Of Love and Shadows

The Spymaster

Thalia

Madja had to reset my nose to stop the bleeding and for it to heal. It hurt like a motherfucker. She also healed my eye and busted lip even though I told her that it wasn't necessary; it would heal on its own. Madja insisted because Azriel would barely leave my side and she figured out we were mates, but she promised to not tell anyone.

Azriel and I agreed to wait to tell the Inner Circle about the bond. I wanted to heal from all the trauma and Azriel said he would wait. And I was thankful for that; it made me fall for him even more.

I was just getting out of the bath when I heard, more like sensed, he came back into the room. I dressed in a pair of soft leggings and a black shirt before stepping out of the bathroom.

"I want to talk to you," Azriel said. His shadows were surrounding him in what looked like black armor as if he had to protect himself from what he had to say.

I went over to the sitting area before the fireplace and reached for the matches on the mantel.

"Talk," I said after he had stood in silence for a moment.

"It's about the mating bond,"

I paused from striking the match I had in my hand.

"Okay," I said, turning to him.

I strike the match and throw it into the fireplace. Even though I could easily light the fireplace with my magic, I needed something to do with my hands since I had the sudden urge to touch the spymaster.

"I haven't been completely honest with you," Azriel said. "If you are going to be my mate, then I have to tell you the truth."

"You aren't obligated to tell me anything, Azriel," I shook my head. "I can learn to love you, scars and all."

Azriel looked at me with surprise in his hazel eyes. "You can?"

I approached the male and cupped his face, pulling his forehead down to mine. I was so small I had to reach up on my tiptoes even to reach the top of his chest, but Azriel didn't seem to mind as he settled his big, scarred hands on my waist.

"You say that as if you can't be loved," when he didn't say anything, I knew I was right. "Azriel, everyone here loves you, even Amren, so please don't think you aren't loved."

"No one has ever said that to me," Azriel whispered.

"Well, you needed to hear it," I pulled back and looked into his hazel eyes.

"Thank you,"

"Don't thank me for telling the truth,"

"No, I mean it, Thalia," Azriel placed his hand over his heart. "Thank you."

I felt my heart swell at the sincerity in his eyes and wanted to cry.

But I sucked it up and said, "No problem, Az."

===============

Azriel and I had gone up to the townhouse to see the rest of the Inner Circle after talking for hours. I told him the story of why I had run away, I told him every detail. Throughout it, Azriel listened to me, though I could tell there was anger and strain in his eyes at the things he heard about my father beating me for just fighting and using magic. Azriel hadnt said anything as I told him about everything, even the things I hadnt told Rhysand and Feyre. It felt nice to get things off my shoulder.

I listened when Azriel began to tell me his story, of how he met Cassian and Rhys. He made me laugh a few times through his story, and I felt thankful that he had made me laugh. Though I felt angry at how he was treated as a child I kept my comments to myself because I didn't know if he wanted me to say anything about it.

It was nice to talk to Azriel. He made me laugh and want to cry for him. He made me fall harder for the spymaster and all of his scars.

As we approached the dining room in the townhouse, only Feyre, Rhysand, and Mor were here. No sight of Cassian, Nesta, or Elain, they must still be at the House. Amren was surely at her secluded apartment. They were all talking when we came in and only Mor stopped talking to Feyre to wave me over. I smiled at the beautiful blonde and sat next to her. Azriel sat across from me and gave me a cute wink.

Mor handed me a glass of wine and I took it. "How are you this evening, Thalia?" she asked me.

"I'm good, thank you," I said as I took a sip from the wine.

"Would you like to go dancing with me this evening?"

"I would love to," I said, then looked down. "Should I change?"

I was still in my pants and black shirt, it wasn't necessarily dancing attire.

"Only if you want to," Mor said as she took a long swig from her wine glass.

"Okay," I began piling my plate with lots of meats and vegetables.

I hadn't been dancing in over five months so hopefully, I could still dance.