Chapter 13 On the date

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  Mingyu looked at the girl sitting in front of him. 

   Her face was flushed and she looked excited but also shy. She hadn't made a proper eye contact with him since they have met at the cafe. Her eyes glancing everywhere as if curious but the smile on her lips remaining constant, so much so that even Mingyu's cheeks felt painful looking at her smile. 

   Maybe she was so happy that her lips and cheeks weren't feeling any pain. 

   Mingyu sipped the bitter and cold Americano and his taste buds felt refreshed leaving a bitter lasting taste. 

   Mingyu recalled that day when he got back home after letting out his anger, Scoups almost had a heart attack after seeing his bleeding fist. 

   He thought that Mingyu had gotten into a fight with someone on his way home. He started panicking and asking many questions to Mingyu. 

   Mingyu was actually not in a mood to say anything. 

   But when Scoups brought the medicine kit and started cleaning his wounds carefully, making sure that he is doing it softly to not make Mingyu feel painful and then started bandaging him, that's when he really broke down. 

  As any sane human is unable to resist the genuine care and love of someone close to them so the wall they have built up around themself is also unable to resist that person. 

   Mingyu confessed to Scoups about what had happened and what he was going through. He felt ashamed when he told Scoups about his feelings for Wonwoo. They were friends but he has such feeling towards him, how could he not be ashamed? 

   When Scoups first heard Mingyu saying "Hyung, I.... I-I like Wonwoo hyung" He couldn't process these simple words forming one sentence in his mind. 

   His face was full of question marks as he stared at Mingyu for a whole while as if dumbfounded but Mingyu felt like crying feeling his gaze on him.

    He was already feeling embarrassed and nervous and also the thought of Scoups judging him because of his feelings made him more emotional. Finally all the bottled up emotions since the morning broke like a dam and Mingyu started sobbing like a child. 

   "Hyu-hyung, don't look at me like that. I know what I feel is wrong and I shouldn't feel it" Mingyu said in an uneven, sobbing voice. 

    There's this fallacy in the society that men don't cry and should not cry. Mingyu knows this and always tries to control his emotions so as not to cry easily but he fails everytime. He can't control his emotions, at least not in front of the people who are close to him. 

   Why should men not cry? Are they not human?! Every human being and even animals cry so why does society expect men to not cry? 

   Mingyu was going more and more off topic in his mind. He felt all his grievance and all the negativity flowing freely through his sobs. He just want to curl up in his bed and sleep away his worries. 

   He was about to get up when he felt the strong arms of his big brother envelope around him in a warm hug. 

    Mingyu's head was resting on Scoups's abdomen as Scoups circled Mingyu's shoulders with occasionally caressing his hairs Scoups softly said to him "It's okay" And "It's all gonna be alright"

    Mingyu first felt astonished then cried harder and then eventually calmed down. His heart felt settled and at peace after saying his feelings and worries out loud to someone. 

    Then they both talked with each other for some more time. Scoups was of course an understanding older brother so even if he was shocked at first, he didn't really disapprove Mingyu's feelings for Wonwoo. 

    He was also supportive of Mingyu and promised Mingyu that he won't tell all these things to any of their friends until he is ready. It's just, when Mingyu said that he wants to date a girl and forget Wonwoo slowly that Scoups shook his head with disapproval. 

   In his opinion, Mingyu should confess his feeling to Wonwoo. Only when Wonwoo truly rejects him will Mingyu truly be able to let go of his feelings. But as Mingyu is not ready to confess his feelings to Wonwoo, Scoups too can't do anything about this. So he just said that he will support Mingyu no matter what he decides. Mingyu felt fortunate that Dokyeom wasn't home at that time because telling Scoups everything was easy than telling to his other friends. 

    For Mingyu the last day of their camp was like a roller coaster ride. He had never felt so many ups and downs in his whole life as many he felt in just one day. 

    After that everything went back to normal except Mingyu stealing more and more glances at Wonwoo. Him being more and more conscious of Wonwoo's presence everyday. Also him being more sensitive and attentive about matters related to Wonwoo. These changes were very subtle so that if not thought about it carefully then no one would notice it. 

    After two weeks, Wonwoo told him that he had talked with his cousin about Mingyu and she has agreed to go on a date with him. He also gave his cousin's phone number on his own and asked him to text her if he wants to ask or tell her anything directly. 

    So after a whole week of casual chatting with Wonwoo's cousin sister Jeon Minji, they both decided to meet on the weekend for the date. 

    For Mingyu, even after trying to develope feelings for her before actually coming on this date, he has been unsuccessful. He tried looking at her pic many times, tried staring at it and tried to feel something, tried to stir his heart but to no avail. 

    In the end he thought that maybe after meeting her in person he would be able to feel something but all he felt was emptiness and awkwardness inside. 

    No, he did feel something.... 

    He just felt sorry for her. Seeing her happy and eager eyes he felt that she deserves someone better than him. 

    What should he do now? He don't want to break her heart after giving her hope. 

    'Let's just go with the flow then' Mingyu thought with some conflict. 

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I feel like greeting my readers everyday but I don't know what to say😅

Well, I'm feeling a bit fine now and have a great day or night respectively😌

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