Owned by Him (Editing)

Memories and Food

They had been driving for quite a while now, though with being the tied up, drugged up mess I was in the trunk, I had no way of knowing just how long. I didn't care all that much, I’d just hoped to have been able to decipher just how far from home I was. After the first dose of whatever sedative Jordan had given me, I’d lost count of how many turns they had taken. I wasn’t going to complain though, whatever the sedative was, worked wonders on all of my ailments. My thoughts were blurred by an impenetrable disorientation and I didn’t mind at all. The drug had soothed over all of my senses, allowing my poor body to rest. 

For a while, I listened to Jordan conversing with Jase. The two of them were mocking me about how I had “bleated” like a wounded sheep whenever Jase threw his fists against my head. It was nothing aside from the ordinary. The two of them always used to ridicule me after Jordan had smacked me around, why would it be any different now? 

I tuned them out after a while as their vexatious laughter was beginning to irk me. 

I instead decided to try and remember a time where Jordan and I had been authentically happy. Fooling myself into believing that Jordan had once loved me was a tactic of comfort in which somehow ameliorated the fact that he actually just loved to keep me around to satiate his need to hurt me. 

As much evidence as there is that Jordan is incapable of love, I still held those first six months close to my heart. It sounds so unlikely now but we had once been the couple that others wished to be. We were passionate, tender and carefree. We shared a warmth that no soul could douse, a connection that you only read about in fairytales and a love that was so strong I thought would last forever. 

I remember the day I told Jordan that I loved him. We were attending his cousin’s wedding up in the far North. The venue had taken my breath away with just how exquisite it was. It was so stunning that it allowed me to forget all about the six and half hour drive we endured to get there. My God it felt as though it were a lifetime ago. 

Jordan had introduced me to Evan a year or so before the wedding and we had gotten on as though we were old friends. He was shorter than Jordan but his eyes were similar in shape and his hair was the same dark shade. You could easily see that the two of them were family. Evan, aside from Eric and Raina, had been the only other member of Jordan’s family that I had met. 

The wedding took place at a ravishing stately home. The gardens had been covered in white and red roses, the aisle had been lit by red and white tea lights weaved through the wooden structure and the arch where Evan and Wyn stood was simply mystical. 

 As Evan spoke his vows, promising to love and protect his future wife, Jordan had gently taken my hand into his and brought it to his lips. He pressed them against each of my knuckles before whispering how much I meant to him. Regardless of all that had happened, I would never forget how insanely happy I felt in that moment. I felt as though I were the luckiest woman in the world, as though that in the near future it would be us standing in front of a beautiful fountain promising to love one another for the rest of time. If only I’d have known then what I do now.

Once the ceremony had been concluded, we all followed the newlyweds into the dining area of the venue. The interior had been designed to replicate the same of an old tudor building, though it was slightly more modernised. With the thick wooden beams, light pastel painted walls and the rather regal paintings with their thick golden frames, it looked as though it were fit for a Queen to dine within. 

The speeches were filled with funny stories and loving memories and the three course meal we had afterward was absolutely divine. Jordan and I had asked for the Garlic Ciabatta for starters, the Beef Wellington with roasted vegetables for mains and the chocolate fudge cake for the dessert. I had eaten it all except the asparagus that came with the mains. Those, I had fed to Jordan. I remember that on the final stalk, he deliberately moved his face to the side so that my finger went into his mouth instead of the vegetable. He sucked on my finger gently, his eyes alight with desire. The sensation was one I had never felt before, one that had formed a wetness between my legs.