Treasure of the sea |Lesbian story|

CHAPTER LVI

Towards the afternoon of my penultimate day in Nassau, I suggested to Arenis that we take a walk on the beach. I don't know why I asked her. I had uttered the invitation on the spur of the moment, without thinking. Unconsciously, it seemed, I had a constant desire to spend my time with her. I absent-mindedly put on the straw hat I had bought a few days earlier to protect myself from the sun's rays, and strolled side by side with Arenis on the main street of Nassau, assuming an indifferent attitude. She was asking me questions, telling me about the work on the Black Star and about our new friends, the Bonny's. I answered her passively, without delving into any subject. Suddenly I had begun to dread our closeness, our understanding of each other. We reached a lonely beach and it was there that we sat down, on the sand. It was a bright, inspiring day; vessels sailed on the blue sea. Arenis, in spite of all my gloom, amused herself like a child by throwing stones into the sea, making them leap over the waves. From time to time she would sneak a glance at me, trying not to show her distress. It was obvious that she was worried about me. But she did not force me to speak, she never brought up the subject, almost as if she was afraid too. She pretended not to have noticed anything and her cheerfulness, though sprinkled with distress, was rampant. Her open smiles and laughter were a burst of music and made that sunny day even more blinding.

"Will you continue studying?" she suddenly asked.

"What?"

"In Charlestown, I mean. I know that all these months you haven't had a chance to deepen your knowledge because of me and I was wondering... do you miss studying?"

"Not so much, but once I'm in Charlestown I think I'll go back to studying."

"You should try to impose yourself again."

"What do you mean?"

"Never give in. Try to get the recognition you deserve from the academic world. And even if it seems like a lost cause, don't give up. Make them angry. Make them irritated. After all, that too is satisfaction."

"Getting people riled up?"

"Hmm." Arenis nodded her head seriously.

I burst out laughing. "Well, you are not wrong."

"Write a book, an essay, anything. I know you are capable of it. You could use a male pseudonym, then you would be taken into more consideration. Don't let them stifle all your knowledge, don't dare believe you are worth less than them just because you are a woman."

"I don't think so. Not anymore," I stated confidently. "It was you who changed my mind about what a woman can and cannot do."

Arenis raised an eyebrow, impressed, and stared at me. "Really?"

"Oh, yes. And I have to thank you for that."

I lifted a handful of sand and, clenching my fist, slid it down in a rivulet. Then I turned my gaze towards her and we stared at each other for a fraction of a second too long. Arenis was the first to look away, throwing her gaze over the horizon.

The harbour was packed with all kinds of ships, and the air smelled of the pitch that sailors used to caulk their hulls and decks. A fishing boat docked and men began to cast nets full of shiny, darting fish onto the quay. I ran a hand over my tired eyes. I had not slept well.

"The ship is ready to sail," Captain Fernsby informed me and I nodded, nervous.

They were all there. The entire crew of Arenis had arrived in the harbour to say goodbye one last time. Only she was not there.

Jackie Jay had hugged me several times, squeezing me so tightly that I felt suffocated. Dinnington was caressing Athena. He gave her a quick kiss on the head and said goodbye several times, while she lay lazily in his arms. Eddie had managed to put his anger aside and pressed a kiss to my cheek, wishing me a good life. Even Sabre was moved and could not hold back his tears. Stevenson was the last one I said goodbye to.