wolf, upon learning how jimmy did a magic trick: So you're not magic?
jimmy: Well, not really.
wolf: You're just a liar.
_________________________
jimmy: Ew. What kind of tea is this?
wolf: I boiled gatorade.
_________________________
donald: *on the phone* Just snap his kneecaps and he'll talk, I'm at a parent teacher conference.
donald: Anyways, you said wolf is enjoying finger painting! That's great.
_________________________
forrest: Are you this rude to everyone?!
wolf: Yup.
wolf: Don't think you're special.
_________________________
jake: So I got this amazing plan!
forrest: We fail almost every time you say that.
jake: Well this is the same! But with a hamster involved.
_________________________
wolf: Can I ask you for a favor?
jimmy: I would literally die for you, but continue.
wolf: We need to talk about you starting sentences that way.
_________________________
forrest: I haven't slept in seventy-three hours.
wolf: Eighty. Democratically elected leader of insomnia.
donald: Bitch, it's been ninety for me. I'm going for an even one hundred.
jake: You guys are fucking terrifying.
_________________________
jimmy: THEY COME SEASONALLY!
jimmy: THEY COME EVERY YEAR!
forrest: What- jake, is he drunk again-
jimmy: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHERE I GO!
jimmy: WHAT DOES IT MEAN
jake: What does WHAT mean?
wolf, who is the only one who knows what jimmy is talking about: I mean, when you found one in the bathroom-
jake: WHAT THE FUCK DID jimmy FIND IN THE BATHROOM?
jimmy: I'M TELLING YOU LIKE- LIKE IN THE SWIMMING POOL-
jimmy: IN L.A.
jimmy: EVERYWHERE I GO, THE DUCKS COME TO ME!
forrest and jake: Oh, for fuCKS SAKE jimmy-
_________________________
jake: Hello wolf, made anyone cry today?
wolf: Sadly, no. But it's only 4:30.
_________________________
donald: Where's jake?
wolf: Doing stuff.
donald: I don't like the sound of that. Where's forrest?
wolf: Trying to stop jake from doing the stuff.
donald: And jimmy?
wolf: Trying to stop forrest from stopping jake from doing the stuff.
donald: I see. And what are you doing here, wolf?
