Lovesick // TOMORROW X TOGETHER [TaeBin / SooKai]

Chapter 21 - The disaster broke upon me

(Trigger Warning: Death / Blood)

Song Recommendation for this Chapter: "Places/Plans" by Skullcrusher  / "Whisper" by Park Ji Woo

"Why are you here?" Soobin asked when they got to his room. Kai walked over to his bed, but didn't sit down yet. He looked at the polaroid wall and closer at the polaroids that Soobin did with Taehyun that Kai hasn't seen yet.

"I just came by for fun." He sat himself down on the bed and looked up at Soobin, a big smile filling his face.

It frustrated Soobin that after this whole day of ignoring his feelings towards the guy sitting on his bed now, he had to throw all his efforts out the imaginary window as the feelings hit him like a truck again. It then struck him that he strained himself so much to ignore and forget Kai, that at the end of the day he couldn't stop thinking about him at all. All that he remembered from this day was the vivid imagination of Kai in Soobin's head and his smile occupying most of his thoughts. It made him furious.

"Don't you wanna sit down?" Kai asked cutely, tapping his hand on the space next to him on the bed. Soobin wanted to restrict himself from accepting his offer, but he neither could refuse it nor could he stop his body from doing exactly what Kai asked him to do.

When he sat down next to Kai, the profound heat in his chest rose to a strong extent. In that moment, he remembered the time when the three of them sat on the hood of the car and watched the stars as both of them reached out to hold Soobin's hand. He realized that both of these touches made his heart flutter back then.

"How was your day?"

"Horrible." Soobin spat out and the shock set in immediately.

"Oh, that bad? You didn't even hesitate a bit." Kai chuckled at that but only as much as appropriate to this rather pessimistic answer.

Soobin would have rather punched himself for that stupid answer, but the only thing he could do now was lie again. But what should he say?

"I mean... You know... the usual."

"'The usual', you know that the usual is not getting emotionally abused by a prick?" Saying it like that makes it seem more terrible than expected.

Soobin couldn't look into Kai's eyes, so he just stared at his hand that was propped up between them. He imagined how it would feel to lay his own hand on top of his. Just like Kai's hand did when they stargazed.

Kai noticed Soobin's absence and tilted his head down to look into Soobin's face. The right corner of his lips turned up a little while he looked at him like that.

"I didn't want to scare you with the truth."

"Huh?" Soobin got torn from his thoughts.

"Oh. No, it's just..."

He didn't actually know what to say to that so he looked down at Kai's hand again. Kai followed Soobin's gaze and grinned slightly at the sight. He then moved his hand away from the place and propped it up behind his back. Soobin had to forcefully stop looking at Kai's hand and looked into his face again. His expression showed that Kai was amused by Soobin's behavior. He was confused.

"I know it's annoying to constantly get confronted with it when we meet up, but I doubt that you really have anyone else to talk about it with."

"About what?"

"Beomgyu."

Soobin was at a loss for words. It wasn't like he had gotten used to everyone, including himself, constantly talking about Yeonjun and what Soobin thought of it all. But Kai was the first to address Beomgyu directly and not use Yeonjun as a segue to mention him as well.