Enhanced || JJK

XXXVI. Building On A Lie

"So Jimin is someone who comes to these meetings with you?" I asked then, when he broke the hug, sensing that he now felt more comfortable talking about it.
"Yeah, he introduced me to them... I got to know him online, he leaves the worst comments about GM stuff, he's a hardcore hater despite being a GM himself, so you wouldn't really like him... But I chatted with him for a while and he seemed nice after all, so I accepted his invite and started hanging out... that's when he showed me the support group..." Jungkook explained, seeming more relaxed.
"I don't know, maybe I'll like him, who knows... He's your friend after all, and I trust your judgment, even if we have different opinions about genetic modification... So, next time we see him you won't kick him away, right?" I asked sarcastically.
He finally laughed.
"No, no, I'll let you two talk... I should also call him to explain and apologise later..." He said, admitting he had wronged his friend. "Also, please don't talk about any of this in front of my family, they don't know..." He added.
"Not even your sister?" I asked.
"No, I just feel like she'd worry about me... Turning it into a way bigger deal than it is", he explained.
"But it is a big deal! And I feel like she would be your biggest supporter... But, yeah, I'm fine with being the only one who knows", I smiled, proud, making him chuckle.

He then walked me back home. We were silent, but we were both smiling and holding hands and we knew that we didn't need words to explain what we were feeling. To be honest with myself, I didn't believe in what Jungkook, Tae, Jimin and others like them believed in, but I could see their point. And most importantly I knew them as people and I knew that them hating being GMs was way better than those who love being a GM and make you feel miserable if you're not. So maybe I didn't agree with them, but that didn't make me wanna run away, that just made me more eager to talk about it with them and see if their argumentation would convince me. It was funny to think that now all the people closest to me were GM, but that didn't make me feel any less valuable, because they didn't make me feel like that and because I didn't believe I was. People are just people, whatever their genetic composition is, it's their heart that matters, it's how they treat you and how they act that matters. And I was happy to have been lucky enough to be aware of that knowledge.

"Hey, wait a second! You just called me 'babe'!" He said, interrupting the silence and my thoughts.
"Whaaaat? Nope, that never happened!" I answered defensively, feeling slightly embarrassed for letting that slip out a few moments earlier. In that moment, I simply wanted to make him feel I was there for him and so that word came out.
"Yes, you did! I remember it clearly! It was sweet... I mean, a little mainstream, but sweet..." He said laughing and I was happy he was back to teasing me again. It meant he was in a good mood and I liked it because it reminded me of his words the day he confessed. That when he teases me he's actually saying he likes me.
"Yeah, well fine, 'babe' might be a little mainstream, but at least I don't call you by your last name!" I countered alluding to the way he always calls me.
"You're joking? That's sweet! 'Cause you're my moon! I even saved your contact as a moon emoji!" He said and I remembered when he showed me his phone. I have to admit I melted a little bit, even though I didn't quite grasp what 'being his moon' meant.
"As in you're the Earth and I spin around you? 'Cause that doesn't sound super sweet..." I asked with a questioning look.
"No, as in you're my light in the dark... As in I would think of you when I was going through my hardest times and I'd feel better... Now don't throw up, please!" He begged and I could tell he felt vulnerable telling me things like that, so I tried not to make a joke out of it and smiled.
"That's sweet! I can't promise I'll find a pet name as meaningful, so I'll just call you 'babe' in the meantime, okay?" I asked, while we stopped in front of my house. Then I gave him a kiss on the cheek.
"You can call me whatever you want, moon..." He pulled me in for a real kiss.

I wanted to ask him about the hardest times he had talked about and how thinking of me helped him, I wanted to know that and much more. But I also knew there was no rush, I knew we would have all the time in the world to talk about all those things.
"Hey hey, no kissing in front of my door!" I jumped hearing my dad's voice from the intercom.
Jungkook pulled away immediately and automatically lifted his hands up as if the police had caught him red-handed. I chuckled and then face-palmed.
"Dad, come on!" I scolded him, while Jungkook was bowing 90 degrees, apologising.
"I'm very sorry, Mr. Moon, that won't happen again!"
"I sure hope not, kid! Just know I'm watching your every move!" He continued, with a threatening tone.
"Dad, stop fooling around, he doesn't know you're joking!"
"Because I'm not, now get back inside, young lady! Lunch is almost ready!" And then the intercom turned off.

"He hates me! I messed up and now he hates me!" Jungkook said, looking very worried.
"No, he doesn't, he was just joking... partly... I mean, my parents don't know you that well, so obviously they don't really trust you, but they know me and I wouldn't choose just any guy... And since you're the first guy I've dated..."
"No, I'm not! What are you talking about? You dated that guy after the Winter Prom, the first year of high school, and then I saw you kissing that one guy at the uni party last year! So you can tell me I'm the one who was always with someone different, but you didn't seem to be so lonely yourself..." He sounded jealous and petty and that was music to my ears.
"Hahaha well, yeah I might have been seeing a couple different people throughout the years, I mean what did you want me to do? But it's not like we were serious about it..." I laughed.
"You weren't?" He asked.
"No, with Mino we just hung out for a couple months after the Winter Prom and with Dongwoo last year we were kind of on and off for four months..." I explained. I mean, I had kissed other guys and flirted too, but they were naturals, it felt different, it didn't feel like there was a huge gap between us, like I used to feel about Jungkook before getting to know him better.
"Fine, I can't really say anything, I did the same... And I trust you..." Him, on the other hand, had only dated GM girls, so we both started from scratch on that matter.
I liked the fact that we could create something special, something of our own and I could see that our future was bright if we only kept trusting each other and believing in each other's feelings.

And exactly for this reason I began feeling uneasy, because the whole thing about the plan Tae and I had come up with popped back into my head and I suddently felt like I was keeping that secret from him. And it wasn't just any secret, it was something that could've hurt him or changed his opinion about me or both. Saying that I was scared of him finding out is an understatement and, sure, I could've simply kept it to myself forever, Tae wouldn't have said anything either, but I didn't like that feeling. The one you feel when you're lying to someone. After all, the plan was the exact reason we got closer and finally ended up together. Was I supposed to lie everytime we reminisced on that story?