Endurance (book 1 of Jade and Nika)

Chapter 20: Sleep talking

Nika

This is the second time I woke up with Jade in my arms, but instead of moving around. I woke up to her talking.

At first she wasn't making any sense, but now I think I understand what she is talking about and who she is talking to.

Jade- I am sorry that I disappointed you. I am sorry that I am not the daughter that you wanted. But it doesn't change the fact that I am wanting to be with Nika.

Jade- Mom please don't do that. Please just hear us out. Please just listen to me.

Jade- you never listen to me. You never even got to know me. This is the reason I didn't even want to tell you in the first place.

Jade- please don't leave mom. Please don't shut me out.

Jade- No mom I can't just do that. She means something to me. That's why I told you about us. I wouldn't of told you unless it was important.

Jade- You want me to choose between my family and Nika?

Jade- This is killing me mom I...

Jade- I guess I...

Jade- okay I...

She stopped sleep talking, and honestly I don't know what to think. But now I know that she is scared of telling her mother about us. But why?

I think back to the conversation that I had with Hana Months ago. She told me that Jade's mom would never allow her daughter to be with a woman. I didn't know that it was this serious.

I looked down at Jade in my arms, and I started to cry. I don't want to lose her, because I love her. But I also don't want her to have to choose between her family and me. Because I know her so well that she can't just walk away from her family. But we can't keep our relationship a secret forever. So what do we do?

I stayed up the rest of the night, because of that question. And the answer that I came to I didn't like. I know this because if her mom is that homophobic, then we will come to an end.

So for now I am just going to live in denial, because I want to be with her as long as I can have her. I know it's selfish, but I got to do what I got to do.

Three hours later

Jade started to wake up because I felt her moving in my arms. I looked down at her and she looks up at me. I kissed her good morning, but she knew something is wrong.

Jade- Did I wake you again?

No, I am just very nervous about meeting your parents and making a good impression. So yeah I didn't sleep well because my brain wouldn't turn off. (Such a lie.)

Jade- It will be okay. Plus you have seen my parents multiple times.

Yeah but I never had a real conversation with them. What if they don't like me?

Jade- they are going to like you, just be yourself.
Except there's one thing that I need to tell you.

She sits up and looks at me, and I know exactly what she's going to say. I sit up and hold her hand to reassure her.

Jade- I need to tell you something about my mom.

What about your mom?

Jade- she doesn't know about us. And that's because she's a republican and she is homophobic. And I know that she won't approve of us being together. So when my mom is around...

You don't want us look like more than friends.

Jade- exactly. Are you okay with that?

As long as I get to be with you I am okay with it.