Treasure of the sea |Lesbian story|

CHAPTER XXXVIII

The horror of having killed came later, with a clear mind, when the battle was long over and humanity and empathy suddenly fell back on me. I remembered the blood and the expressions of those two men. I realized that I had committed an irreversible action, yet I refused to listen to that voice inside me whispering assassin, assassin, assassin. I let myself slide to the floor, my back resting on the bars, my knees clutched to my chest, and I wept and despaired and hated myself. I hated myself so much, especially when my mind formulated a specific thought, that mantra I repeated to myself over and over again to keep from collapsing completely. Better them than me.

The crew left me in peace. They stared at me, some pitying, some annoyed, and listened to my sobs that filled the cell. No one said anything, no one tried to comfort me. No one knew how.

The cell was sultry, full of humidity and oppressive heat, so that it was difficult to breathe. We had very little space to ourselves, as we were so crammed in that it was impossible even to stretch our legs. The floor underneath us was so ruined that small sharp splinters were sticking into my thighs and palms.

Arenis was thrown into the cell without much care twenty minutes later. She was unconscious and for a moment we all thought she was dead, but she wasn't. It was Dilthey who made sure of that. "She is still breathing. Captain, Captain!" He shook her hard, but she did not move or open her eyes.

"No use doing that. Thorpe must have drugged her," Naade said as he gently lifted her eyelids and checked her eyes.

"Will she recover?" I asked.

"It will take some time."

Eddie took off his jacket, rolled it up and slowly lifted Arenis' head, tucking the jacket under the back of her head to make her more comfortable. For a while we all stood staring at her, almost shocked to see her so still and static.

The Black Star had managed to escape. Dilthey, more than anyone else, was relieved. The universe had answered his prayers.

"Nassau is a few hours' journey from here," he said, more to himself than to others. "Even if the ship is battered, they'll be all right. They'll be all right for sure...."

"Why did they capture us? Why did they leave us alive? What do they want with us?" asked Eddie at one point.

"I think they wanted to capture the Captain. She was the target."

"But why?"

"I don't know."

"Where do you think they're taking us?"

"I don't know that either, Eddie. I'm just as confused as you are."

"I can't believe it. I refuse to believe it. Not them. Not them... We've worked together for so long. We all know each other so well. Why? Why are they doing this to us-?"

"Isn't it obvious?" intervened Dilthey. "Why do we do what we do? What do we live for if not for profit?"

"We have never betrayed our people! Never, never!"

"Everything has a price. Before money, even friendship disappears."

"Bastards. "

Then, it was a guy named Lucas who spoke up. "Who died? Have you counted them?"

No one had. No one had the courage. My mind immediately formulated the image of Quinn falling to the ground, dead. I closed my eyes, trying to remain calm.

"Too many."

"Judging by the number of people here we've lost... seventeen, eighteen?"

"Nineteen."