Mask | ✓

51

I missed Nixon.

I missed being surrounded by his scent; I missed seeing his brown eyes; I missed his smile—I missed him. After I left, I tried to give him some space to calm down in hopes that he'd call. Maybe I was just being impatient, but fuck, I missed him.

I wanted nothing more than to go back to the Silver Night for him, but I meant what I'd said before. I needed to look out for my pack as well. These spontaneous trips back and forth couldn't become a habit.

"Are you okay?" Celia asked me, making my attention turn to her. Her eyes were filled with concern.

"I'm just a little down," I admitted rather than lying about it.

"Is it because of the man you went to go see, or..." her eyes trailed down to a pile of beta candidates in front of us.

The three of us were currently trying to pick the best ones, and I'd be lying if I said that didn't add to my already sad mood. Ever since the day we argued, and he left, Reo hadn't called me. At first, I gave him space because it wasn't unlike him to go silent when he was angry, but as time passed, no call came, and I couldn't help but feel a little down about it. I'd tried to call him, but it just went to voicemail, and when I spoke to Archer, the answer was always the same.

He wasn't ready to speak to me just yet.

"A little bit of both," I said to Maia.

She fell silent before shaking her head and letting out a long sigh. "Tatum, when are you going to start putting yourself first?"

"What?"

"You put everyone before yourself, and yet, you're still not happy."

"I'm trying—"

"You're trying to look out for your pack, trying to protect your home," Celia jumped in. "But what I think Maia's getting at is that it's okay to be a little selfish once in a while. You need to think about what you want and be happy too."

Maia nodded. "Look around; the pack has been doing much better. Does that make it perfect? No. Does that mean you should stop caring for it? Of course not, but what it does mean is that the pack won't collapse if you decide to focus on yourself for once. Everyone here understands that you have a life as well, Tatum. Don't waste it."

The two of them stared at me, and I took a deep breath before we returned back to work. Their words stayed on my mind for the rest of the time we spent in there, though. It's okay to be selfish.

...

Time flew by quickly, and after hours of searching, there wasn't a single candidate that I was completely happy with. Sure, there were some good ones, but none of them felt as if they would fit into the pack or get along with me. If they were to be my beta, it was important that I felt like we could talk comfortably without there being some issue every five seconds. I didn't have the time or the patience to deal with it.

Some of them had great reputations as fighters and for other skills, such as trackers. Still, the reports on their attitudes were what ultimately turned me away—yelling at a child because they accidentally dropped their food in a crowded area. I didn't want those types of people in my pack. A beta wasn't supposed to be feared by their own pack members.

"That was the last one," Celia announced as she placed a file down into the no stack. "What now?"

"We wait," Maia said. "There's no need to rush to pick one when this choice will ultimately affect the pack greatly. There will be a time when someone who fits comes along. We've been doing fine for now, so let's keep it that way."

I agreed with her words. I wasn't going just pick someone for the sake of being able to say that we had a beta.

"Alpha Tatum, there are two wolves standing at the border who are wanting to speak with you," one of the warriors on guard linked me.

Judging by the tone of his voice, something was wrong. Worry ran through me, and I quickly stood up.

"There are some unknown wolves at the border; I'm going to check it out," I informed Maia and Celia.

In a flash, the two of them were up as well.

"We're coming," Maia told me.

I didn't bother trying to say no, knowing that it wouldn't stop them. The three of us quickly left the room and hurried down to the border. As we did so, I tried to figure out what reason we'd be getting visitors. Unless there had already been a preplanned meeting of some sort, the Howling Night never really received visits, and that was the way the majority of the pack liked it.

The fact that I hadn't received any requests for meetings or visits didn't sit well with me.

As we walked, I tried to remain calm and not set off the pack. That was the last thing needed. When we got close to the border, one of the warriors was waiting for us. Her hair was tied back, and her eyes were focused on where I knew the other warrior assigned to patrol duty had to be waiting with the wolves in question.

"Tell me what happened," I said to her.

"Nicholas and I were watching when two wolves showed up. At first, they were calm and asked to talk to you. However, Nicholas turned them down, and one continued to try and argue, so Nicholas got annoyed and linked you," she informed.

So it wasn't serious. That calmed and annoyed me at the same time. I shook my head and continued to walk down in order to see who was causing trouble. I continued to walk through the rest of the woods until I reached the clearing where Nicholas stood.

His hands were crossed over his chest, and his mouth was formed into a thin line, showing his annoyance. That wasn't what made me stop, though. First, it was the scent that entered my nose. The moment I smelt it, my eyes followed to where Nicholas was glaring at, and I didn't know if I should shake my head or grin.

Standing there was Nixon, who mirrored Nicholas' stance, but what really surprised me was Eli standing at his side with his head dropped, likely from Nixon's actions.

Nixon's head snapped over to me, and I could see the way his eyes lit up, which made my heart beat faster.

"Tate," he said quietly, but there was a vast amount of emotion in his voice.

Nicholas and the others stared between us in an attempt to figure out what was going on, and I let out a sigh.

I should've known that if there was trouble, then Nixon was involved.