chapter twenty seven

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I dropped my bags to unlock my apartment's door. The flight back from London had been long and exhausting. It was almost three in the morning when I got out of the airport and the only thing I wished to do right now was to lay in bed. But when I finally reached it, something felt off. Like my bed was too big for only myself to be in it as if something, someone needed to fill the empty spot next to me. My body kept moving around the bed, trying to find a comfortable position where it would felt less vacant, less lonely. For the first time in my life, positive thoughts were keeping me awake rather than anxious ones. I turned on my side, grabbing the untouched pillow where he should be resting and hugging it tight to my chest. But, it was nothing like hugging him. Ever since I boarded that plane, I craved for touching him again, meeting his piercing blue eyes or kissing his soft pink lips. Ever since I boarded that plane, I wished to go back to London, completely dreading tomorrow where I would go back to work. To the real world where I couldn't ignore or mute my problems.

After a moment, I abandoned the idea of sleeping, there were only a few hours left before I had to get to the studio, to help Julia wrapping our stuff. I sat on my bed, straightening my back on the wall behind it and scrolling through my phone. I had barely touched it all weekend, the notifications constantly popping on my screen and overwhelming me. I never thought that one post from Jamie would have had that much of an impact on my life. Sometimes, I forgot that he is a very well-known actor. When we were together, it was just us. Whatever us meant, I just knew that I had never felt that way about someone in my life. Like I can be myself with all of my flaws and life story and still feel very appreciated by him. But as I scrolled through my notifications, I seemed to notice that not everyone liked that I was hanging out with him, the comments making sure to make me overthink every little thing about myself. I sighed before closing my phone, I wished he was here to reassure me, to take me in his arms but he wasn't.

So, I got out of my bed and walked across the apartment to seek for the comfort I was looking for. I slowly opened the door, causing a creaking sound to echo in the room before I tip-toed and crawled in my best friend's bed. I slightly and gently shook Gwen to wake her up but she only grunted as a response.

"Gweni." I whispered, causing the brunette to slowly open her eyes, her face lighting up as she realized I had came back from London.

"Omg, hey." She hoarsely exclaimed, putting her arms around my neck and hugging me. "How was your little escapade?" She smiled.

"Good."

"I can see your eyes glow in the dark." She chuckled, bringing me along with her. "I saw the pics on Instagram, you could have at least told me you were staying."

"It was kind of a last minute decision." I smiled.

"What made you choose to stay?" Gwen asked, genuinely interested in knowing my reason as I debated with myself if this was the right moment to tell her everything. But Hawthorne's words from the car resurfaced, stopping me from revealing my true feelings.

"I don't know." I shrugged. "It just happened, I guess."

"I'm happy for you." She nudged me with her shoulder. "For once, you didn't overthink a decision you made for yourself and look where that got you: completely in love with a celebrity."

"I'm not in love." I scrunched my eyebrows together, frowning at her choice of words but Gwen looked at me, snickering to the denial of what she had said, not completely believing me. "I'm not!" I exclaimed a little firmer.

"Whatever you say, babe." She chuckled, causing me to smile and roll my eyes to her beliefs, knowing deep down that I could clearly see myself fall for Jamie. I closed my eyes, trying to find some sleep now that the bed felt less empty with Gwen by my side but it still wasn't the same as I knew that when I would wake up tomorrow, Jamie wouldn't be there. Like he was this morning, holding me tight in his chest.

20 HOURS EARLIER Jamie grunted to the shutter sound coming from my phone before he rolled his body to join me in the middle of the bed as I adjusted the sheets over my body, hiding the almost bare parts of it

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20 HOURS EARLIER
Jamie grunted to the shutter sound coming from my phone before he rolled his body to join me in the middle of the bed as I adjusted the sheets over my body, hiding the almost bare parts of it. We didn't do anything that night but kissed, my body nor my mind was ready for going further yet but he made me feel the safest and I never felt an ounce of pressure coming from him. I smiled to the half-asleep boy beside me, my hand caressing the hair out of his face as he opened his eyes with difficulty. Jamie wrapped his arms around my lower back, pulling me into his chest, my head now perfectly rested on it to hear his slow and calming heartbeat. I placed a slight kiss on his bare chest before looking up and meeting his eyes. Even in the morning, he looked perfect, hair messy and eyes squinted. I couldn't keep myself from staring at the one who had finally break my walls, the one who had listened to my body's subliminal messages. Jamie greeted me, placing a kiss on my temple and tightening his embrace as if he needed for me to be even closer to him. I greeted him back, stars in my eyes when recalling our previous days together. It had been such a wonderful weekend, a break from the outside world, from the reality that awaited us.

"I gotta get ready for my flight." I whispered, dreading the moment when I'd have to leave his bed and his side.

"How about we start with breakfast." Jamie proposed, also dreading the moment, slowly breaking our embrace to get out of bed. I grinned to the view, Jamie in only a pair of underwear caused my cheeks to warm up as I soon followed him in the kitchen. I sat on one of the high chair at the counter, just like I had always done for the past two morning, asking him if he wanted some help but he quickly declined, saying that he wanted to treat me for my last day in London. Making breakfast was probably the most mundane thing ever yet I couldn't be happier to do it with Jamie. While the boy started searching for something to cook, I grabbed my phone which I had barely touch over the whole weekend, looking through the notification I had ignored. He must had seen the shift change in my face as he walked behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, his chin resting on my shoulder.

"Hey." He softly spoke, making me put down my phone on the counter. "You shouldn't read comments. Trust me."

"I know." I sighed, recalling everything I've read under both of our posts. "It just feels weird. Like yesterday I had barely a hundred followers and now..." I cut myself off, feeling my heartbeat picked up as every breaths became heavier and harder to inhale. Jamie twirled me on the seat, lifting my chin with the tips of his fingers which were unusually ring less. All of those negative thoughts seemed to fade away when I was met again with his blue eyes. Jamie thoughtfully scratched his head, making his curls even messier than they were. He smiled to me before saying, "I forgot to do the groceries so how does a nice and milky bowl of cereal sounds?"

"The sugary kind?" I asked, a smile tugging at the corner of my lips.

"Always." He stepped closer to me, his chest pressing against mine as he leaned in and kissed me like no one ever did, my heart fluttering whenever he was near.

__________________________________

Hello, this book is coming to an end (only a few chapters left...)

So tell me what you want to see before the end and I will try my best to include some of it.

The mystery around the death of Charlotte's dad will be revealed and so will some secrets *cough* Hawthorne *cough*

Anyways, hope you enjoyed!

Love,

-J

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