scream group chat fic

fight club

Richie: there is a tyler durden inside all of us

Amber: maybe if you're a schizophrenic insomniac

Richie: i just like that movie

Amber: me too

Jill: shut the fuck up i'm trying to sleep

Richie: why are you sleeping?

Jill: BECAUSE ITS FUCKING 2AM YOU DUMB SHIT

Amber: Jill...

Jill: WHAT

Amber: you do realise that it's literally 12am right?

Jill: shut the fuck up you're trying to trick me

Amber: literally look at your fucking phone clock

Jill:

Jill: oh shit you're right

Jill: oh that's why olivia isn't here right now, why didn't she wake me?

Richie: she's probably one of those creeps who enjoys watching people
sleep

Jill: i don't like that thought

Jill: but at least it ain't true cause i don't see her hiding in the dark corners of my room

Amber: i still see your shadows in my room can't take back the love that i gave you

Jill: stop

Amber: ok

Jill:

Jill: you know what?

Jill: you two are surprisingly enough, more chill than sidney and roman

Richie: *not surprising*

Jill: so thank you for waking me up instead of them

Richie: yuh

Amber: whatevs

Roman: Jill

Jill: GET OUT NO

Jill: I WAS HAVING SUCH A CALM AND RELAXED MORNING BEFORE YOU SHOWED UP

Jill: GET OUT

Roman: wakey wakey its time for school

Roman: come on get up its time for school man come on

Jill: GO AWAY

Roman: ding ding

Jill: STOP RINGING THE FUCKING DOORBELL GET AWAY FROM MY HOUSE

Roman: let me in

Jill: nO

Roman: i'll be back.

Jill: no you won't

-

Richie: this movie makes me wanna like...

Richie: make soap and sell it

Richie: y'know?

Amber: definitely

Amber: maybe this would be more legal and better to do instead of cooking meth

Richie: this is something we can do

Jill: GUYS I NEED YOUR HELP QUICK

Amber: what

Jill: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE CAN YOU GUYS COME TO MY HOUSE AND BOARD UP ALL THE WINDOWS AND DOORS FROM THE OUTSIDE?

Jill: I'LL BOARD UP THE INSIDE OF MY HOUSE WHILST YOU DO THE OUTSIDE

Amber: ugh can it wait? me and richie are watching fight club at tara's house while she's at work

Richie: yeah we're a little busy

Richie: oh by the way amber can you order us a large pizza and some cokes for when we watch american psycho next?

Amber: yup i'll do it now

Richie: thanks bro

Jill: GUYS!

Jill: ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW?

Jill: MY COUSIN IS GONNA COME BACK LATER AND KILL ME, AND YOU TWO ARE HAVING FUCKING PIZZA MOVIE MARATHONS?!?!

Richie: can't you just ask charlie? why us?

Jill: charlie is incompetent

Richie: what about mickey

Jill: he's getting drunk at a party right now

Richie: Billy and Stu

Jill: on a date

Richie: well i guess you're screwed

Jill: WHY CAN'T YOU ASSHOLES DO IT? YOU'RE NOT AS BUSY AS THEM YOU'RE JUST SITTING IN TARA'S HOUSE AND  WATCHING MOVIES

Richie: we're devoted to cinema

Jill: FUCK YOU BOTH YOU'RE BOTH SELFISH CUNTS

Richie: dude, just board up your house from the inside and lock the doors and windows, it's really not that hard.

Jill: but what if he finds a way in?

Richie: just lock yourself in the fucking basement and act like you're not there

Richie: it's literally so easy

Jill: YOU DONT KNOW MY COUSIN AS WELL AS I DO

Richie: well no shit sherlock, he's your cousin.

Jill: Trust me...

Jill: he will ALWAYS. find a way in.

Richie: not much i can do about that

Jill: FUCK YOU, IF I DIE THIS IS ON YOU AND AMBER.

Richie: whatevs

Amber: yo richie

Amber: pizza time 🍕🥤

Richie: YE YUHHHHH

Amber: COME ON SET UP AMERICAN PSYCHO

Richie: YUS

-

Jill: im so scared.

Roman: i have returned

Jill: oh fuck no

Roman: i am inside your house

Jill: what the fuck how

Roman: axe

Jill: DUDE WHY WOULD YOU BREAK THE FUCKING DOOR NOW OLIVIA'S GONNA KILL ME FOR THAT

Roman: okay.

Roman: 1: im not THAT cruel, so i broke the window instead with the axe

Jill: as if that's any better

Roman: and 2: not if i kill you first

Jill: NO

Roman: ooh a suspiciously locked basement door, how clever.

Roman: whapaw

Jill: fuck

Roman: hello Jill

Jill: FUCK

Roman: u a ded bish fool

Jill: NO WHY