A brother and a sister.
One is the captain of the hockey team in a small town while the other aspires to be the best figure skater out there. But what happens when they cross paths after a year of being apart, and everything has changed.
One doesn...
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| Annalise Lauren |
"Lied Too"
When all else fails, just go and sit on a pier, in the middle of winter, knowing that you might get a cold, but with not a single care in the world, you don't move your frozen limbs. It was the only thing I knew that I could feel beside sadness for myself.
I swung my legs back and forth, as I stared down at the dark water below me, really wondering how my life had come to this. Every other normal teenager should be at home, rugged up in bed, not contemplating life.
Every daughter should be able to approach their mother when they feel like this. They should be able to talk to their mothers' about anything and everything they want too without being yelled at or told that you aren't good enough. That you aren't even good enough for the family name you were given when you were born.
I had always been told that the death of Riley and River was my fault, even though when they passed, I would have been standing beside my mother. But that was the problem. I was beside my mother, and Riley wasn't.
Growing up, Riley had been my mothers prized possession. She did everything my mother asked for, perfectly. I was always compared to her; she was supposed to be my idol, the person I became, the person I looked up to. But she never really was, if all it took was for the way my mother treated me now, to make me forget everything about my sister.
I felt horrible that I couldn't remember much about my sister, but I had been busy. I had always had to be catching up to someone, whether or not it was my own sister or my own enemy. But nothing I ever did was ever good enough for my mother.
Just being present in the same household was the least of my mother's worries.
I turned my body slightly, reaching for my phone, as I saw one missed call from my brother. I dismissed it, and scrolled through my phone till I found what I was looking for. I pressed play on it, hearing a familiar voice come from my phone.
"Hey, you have reached the voicemail of River Lauren. Please leave a message and I will get back to you when I have the time. Love you"
River had always been my favorite. No matter what was going on in his life, he always made a special commitment to me, as weird as it sounds. He would always be at whatever I needed him to be at. If it was special to me, it was special to River.
So, hearing his voice on repeat brought me peace and comfort as the tears trailed down my cheeks, over and over again. I looked out to sea, on the familiar pier that River would drive the two of us too when he had his license, so that I would be able to fall asleep.
I had always had trouble sleeping whenever my mother was mad at me. I was a child that was constantly yelled at, and I always felt guilty and at fault. So, I would never sleep unless I was with River, because I always had to say sorry to my mother, but she was never there. I could never find her, and that would make it worse.
