Bear: Devil's Rose MC #7

Chapter 12: Kate Thatcher

I can feel Reaper staring me down from behind me. He allowed Persephone and me to take the two seats in front of Alpha's desk, so he took the couch behind us. However, he's most definitely using it to his advantage. He's trying to read me, trying to make me transparent. 

As much as I understand his protective nature, I also get the feeling that he's trying to find my weaknesses if he would ever have to hurt me. I can't stop him without seeming suspicious, and how would I stop him anyway? 

He has every right to watch me closely, and I don't think anyone else is going to stop him soon. In any case, maybe they asked him to. I know that I don't know everything happening behind the scenes of this operation. 

I'm used to that though. I can deal with that. I can't find any comfort in being stared at as though my soul is being discovered. It's not like anyone would be able to be comfortable with that.

Especially from a man named Reaper.

I straighten my back, signaling to Reaper that I know what he's doing, but he doesn't cease. I didn't expect him to. I am just getting my message out.

"Kate, we have the logistics down. How are you feeling about the execution?" Alpha asks me, distracting me from Reaper's intensity.

"I can execute your plans. This isn't my first operative."

"I know you can do it, but how are you feeling about it? You have to kill your father."

"No, Persephone, I don't. I have to kill a dangerous man who harms people. Sure, he's my father, but that's nothing compared to the motherfucker he is."

She reaches out and squeezes my hand which sits limply in my lap.

"Go get some rest, Kate. You might not think so, but this is going to be difficult."

Persephone isn't wrong. While I wouldn't outwardly admit it, I know this is going to take a toll on me. There are so many reasons that I want to do this. There are so many reasons that I need to do this, but even then, I return to my emotions. 

He's a shitty father, but he's the only one I've got. My mother and I will finally be able to see each other again once he's gone, but is that me choosing one parent over another? Isn't that something I shouldn't be doing? 

I guess I chose my father over my mother before. I didn't have much of a choice then, but I did. I didn't run off with her, and I didn't protect her when I should have. That was a mistake. I don't regret staying because I knew it was better for her safety for me to stay (he would have gone after me and hurt her in the process), but I should have done more to protect her from my father. 

In a way, going after my father now and allowing her to live her life more freely is my way of apologizing to her. This is my way of protecting her now, and that matters over anything else. So what if I'm choosing her over my father? 

Isn't that the whole point? Prioritizing innocent people and protecting them over the asshole that wants to hurt them? That seems right to me. Even if I have to kill someone who raised me, raised me horribly, but raised me regardless.

Persephone pats my hand again, standing to walk around the desk to her husband. She pulls out his chair from the desk without any protest from Alpha and gracefully places herself in his lap. 

Reaper and I get the message at the same time, practically jumping out of our seats and pushing ourselves out the door. He gives me one last look, not any softer than the ones before but less judgmental before disappearing around the corner. I should probably get back to Bear's kids anyway.