't want to lose it.

The sunset bathed everything in golden, warm light. The sound of the waves breaking on the beach... The children's laughter echoed over to us as I held Lily tightly in my arms. She looked up at me. A small, happy smile on her lips. Nothing bad could happen to us here. It felt so right. The way it always did when I spent time with her. No matter how short those moments were. Or how bad we felt afterwards.

I leaned down and pressed my lips very lightly on hers. I could almost feel the smile on her lips.

Here in this dream world, there was only us. But of course that didn't last forever. I felt myself waking up. I squeezed my eyes tightly shut, hoping to prolong the good feeling for a little bit longer. It just didn't work.

My hand slid across the sheet, expecting to be able to pull Lily against me one last time. A part of me didn't give up hope that maybe I could still convince her to give us a chance.

But that little spark died out almost immediately when my fingertips found nothing. Only the already cold sheet. No Lily. I opened my eyes and looked around the room. Nothing even indicated that she had been here. A knot formed in my stomach. Something told me that something had changed. I just didn't know what exactly.

I reached for my phone and dialed her number. After three seconds, however, the call went straight to voicemail. With a deep sigh I hung up. It made no sense to leave her a message.

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A few hours later, I was dragging myself through the corridors backstage, totally depressed. My eyes wandered around. I was looking for the woman who had me under her spell. But it didn't take long until I gave up. My feeling told me that it made no sense, that she was not here.

But I wanted confirmation. So I asked someone I knew I would get information from.

"Hey, Renée. Have you seen Lilian?" I asked.

Only a few people backstage called her Lily and I wasn't officially one of them.

"Lily? No... haven't you heard? She quit. Just like that, out of the blue. I tried calling her, but to no avail. I wondered what got into her. What did you want from her?" replied Renée.

"Oh... um... that's not important anymore I guess. Just forget about it." I mumbled as I turned away from her and looked for an empty room.

I tried to breathe deeply, but I just couldn't. I braced myself against the cold wall with my hands. My breath began to hitch as I desperately tried to get a grip on myself. But I did not succeed. 

Instead, I felt like I was falling. I fell into a deep hole. Everything I dreamed of and hoped to get was torn from my hands. No matter how hard I tried to hold on to it, it was already gone. A part of me disappeared. A dream shattered.