Confessions

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Xan's POV

"Are you avoiding talking with Leo?" Sage asks in a knowing tone making me freeze up.

Shit. How does she know?

It's been about three weeks since I decided I wanted to tell Leo about Ashley. Though the investigation hasn't moved forward. Apparently it's way harder to build a case on things from long ago. Luckily for us we have the best of the best on our side. It'll just take time.

Now i'd be a liar if I said that i'm not a bit relieved that everything will be out and exposed so soon. Yet me being me, used this time to procrastinate on telling Leo which isn't good.

"I haven't had any time to speak with him." I lie smoothly watching her narrow her eyes at me. Of course the woman knows i'm lying. Somehow she knows everything. I couldn't even keep anything from her nowadays if I tried.

"Xan what's worrying you? Leo's a great friend he should be more than understanding." Sage comments sliding on some gym tights. She had be bickering about getting in the gym all week and now she's finally going with Ciara, Niko, Kevin and Kassidy.

No i'm not happy. Yes I want her all to my fucking self.

"I'm not worried." I say sending her a smile to throw her off. So what i'm nervous that Leo's going to change his mind about me and see me as less? So what i'm worried he'll pity me? So fucking what?

"Baby." Sage calls out again with soft eyes, and i'm forced to look at her pretty face. "Leo loves you in his own bros before hoes type of way. He would never see you as less for something like this. Talk to him."

I hate that she was probably right.

"It's no longer bros before hoes sweetheart. We both decided that our women come first." I reply attempting to redirect the conversation. And of course she sees right through that.

"Cute." Sage says walking towards me placing a peck on the corner of my mouth, and I immediately want more. "Real cute. Stop trying to distract me."

"Kiss me again." I shoot out watching her shake her head playfully.

"Not if you don't talk to me."

Of fucking course.

Sensing that I didn't really want to talk she stepped away from me—to my distaste—giving me a once over.

"You know, no one's forcing you to tell Leo? I'm just worried about you. If you aren't ready to tell your best friend, how are you going to stand in front of so many strangers and share you story?" Sage questions making a incredible point.

"Do you think that I'm ready?" I ask feeling apprehensive.

Sage looks at me hard. "Baby, I know that you are strong and capable enough to tell your story. It is you that decides if you're ready or not."

Her words sink in, ones which had been repeated to me multiple times. Now I fully understand them. I have to do this. Not for my parents, or my sister, or my friends. Not for the victims, not for the fans. Not even for Sage. This needs to be done for me. To give me peace.

I look over at my woman's beautiful face.

Yes, peace is the goal. I need to stop letting my past control me so I can move forward—mentally.

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